# First Contact Scenario **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 11, 2010, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360 "2010-09-11T01:07:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Balthisar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/balthisar/32/2825_2.png) [@Balthisar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balthisar)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/21 "2010-09-11T13:50:22Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Do they wipe out the Taliban because they’re Muslim, or because they’re very conservative, or because they’re extreme religionists? You really don’t see the difference between the Taliban and, say, the Latter Day Saints? :dubious: Anyway, I’d be trying to figure out how to get a ride on one of the aliens’ spacecraft. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/22 "2010-09-11T13:52:34Z")
I do see a difference. But will the aliens? And are we talking about the more mainstream Mormons, or the FLDS? Because I see a difference between those two sects, as well. Will the aliens recognize ANY difference between any of our religions? ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/23 "2010-09-11T14:32:57Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Lock and load. If they’re mortal, they can be killed. I will figure out how, or die trying. And why would you try to kill them? > [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I do see a difference. But will the aliens? And are we talking about the more mainstream Mormons, or the FLDS? Because I see a difference between those two sects, as well. > > Will the aliens recognize ANY difference between any of our religions? They’ve tapped into our information systems and analyzed virtually all information in both public and private archives. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/24 "2010-09-11T14:36:29Z")
Sure, they might understand that WE think our religions are different. But will they care enough to differentiate between the religions? ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/25 "2010-09-11T14:37:22Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Sure, they might understand that WE think our religions are different. But will they care enough to differentiate between the religions? In what sense? Discrimnate against a particular religion? ---
**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/26 "2010-09-11T15:07:14Z")
So all-powerful aliens who can’t be stopped and who won’t leave have shown up and for some reason they judge who gets to live and who dies based on a particular viewpoint in American politics. Well, I can’t do anything to stop them, but since they’ll probably be looking for a new scapegoat once they’re done killing off every conservative Muslim on the planet, I’ll oppose them to the best of my ability. ETA: Not that I think the aliens _should_ kill off the entire Taliban and its supporters, but it sounds like I won’t have much of a chance to protest either. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/27 "2010-09-11T15:26:16Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I do see a difference. But will the aliens? And are we talking about the more mainstream Mormons, or the FLDS? Because I see a difference between those two sects, as well. > > Will the aliens recognize ANY difference between any of our religions? Sure, they will come along and tell us how we ALL got it wrong. The correct God is %^!!, and the correct religion is %^!!ism, and we better start prayin’ like mutherfuckers to %^!! ASAP. Or else. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/28 "2010-09-11T15:46:27Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Lock and load. If they’re mortal, they can be killed. I will figure out how, or die trying. Your proposition is acceptable. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/29 "2010-09-11T15:49:01Z")
How’s that Oakminster suit fit? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/30 "2010-09-11T16:23:25Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > > [@Oakminster](#): > > > > Lock and load. If they’re mortal, they can be killed. I will figure out how, or die trying. > > And why would you try to kill them? Because they attempt to impose their will on us. Oak don’t play that shit. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/31 "2010-09-11T16:30:55Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > How’s that Oakminster suit fit? A bit tight in the ass. ---
**Author:** ![Cumberdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Cumberdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cumberdale)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/32 "2010-09-11T16:46:37Z")
As Peter Graves said in **It Conquered the World** : \*He learned too late for himself that men have to find their own way, to make their own mistakes. There can’t be any gift of perfection from outside ourselves. And when men seek such perfection… they find only death… fire… loss… disillusionment… the end of everything that’s gone forward. Men have always sought an end to the toil and misery, but it can’t be given, it has to be achieved. There is hope, but it has to come from inside, from Man himself. \* No matter how awesome the aliens and how cool the gifts, some will resist. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/33 "2010-09-11T17:43:20Z")
The OP assumes that the benevolent aliens just want to serve man… So my first reaction would be…ask 'em to show me their cookbooks. (note: if ya don’t get the reference, shame on you! Now go look up some guy named Rod Serling…) ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/34 "2010-09-11T19:15:21Z")
> [@The\_Tooth](#): > > > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > > > How’s that Oakminster suit fit? > > A bit tight in the ass. ROFLMAO. Well played, Sir. Well played. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/35 "2010-09-11T19:18:12Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > The OP assumes that the benevolent aliens just want to serve man… > So my first reaction would be…ask 'em to show me their cookbooks. > > (note: if ya don’t get the reference, shame on you! Now go look up some guy named Rod Serling…) …who adapted it from a 1950 short story by Damon Knight. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/36 "2010-09-11T19:41:48Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > > [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > > > Sure, they might understand that WE think our religions are different. But will they care enough to differentiate between the religions? > > In what sense? Discrimnate against a particular religion? In the sense that they WON’T discriminate between any Terran religion. That is, they might very well tell us to stop believing in ANY gods. You seem to assume that they’ll think that Christianity is great. What if they think it’s a bunch of hooey, on a par with believing in the Tooth Fairy? That is, they might think that religion is fine for youngsters, but it’s time we, as a species, grew out of it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2010, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/37 "2010-09-11T20:43:44Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > > [@The\_Tooth](#): > > > > A bit tight in the ass. > > ROFLMAO. > Well played, Sir. Well played. And the trigger finger itches. No offense, just playing with the words. ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2010, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/38 "2010-09-12T00:27:34Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > > [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > > > In what sense? Discrimnate against a particular religion? > > In the sense that they WON’T discriminate between any Terran religion. That is, they might very well tell us to stop believing in ANY gods. You seem to assume that they’ll think that Christianity is great. What if they think it’s a bunch of hooey, on a par with believing in the Tooth Fairy? That is, they might think that religion is fine for youngsters, but it’s time we, as a species, grew out of it. Suppose they are deists but tolerate all religions as long as it non-violent and doesn’t oppose their “protectorate” violently. ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2010, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/39 "2010-09-12T00:43:23Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > > [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > > > In the sense that they WON’T discriminate between any Terran religion. That is, they might very well tell us to stop believing in ANY gods. You seem to assume that they’ll think that Christianity is great. What if they think it’s a bunch of hooey, on a par with believing in the Tooth Fairy? That is, they might think that religion is fine for youngsters, but it’s time we, as a species, grew out of it. > > Suppose they are deists but tolerate all religions as long as it non-violent and doesn’t oppose their “protectorate” violently. Would that include non-violent conversion? That is to say, if the aliens arrival prompted everyone to become, let’s say, Wiccan, what would their reaction be? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2010, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360/40 "2010-09-12T01:11:35Z")
I would think it would be far more likely that they are atheists, and one of their instructions to the human race is to get over all our god delusions. What if they tell us we can have virtual immortality through their medical technology, and an interstellar drive to go out and visit the universe, if we dump our religious beliefs – all of them. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-contact-scenario/553360.md?page=3)