# First time using the Urinal? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 22, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946 "2005-09-22T20:44:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/21 "2005-09-23T13:17:54Z")
> [@Winston Smith](#): > > Well, Jeez, the urinals are only a couple feet apart, so I came around the corner, and there he was. I wasn’t gawking/leering/staring - it’s just kind of hard to miss something so weird. > > That, and I wanted to make sure his penis wasn’t bigger than mine. :dubious: :eek: 😃 I see, so, weewee watchin’, it’s not just for gay bars any more. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/22 "2005-09-23T13:42:44Z")
> [@Sgt.Pepper](#): > > …not to mention the memory of those zippers catching a peice of skin in childhood. Childhood, my ass! That happened to me again a few months ago. Zipping up is one thing that should never, I repeat, NEVER be rushed. No matter _how_ late you are. Trust me. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/23 "2005-09-23T14:12:58Z")
> [@antechinus](#): > > I have always wondered - why do some blokes put their hand on the wall and lean forward? So that when we let the humongeus fart that accompanies a good leak, it won’t blast us through the wall. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/24 "2005-09-23T14:15:02Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > So that when we let the humongeus fart that accompanies a good leak, it won’t blast us through the wall. **MENTAL NOTE:** Never, _ever_ use the men’s room the same time as **Clothahump**. ---
**Author:** ![BwanaBob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bwanabob/32/2985_2.png) [@BwanaBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BwanaBob)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/25 "2005-09-23T14:20:51Z")
At my old job there was a partition that blocked view of the urinals from the hallway when you walked in the bathroom. One day, as I was just finishing, this guy (someone I didn’t know) came around the partition to piss with his dick already out and in his hand. I had the feeling he already had it out in the hallway. Scary shit. ---
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/26 "2005-09-23T15:57:24Z")
How about the guys who haven’t quite mastered the art of just pulling it out and end up dropping trou? According to my husband, this is much more common in the early grades of school, but he still sees it on occasion - and not at bars, either. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/27 "2005-09-23T16:34:09Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > I see, so, weewee watchin’, it’s not just for gay bars any more. 😃 [Adam Sandler] Its a Big One! [/AS] ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/28 "2005-09-23T17:04:30Z")
> [@Avarie537](#): > > How about the guys who haven’t quite mastered the art of just pulling it out and end up dropping trou? According to my husband, this is much more common in the early grades of school, but he still sees it on occasion - and not at bars, either. That one just freaks me out, why the fug should someone do that? ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/29 "2005-09-23T17:52:59Z")
Ice. Ice in the urinal is the greatest entertainment known to the modern male. It’s like handing a cat a ball of string soaked in catnip while lying on a bed of tuna. Spell your name. Try and bore all the way to China. Draw a circle and watch the sides collapse like a little avalanche. “_Ice, it’s not just for drinks anymore_.” ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/30 "2005-09-23T18:20:28Z")
The first time I found myself in a bar with ice in the urinal, I put an unopened can of Molson in there for a wheeze. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/31 "2005-09-23T18:23:23Z")
> [@Larry Mudd](#): > > The first time I found myself in a bar with ice in the urinal, I put an unopened can of Molson in there for a wheeze. _ **WHAT!?!** _ As the OP, I must insist you elaborate - you can’t mean what I think you mean! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/32 "2005-09-23T18:45:25Z")
> [@Winston Smith](#): > > I just witnessed the oddest urinating posture/position I’ve ever seen. This guy had his knees bent, and was hunched forward, and had his entire pelvis _in the urinal_. It was the damndest thing. I swear, his bits had to have been mashed against the back of the urinal! :eek: Well, that’s how I saw a **woman** using the urinal one time when I walked into a college men’s room. I am not making this up. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/33 "2005-09-23T20:59:47Z")
Ummm… Can somebody explain the basketball joke to me? ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/34 "2005-09-23T21:03:18Z")
Player one: My dick is so long it touches the water. Player two: Mine is longer. It can tell how deep the water is… etc, etc, etc. Being basketball players isn’t really relevant. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/35 "2005-09-23T23:46:36Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > Being basketball players isn’t really relevant. Being _bas **e** ketball_ players, OTOH… ---
**Author:** ![Kiminy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Kiminy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiminy)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/36 "2005-09-23T23:49:30Z")
> [@Winston Smith](#): > > I just witnessed the oddest urinating posture/position I’ve ever seen. This guy had his knees bent, and was hunched forward, and had his entire pelvis _in the urinal_. It was the damndest thing. I swear, his bits had to have been mashed against the back of the urinal! :eek: Being female, I have very little experience with men’s restrooms. However, the few that I have had the opportunity to visit included not only urinals, but at least one or two toilets, for excretions that wouldn’t normally be handled by a “urine”-al, and with stalls for more privacy. It seems to me that this gentleman maybe needed more privacy than a normal urinal provides, but didn’t know how to use a toilet for pee… Or maybe it was a woman, who was too drunk or crazy to realize that she was in a men’s restroom. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/37 "2005-09-23T23:55:50Z")
> [@Coldfire](#): > > What I wanna know is why some guys unbuckle their entire belt and undo all buttons and/or fly on their jeans/slacks/trousers when at the urinal. That’s gotta be incredibly awkward, trying to piss while having to keep your undone pants from falling down around your ankles. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/38 "2005-09-24T03:15:34Z")
My sister, her boyfriend, and his two sons were at church and Sis took one of them to the bathroom (she waited outside, of course!). Someone came out and asked her if that was her boy in the men’s room, and then informed her that he was _sitting_ in the urinal, taking a poop. Apparently he’d never seen a urinal before and thought it was just some strange type of toilet (he was only about 5 yrs. old though). She had to summon the boyfriend to tend to the cleanup (and the way I feel about said boyfriend–well, let’s just say I enjoy the image of him having to do the old poop scoop! 😃 ). ---
**Author:** ![soulmurk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b782af/32.png) [@soulmurk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulmurk)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946/39 "2005-09-24T04:39:05Z")
> [@Coldfire](#): > > What I wanna know is why some guys unbuckle their entire belt and undo all buttons and/or fly on their jeans/slacks/trousers when at the urinal. > > WTF? Pants have zippers! Is this some sort of pseudo-posing in the “my dick is so big it don’t fit through my fly” vein? Can’t speak for others, but on occasion I find myself at a urinal while wearing a pair of button-fly jeans. Undoing the belt and a few of the buttons is pretty much a requirement, mostly because it’s awkward and cumbersome to unbutton (even moreso to rebutton) the buttons under the flap without undoing the top one first. Never had to undo _all_ of them though. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/first-time-using-the-urinal/322946.md?page=1)