# First gay "first kiss" in US Navy happens; world doesn't end **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 21, 2011, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016 "2011-12-21T23:52:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2011, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/1 "2011-12-21T23:52:12Z")
The AP is reporting that 2 women shared the “first kiss” when one of them returned from 80 days at sea aboard the USS Oak Hill. [ > [@](#): > > Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta of Placerville, Calif., descended from the USS Oak Hill amphibious landing ship and shared a quick kiss in the rain with her partner, Petty Officer 3rd Class Citlalic Snell of Los Angeles. Gaeta, 23, wore her Navy dress uniform while Snell, 22, wore a black leather jacket, scarf and blue jeans. The crowd screamed and waved flags around them. > > “It’s something new, that’s for sure,” Gaeta told reporters after the kiss. ]([http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US\_NAVY\_GAY\_KISS?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2011-12-21-17-57-16](http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_NAVY_GAY_KISS?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2011-12-21-17-57-16)) I’m very happy for them, and even happier to read what the commanding officer aboard the USS Oak Hill had to say about it: > [@David Bauer](#): > > “It’s going to happen and the crew’s going to enjoy it. We’re going to move on and it won’t overshadow the great things that this crew has accomplished over the past three months.” Apparently the ship’s crew held a raffle, at $1/ticket, for the right to have the first kiss when they returned to port, and Gaeta won after spending $50. Her CO said that > [@](#): > > Gaeta and Snell’s kiss would largely be a non-event and the crew’s reaction upon learning who was selected to have the first kiss was positive. It’s good to see that the doomsayers appear to have been wrong (again). Congratulations to these 2 women, to the US Navy, and to all of America for being able to live peaceably (at least as far as this is concerned) in the 21st century! ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2011, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/2 "2011-12-21T23:56:49Z")
The fact that it’s two women definitely diminishes its significance to me. Most straight people _seem_ to be far more tolerant of two women kissing than two men kissing. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2011, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/3 "2011-12-21T23:59:29Z")
Baby steps, **AT**. Baby steps. ETA: in a few years, I’m sure it’ll look like a San Francisco parade whenever a ship comes back to port. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/4 "2011-12-22T00:04:39Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > Most straight people _seem_ to be far more tolerant of two women kissing than two men kissing. That’s because they might start fighting. Wait, I might have gotten that backwards ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/5 "2011-12-22T00:17:43Z")
Hot. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/6 "2011-12-22T03:30:43Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > The fact that it’s two women definitely diminishes its significance to me. Most straight people _seem_ to be far more tolerant of two women kissing than two men kissing. On the other hand, its a point for female equality. I used to help run a GLBT film festival and a common complaint from lesbians was that they were apparently fighting for “gay rights” but “lesbian rights” were somehow just - not important (and go get me coffee). Got to see it in action. It was - disappointing - that you get rid of the sexual politics and men were still treating women like second class citizens with second class concerns. This was back in the dark ages (the 1980s) - but your comment was reminiscent of why “the concerns of gay men” were more important than those of lesbians. (And granted, it was when AIDS sending the community to a lot of funerals. There, they had a point). ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/7 "2011-12-22T03:36:22Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > The fact that it’s two women definitely diminishes its significance to me. Most straight people _seem_ to be far more tolerant of two women kissing than two men kissing. > [@Dangerosa](#): > > On the other hand, its a point for female equality. I used to help run a GLBT film festival and a common complaint from lesbians was that they were apparently fighting for “gay rights” but “lesbian rights” were somehow just - not important (and go get me coffee). Got to see it in action. It was - disappointing - that you get rid of the sexual politics and men were still treating women like second class citizens with second class concerns. > > This was back in the dark ages (the 1980s) - but your comment was reminiscent of why “the concerns of gay men” were more important than those of lesbians. (And granted, it was when AIDS sending the community to a lot of funerals. There, they had a point). And purely outside of the realm of gay vs. lesbian rights, it’s darned rare that women make a first _anything_ before men do. To have a lesbian couple beat a gay couple to this is a strong point for female equality even beyond sexuality. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/8 "2011-12-22T03:37:27Z")
Well, it’s definitely a significant event, and nobody’s rights are any more important than anyone else’s, but I do think that society is just more tolerant of lesbians than gays. Part of it probably has to do with the fact that “gay culture,” for lack of a better term, _seems_ more overtly sexual than “lesbian culture.” Men are, after all, hornier, and when you think of the gay sex scene, the image is lots of random, casual sex with many partners (think hundreds or _thousands_ of partners.) There doesn’t seem to be the same scene for lesbians; if anything, the lesbian stereotype is two women settling down forever - often to the point where they don’t even have sex anymore. Now which of those two things is more palatable to Joe and Jane Average American in the Bible Belt? ---
**Author:** ![Buchanan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Buchanan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buchanan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/9 "2011-12-22T03:43:45Z")
There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/10 "2011-12-22T03:47:13Z")
Tough. Welcome to the real world. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/11 "2011-12-22T03:47:19Z")
That is such a lame argument. There are a million issues that are uncomfortable to talk about with kids. Death, for instance - I think that’s a hell of a lot more uncomfortable to discuss with a child, but you’re going to have to do it anyway. Suck it up! ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/12 "2011-12-22T03:53:52Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. My kids (now 13 and 16) have been hearing about it since they were 4 or 5. It was only as uncomfortable conversation as I was. Which wasn’t very much, so all went well. It doesn’t have to be a big deal at all. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/13 "2011-12-22T04:05:53Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. Perhaps you shouldn’t have taught your 4-year-old that the only “right” way was for a prince and a princess to hook up. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/14 "2011-12-22T04:06:11Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. If it’s easy, you’re not being a good parent. Get over it. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/15 "2011-12-22T04:08:57Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. I’m not ready to explain to my non-existent children how and why there are people in the world who have a problem with this. So there. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/16 "2011-12-22T04:09:34Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > My kids (now 13 and 16) have been hearing about it since they were 4 or 5. It was only as uncomfortable conversation as I was. Which wasn’t very much, so all went well. It doesn’t have to be a big deal at all. Agreed: children of any age will only be uncomfortable about men kissing men, or women kissing women, in public if their parents show that they are uncomfortable with it. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/17 "2011-12-22T04:12:15Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. 1955 called and wants it intolerance back. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/18 "2011-12-22T04:12:33Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. They are special friends who missed each other. You’re welcome. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/19 "2011-12-22T04:13:34Z")
> [@Buchanan](#): > > There were young kids - toddlers - on the dock, waiting for their. parents to arrive. Homosexual public displays of affection trigger uncomfortable conversations with your children. If I’m not ready to explain to my 4 year old that there can be “two princes” or “two princesses”, now I have to. This is a problem for me. I suggest you consider joining an Amish community, if two people expressing love and affection with a simple kiss is going to irrevocably taint your sweet, innocent little lambs o’ God. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2011, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016/20 "2011-12-22T04:15:16Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > Agreed: children of any age will only be uncomfortable about men kissing men, or women kissing women, in public if their parents show that they are uncomfortable with it. That’s pretty much it. Children are resilent and open right up until their parent reacts and teaches them how they should react. From things like this to getting knocked on their ass and seeing their parent overreact. It isn’t something you necessarily do with intent, it is all about what your children observe from you. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-gay-first-kiss-in-us-navy-happens-world-doesnt-end/607016.md?page=2)