# First time using the Urinal? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 22, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946 "2005-09-22T20:44:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/1 "2005-09-22T20:44:52Z")
I just witnessed the oddest urinating posture/position I’ve ever seen. This guy had his knees bent, and was hunched forward, and had his entire pelvis _in the urinal_. It was the damndest thing. I swear, his bits had to have been mashed against the back of the urinal! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/2 "2005-09-22T20:46:31Z")
Maybe a drag king? ---
**Author:** ![yBeayf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/e274bd/32.png) [@yBeayf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yBeayf)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/3 "2005-09-22T20:52:46Z")
Perhaps he had some sort of urethral abnormality, such as the urethra opening on the underside of the penis. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/4 "2005-09-22T20:55:23Z")
A dribbler 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/5 "2005-09-22T20:57:57Z")
He was probably doing a double duty, rinsing off too. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/6 "2005-09-22T21:18:42Z")
Ah, the cold, clean touch of _porcelain_ … ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/7 "2005-09-22T21:25:55Z")
On the upside, the splashback was probably minimized. ---
**Author:** ![spingears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@spingears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spingears)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/8 "2005-09-22T21:36:36Z")
One tall lanky basketball player said to the other, “The water sure is deep!” :eek: To which the second relied, “And deep too,” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/9 "2005-09-22T21:49:11Z")
> [@spingears](#): > > One tall lanky basketball player said to the other, “The water sure is **cold**!” :eek: > To which the second relied, “And deep too,” 😃 And the third said, “Look out for the turtles in the mud at the bottom!” bolding mine. ---
**Author:** ![antechinus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@antechinus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antechinus)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/10 "2005-09-22T22:06:20Z")
I have always wondered - why do some blokes put their hand on the wall and lean forward? ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2005, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/11 "2005-09-22T22:16:20Z")
We’re drunk. Helps our balance. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/12 "2005-09-23T03:08:26Z")
> [@antechinus](#): > > I have always wondered - why do some blokes put their hand on the wall and lean forward? It’s easier to flex and relax your legs and pelvic muscles a bit (without falling) in that position. Some guys find it easier to start urinating that way. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/13 "2005-09-23T03:54:12Z")
Remember that scene from Sin City, where Bruce Willis was running through the woods to rescue Nancy, and his heart condition flared up? He leaned against a tree in a position that looked more like a painful urination than a coronary. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/14 "2005-09-23T07:01:51Z")
> [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > Ah, the cold, clean touch of _porcelain_ … Eww, _porcelan._ \ [/threepwood] ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/15 "2005-09-23T12:39:06Z")
> [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > And the third said, “Look out for the turtles in the mud at the bottom!” > > bolding mine. …and the fourth said “There’s a burr at the end of the pipe!” Ba-dum bum ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/16 "2005-09-23T12:42:45Z")
> [@antechinus](#): > > I have always wondered - why do some blokes put their hand on the wall and lean forward? Which leads me to ask the question, just _why_ were you watching? :dubious: I get the thrill of dealing with adolescent boys who seem to think it’s a point of pride to stand way back from the urinal. When I have one of em on his hands and knees cleaning up the bathroom floor afterwards, it becomes not so much a point of pride, I have discovered. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/17 "2005-09-23T12:43:26Z")
What I wanna know is why some guys unbuckle their entire belt and undo all buttons and/or fly on their jeans/slacks/trousers when at the urinal. WTF? Pants have zippers! Is this some sort of pseudo-posing in the “my dick is so big it don’t fit through my fly” vein? ---
**Author:** ![Sgt.Pepper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Sgt.Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sgt.Pepper)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/18 "2005-09-23T12:49:23Z")
But those zippers have sharp metal teeth. Just the brushing against them is uncomfortable, not to mention the memory of those zippers catching a peice of skin in childhood. No, I’d rather undo it all and spread the zippers as far away as possible. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/19 "2005-09-23T12:59:00Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > Which leads me to ask the question, just _why_ were you watching? :dubious: > > I get the thrill of dealing with adolescent boys who seem to think it’s a point of pride to stand way back from the urinal. When I have one of em on his hands and knees cleaning up the bathroom floor afterwards, it becomes not so much a point of pride, I have discovered. Well, Jeez, the urinals are only a couple feet apart, so I came around the corner, and there he was. I wasn’t gawking/leering/staring - it’s just kind of hard to miss something so weird. That, and I wanted to make sure his penis wasn’t bigger than mine. :dubious: :eek: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/20 "2005-09-23T13:17:10Z")
Wojo on “Barney Miller”: You can’t point to anything in the Sears catalog and not find someone somewhere who wants to have sex with it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946.md?page=2)