# Fit mom posts Facebook pic along with her 3 kids asking 'What's your excuse?' - Firestorm ensues **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 23, 2013, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010 "2013-10-23T04:47:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/21 "2013-10-23T14:21:04Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > She has a 8 month old kid and looks like that? Wow! I like this quote. Smart lady. Is it really smart to put that kind of effort into dropping weight right after you have a child? ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/22 "2013-10-23T14:29:35Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > As a former mentor called them, “Little Tom Bombadils”. Kings of their tiny ponds, powerless outside of it. I love that! ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/23 "2013-10-23T15:25:35Z")
> [@Obsidian](#): > > Either “I can do it, so can you,” or, “Motherhood can make you better,” would have sounded much less bitchy and there wouldn’t be this much blowback. I think “You CAN have it all” would have worked too. I’ve seen “What’s your excuse?” used in advertising and self-promotion before, and it always generates the same negative feeling in me. I mean, good for the blind and deaf double-amputee who climbs Mount Everest on the weekends and tutors inner-city schoolchildren. But inspirational stories speak for themselves. Adding the “What’s your excuse?” stuff naturally provokes feelings of defensiveness and guilt/shame. As far as Kang goes, I wonder if showcasing her small children as personal achievements also rubs people the wrong way. She may have cute kids, but cuteness doesn’t tell us how happy and well they are. Simply looking “hot” doesn’t tell us how hot she is as a mother. For all we know, the tradeoff of having a hot body as a mother of three is that your children come out as bratty jerkfaces. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/24 "2013-10-23T15:40:45Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Adding the “What’s your excuse?” stuff naturally provokes feelings of defensiveness and guilt/shame. That’s usually the exact reason people say “what’s your excuse,” so that shouldn’t have been a surprise to anyone. This woman was able to lose that weight. Good for her, she can be proud of that if it matters to her. Going after other people and saying that they are capable of doing the same - and suggesting that if they haven’t, they’re lazy or have some other failing - is just unpleasant and judgmental. It’s the mark of an immature person that they can’t be proud of their own accomplishments unless they’re also calling other people failures. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/25 "2013-10-23T15:45:14Z")
> [@astro](#): > > [And the “favocates” also weighed in.](http://www.themilitantbaker.com/2013/10/my-excuse-im-glad-you-asked.html) A little warning would be nice next time. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/26 "2013-10-23T15:50:13Z")
> [@Bob's Zombie](#): > > It’s the mark of an immature person that they can’t be proud of their own accomplishments unless they’re also calling other people failures. This sums up exactly how I feel about her and her statements. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/27 "2013-10-23T16:07:39Z")
> [@Bob's Zombie](#): > > Is it really smart to put that kind of effort into dropping weight right after you have a child? Not if you’re breastfeeding. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/28 "2013-10-23T16:39:02Z")
> [@Rachellelogram](#): > > A question worded that poorly doesn’t invite debate or dissent, it just shames fat people. Which I guess works for her, since she doesn’t seem the type to hang out with fatties anyway. There are legitimate reasons that what works for her doesn’t work for everybody. Not everyone can afford healthy food and a gym membership. Not everyone is a mesomorph. Not everyone was born with a pretty face and treated like a beautiful person all their lives. Not everyone was raised by health-conscious parents who taught them proper diet and exercise habits starting at birth. Not everyone lacks mental health issues or motivation to get to the gym most days. > > But you know, keep fighting the good fight. :rolleyes: Not to mention, she states right in her article/interview (paraphrased) “my husband helps out a LOT”. That is KEY in being able to look like that. I’m sorry, (and as a former gym rat, I KNOW), it takes tons of time and very dedicated scheduling to look like that, it’s not something a single mom can accomplish by wheeling kids around the neighborhood in a stroller (during the 20 minutes she might have off from the three jobs she’s working to help keep kids in diapers for instance). The implication behind her bitchy so-called “inspirational” message is “this isn’t that hard, why are YOU such a loser / screw-up /non-woman (because you don’t have a perfect body)”? Again, I do NOT fault her for having such a great figure and working at it. I do NOT fault her for being proud of it or flaunting it. It’s all about HOW she said it, not that she said something at all. I’d have a lot of respect for her if she owned up to it and said “you know, you’re right, I didn’t think about how the wording would come across, I apologize”. But no, she just keeps digging that hole “this could be taken a lot of ways, and I really meant it the nice way” (yeah right). ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/29 "2013-10-23T16:53:33Z")
