# Fine fellatio cuisine - recipie swap (TMI)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 19, 2005, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100 "2005-07-19T04:20:03Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 14\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/1 "2005-07-19T04:20:03Z")

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I don’t know where to start. My brother from out of town has just left after a wonderful four-day visit. Understand: this is my baby brother - 10 years younger than I am. I changed his diapers for crissake. I’m still trying to adjust to the fact that he’s allowed to drive.

Yes, he’s living with someone – good for them. I have no problem with the fact that the kid’s likely 10 times more sexually active than me, although on the few occassions I’d think of it I imagine that once or twice a year they might done it - missionary style, clean up immediately afterwards.

So imagine my triple shock at the following discoveries (TMI alert):

1. fellatio is a common feature of their antics, mental denial image notwithstanding, a detail they’ve foisted onto my awareness without my consent
2. taste is significantly influenced by recent diet
3. THERE ARE RECIPIES TO TAILOR THE TASTE TO ONE’S PALETTE

My sweet, innocent baby brother’s favourite recipie is called [The Super Spunk Smoothie](http://www.dontspitswallow.com/cum_taste.shtml).

(more TMI) Mrs. Call & I have enjoyed bilingual oral communication, but have never sampled the culinary aspects.

What are your experiences? What “recipies” work best? How long before should one consume the primer concoction? What differences, if any, are there between male and female, ahem, serving dishes?

(while you collect your thoughts on the matter, I’ll be upstairs, looking at baby photos, remininscing the innocent days gone by…)

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**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/2 "2005-07-19T05:23:57Z")

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Should I have to mention that that link isn’t really work safe? There’s no pictures, but there is some language that might trip up a filter.

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**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/3 "2005-07-19T05:30:11Z")

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Oh, man. I saw that picture of garlic on the top of the page, and I kept thinking “Og, that dude has big, big balls. And a very tiny peepee.”

Hey, this is a girl who’s been with a dude who was smaller than a tampon. It wouldn’t be past believing.

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**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/4 "2005-07-19T05:31:16Z")

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> [@Anastasaeon](#):
>
> Hey, this is a girl who’s been with a dude who was smaller than a tampon. It wouldn’t be past believing.

I meant his peepee. I don’t mean I dated Tom Thumb. :smack:

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**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/5 "2005-07-19T05:53:57Z")

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But what size tampons? That’s the real question here.

I want to know how this knowledge was achieved. I remember the time I heard my younger sister and her husband, who was her boyfriend at the time, sharing activities of a carnal nature. I was skeeved beyond all recognition. I had to leave the house and sit down on the porch for a while. Of course, my reaction was nothing to that of my mom’s a few days later when she and my aunt came to help me move out. While cleaning, they discovered condom wrappers that the lovebirds couldn’t be bothered to throw in the trash can. You would have thought they’d seen a gigantic bug in the house or something.

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**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/6 "2005-07-19T06:00:09Z")

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> [@Harimad-sol](#):
>
> But what size tampons? That’s the real question here.

You know the o.b. tampons? Not much bigger. When ready to go.

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**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/7 "2005-07-19T06:05:25Z")

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> [@Anastasaeon](#):
>
> You know the o.b. tampons? Not much bigger. When ready to go.

Huh. Wow.

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**Author:** ![Antonius\_Block](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/51bf81/32.png) [@Antonius\_Block](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antonius_Block)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/8 "2005-07-19T10:17:25Z")

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Well, I don’t usually post in the TMI-type threads, but there’s a first time for everything.

I don’t think that it’s _that_ unusual for couples to modify their diets to improve the taste of their --um-- secretions. I’ve certainly done it with a few girlfriends, and no-one freaked out when the subject came up. The OP only talks about _fellatio_ (i.e. where the male is producing fluid), but the same basic rules apply for _cunnilingus_ (where the fluid-producer is female).

My experience has mainly been along the following lines:

_General_:  
If one’s diet is rich in garlic and onions, this will be apparent during oral sex. However, if one is blessed with partners who _also_ love the [Allium](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allium) family (as has generally been the case for me, and it’s _not_ a concidence), then it’s Garlic-o-Rama all around anyway, and nobody even notices. _[Maybe this is the one flavor the [Gilroy Garlic Festival](http://www.gilroygarlicfestival.com/) has yet to get its hands on!.]_

_Specific_:  
No [asparagus](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_383.html). Really. This is a shame, because I _love_ asparagus, but I love certain other things in life even more. Thus, I’ve found myself in the situation in the past of having been invited to dinner as part of a couple, then finding out that asparagus is on the menu and communicating via under-the-table footsie or arm-stretching semaphore codes, to determine whether one or both of us should politely decline asparagus for the evening. (Usual response from host: “But you _loved_ asparagus when we had you over the other week while **Ms. X** was out of town!”). For some reason, it’s not a subject one can politely discuss with most hosts!

When one member of the couple is traveling alone, phonecalls home can usefully include the line “I’m eating as much asparagus as I can find!” and everyone’s happy.

I’ve not really gone in for the “deliberate enhancement” methods used by the OP’s brother, although I’m aware of the pineapple, citrus, and cranberry theories. Modesty forbids me from discussing whether any enhancement is even necessary… 😃

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**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/9 "2005-07-19T12:45:06Z")

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I’ve heard it said, that a woman’s genital area is a bit acidic, so things like pineapple juice, which are said to be good for a man’s secretions, are actually bad for a woman.

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**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/10 "2005-07-19T14:47:08Z")

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_falling on her knees and praising Og that her eight-years-younger little baby brother (okay, he’s 21, but he’s still my baby brother) has never said a single word to her about his sex life or lack thereof_

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**Author:** ![Antonius\_Block](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/51bf81/32.png) [@Antonius\_Block](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antonius_Block)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/11 "2005-07-19T20:55:52Z")

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> [@whiterabbit](#):
>
> _falling on her knees and praising Og that her eight-years-younger little baby brother (okay, he’s 21, but he’s still my baby brother) has never said a single word to her about his sex life or lack thereof_

Word to the wise, **whiterabbit** : if your post in an oral sex thread starts with **“falling on her knees”** , people are going to have certain… expectations! :eek:

[**Antonius Block** , grateful that neither of his (older) sisters read the SDMB…]

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**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/12 "2005-07-19T21:00:37Z")

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Hey I know that guy, I slept with him once.  
_Once._

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**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2005, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/13 "2005-07-19T21:01:51Z")

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Ooops, that was supposed to be preceded by a quote from **Anastasaeon** ’s last post.

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**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\
**Post date:** [July 20, 2005, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fine-fellatio-cuisine-recipie-swap-tmi/313100/14 "2005-07-20T01:32:55Z")

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Let’s just say I was let into a lot more information than I wanted to know about my two best friends’ sex lives when I noticed that as well as tampons, the vending machine in the ladies toilet at the bar we were in sold “VI-CON:The world’s first vibrating condom”.

Eating less asparagus and more citrus and pineapple to make your semen taste better doesn’t cause a blip on my radar after THAT conversation.
