# First thread. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 14, 2011, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072 "2011-07-14T23:36:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mewl\_Dear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Mewl\_Dear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mewl_Dear)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/1 "2011-07-14T23:36:59Z")
This is the first thread I have stared. Will I get snarked like that other guy? ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/2 "2011-07-14T23:44:44Z")
It depends. What other guy? Welcome, BTW! ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/3 "2011-07-14T23:45:08Z")
Hi. Nice that you could join us. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/4 "2011-07-15T00:04:03Z")
I stare at threads too. For very long periods of time. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/5 "2011-07-15T00:06:18Z")
Pfft. Do something snarkworthy first. ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/6 "2011-07-15T00:06:52Z")
Don’t worry. My first threads only got a few replies, and nobody even welcomed me to the SDMB. You’re already off to a great start. Welcome aboard! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/7 "2011-07-15T00:13:21Z")
> [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > This is the first thread I have stared. Will I get snarked like that other guy? Depends, are you an asshole? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/8 "2011-07-15T00:14:13Z")
> [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > This is the first thread I have stared. Will I get snarked like that other guy? Are you referring to JimH52’s recent [thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=616216)? If so, I doubt you’ll receive that kind of reception. JimH52 must have expected the kind of response he was going to get when he started his first thread in an established board with a challenge that we were doing everything wrong. I assume he got the reaction he wanted. Some people insist on making a big splash even if they have to jump off a tall building to do it. ---
**Author:** ![Mewl\_Dear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Mewl\_Dear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mewl_Dear)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/9 "2011-07-15T00:22:59Z")
I don’t know how to do snark-worthy on purpoise. But I am willing to learn. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/10 "2011-07-15T00:44:18Z")
Welcome, welcome! Would you like some ice cream? It’s [del]frisky[/del] fresh! > [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > I don’t know how to do snark-worthy on purpoise. But I am willing to learn. No, wait! That’s backwards. We’re trying to avoid snarkworthiness! After all, the first rule of this board is, “Don’t be a jerk!” ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/11 "2011-07-15T00:45:19Z")
> [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > I don’t know how to do snark-worthy on purpoise. But I am willing to learn. You could learn to spell porpoise correctly first. After that almost anything you do on the porpoise would be snark-worthy. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/12 "2011-07-15T01:07:35Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > You could learn to spell porpoise correctly first. Psst. The “o” and “i” key are just one fat-finger distance from each other. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/13 "2011-07-15T01:16:58Z")
> [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > This is the first thread I have stared. Will I get snarked like that other guy? It depends. How much you got on ya? Huh? Joe ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/14 "2011-07-15T01:36:18Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > Psst. The “o” and “i” key are just one fat-finger distance from each other. Duh. That’s why it’s so easy to spell porpoise correctly. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/15 "2011-07-15T02:41:35Z")
I’m still waiting for my yogurt, from the last newbie. Hint. Hint. -D/a ---
**Author:** ![Toucanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3bc359/32.png) [@Toucanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toucanna)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/16 "2011-07-15T07:34:40Z")
> [@Mewl\_Dear](#): > > This is the first thread I have stared. Will I get snarked like that other guy? Word of advice: don’t let The Dope slap you on the way in. ---
**Author:** ![Tabby\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tabby\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabby_Cat)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/17 "2011-07-15T09:38:40Z")
No slap? Man. How about some tickle then? ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/18 "2011-07-15T16:44:18Z")
Hi **Mewl Dear** , and welcome! What’s the story behind your screen name? How’d you find the SDMB? What persuaded you to register? What’s your favorite forum so far? Ignore the snarking for now. We all do it. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/19 "2011-07-15T17:19:09Z")
> [@Scuba\_Ben](#): > > Hi **Mewl Dear** , and welcome! > > What’s the story behind your screen name? > How’d you find the SDMB? > What persuaded you to register? > What’s your favorite forum so far? > > Ignore the snarking for now. We all do it. Well, aren’t _you_ just the little harbinger of joy? ---
**Author:** ![brewha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072/20 "2011-07-15T18:04:12Z")
20 posts and no one has introduced him to the Squid? Or the goat? Where are your priorities people?!?! Welcome, Mewl Deer. The Goat is in the third door to your left. Please leave him there when [del]he’s finished with you[/del] you are finished. We need him for the next guy too. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-thread/589072.md?page=2)