On review… So her actual job IS as a fitness person? Somehow I missed that in her interview. So in other words, she doesn’t have to work 8 to 10 hours at a regular job and then fit in fitness, fitness IS her 8-10? Oh for Pete Sake, yeah, what’s wrong with the rest of us. Back in the day, when I still worked in the field in my job, that in and of itself (hiking around the woods, lifting heavy things, lots of bending and such) was enough to keep me fit. I’ve never been slim though, I’ve got what my Hawaiian friends called “da Monroe”. And you know what? Frankly, I’d rather have what’s under this current layer of grandma fat if the alternative is to have no waist. At least I HAVE an actual figure, not a straight up and down (albeit very slim and cut) boy’s body. It’s there, ready to be uncovered, sorta like “hot in the bank”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/30 "2013-10-23T16:58:37Z")
I’m trying hard to understand why there is such a strong reaction to what a fitness buff/trainer said on her facebook page and on her own blog. It’s like she sent a personal email message to every fat person in America insulting them by name. Is that what happened? ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/31 "2013-10-23T17:00:41Z")
She got pretty big during her third pregnancy. At least she was willing to get pregnant. I recall the Biggest Loser coach Jillian got in trouble for saying she didn’t ever want to get pregnant. She was worried what it would do to her body. That went over badly. [![](http://www.mariakang.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMG_4119FinalEdit.jpg) ](http://www.mariakang.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMG_4119FinalEdit.jpg) [![](http://www.mariakang.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMG_4145.jpg) ](http://www.mariakang.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMG_4145.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/32 "2013-10-23T17:10:34Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#): > > Again, I do NOT fault her for having such a great figure and working at it. I do NOT fault her for being proud of it or flaunting it. \*\*It’s all about HOW she said it, not that she said something at all. \*\* I’d have a lot of respect for her if she owned up to it and said “you know, you’re right, I didn’t think about how the wording would come across, I apologize”. But no, she just keeps digging that hole “this could be taken a lot of ways, and I really meant it the nice way” (yeah right). (Bolding added) I think it comes across the same way as those ads with Kelly LeBrock saying, “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful!” I couldn’t help thinking, “OK, how about I just hate you because you’re a vain snobby jerk?” No doubt at all that a lot of us could do much better to get fit, and it’s the human condition to make excuses, but the ridiculing tone of her comment does little to motivate–it just antagonizes. ---
**Author:** ![Skara\_Brae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Skara\_Brae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skara_Brae)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/33 "2013-10-23T17:18:25Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > I’m trying hard to understand why there is such a strong reaction to what a fitness buff/trainer said on her facebook page and on her own blog. It’s like she sent a personal email message to every fat person in America insulting them by name. Is that what happened? Well, it did go viral, so a lot of people had it pop up in their newsfeed without prompting or anything. And her message is kind of snotty, implying that basically the rest of us don’t have any excuse, since she can do it with three kids, and we are overweight because we were lazy or something. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/34 "2013-10-23T17:28:22Z")
It’s amazing how much people read into three words. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/35 "2013-10-23T17:34:37Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > At least she was willing to get pregnant. What? ---
**Author:** ![Skara\_Brae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f0a364/32.png) [@Skara\_Brae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skara_Brae)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/36 "2013-10-23T17:41:19Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > It’s amazing how much people read into three words. Do you think she was genuinely asking? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/37 "2013-10-23T17:55:28Z")
> [@Skara\_Brae](#): > > Do you think she was genuinely asking? I think she was genuinely self promoting. You can’t pay for this kind of advertising. ---
**Author:** ![Kable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ed655f/32.png) [@Kable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kable)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/38 "2013-10-23T17:58:14Z")
The haters reek of jealously. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/39 "2013-10-23T18:02:13Z")
> [@Chanteuse](#): > > (Bolding added) > > I think it comes across the same way as those ads with Kelly LeBrock saying, “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful!” I couldn’t help thinking, “OK, how about I just hate you because you’re a vain snobby jerk?” No doubt at all that a lot of us could do much better to get fit, and it’s the human condition to make excuses, but the ridiculing tone of her comment does little to motivate–it just antagonizes. Ding! Ding! Ding! ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010/40 "2013-10-23T18:03:45Z")
> [@Kable](#): > > The haters reek of jealously. Take that, internet! /Drops router [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fit-mom-posts-facebook-pic-along-with-her-3-kids-asking-whats-your-excuse-firestorm-ensues/672010.md?page=3)