# Five-Word Movie Review **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 4, 2014, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494 "2014-02-04T16:53:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 165
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2026, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3282 "2026-08-22T03:51:25Z")
_Age of Innocence_ Winona Ryder or Michelle Pfeiffer? _A Boy and His Dog_ Girlfriend or dog? Tough choice. _Holes_ Choice between freedom or justice. **Movies that improved on the books they adapted** ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3283 "2026-08-23T03:26:51Z")
_Limitless_ Book is great; movie better _Patriot Games_ Much better than Clancy’s novel _Contact_ _Far_ better than Sagan’s novel Next up: **Movie adaptations of novels that were much, much worse than the original** ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3284 "2026-08-23T03:43:33Z")
_Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children_ Great book, turned awful movie _Watchmen_ Alien invasion became nuclear annihilation _The Dark Tower_ All books ain’t one movie Next: **Movies that even Tom Hanks couldn’t save** ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3285 "2026-08-23T05:44:36Z")
_Joe vs. the Volcano_ All women are Meg Ryan? _Bachelor Party_ SPLASH set the bar high… _Forrest Gump_ Did not watch it twice. **Movies written by _National Lampoon_ alumni** ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3286 "2026-08-23T11:11:42Z")
> [@Horatio\_Hellpop](#): > > _Forrest Gump_ > Did not watch it twice. I wish I could have not watched it more than once. ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3287 "2026-08-23T15:41:50Z")
_National Lampoon’s Animal House_ Drunken fraternity finally does right. _National Lampoon’s Vacation_ Family road trip turns disastrous. _Sixteen Candles_ Family forgets teen girl’s birthday. **Movies in which a baby is born** ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2026, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3288 "2026-08-23T20:19:15Z")
> [@](#): > > Movies in which a baby is born _Yours, Mine and Ours_ #19 doesn’t choose a side. _Way Down East_ Born, baptized, and [spoiler alert]. _Rosemary’s Baby_ But “Guy has normal eyes!” NEXT: **Movies with a mixed marriage** (however defined) ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2026, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3289 "2026-08-24T02:29:01Z")
_Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner_ White parents get a shock _Love Actually_ Keira, Chiwetel totes adorbs together _Othello_ Any filmed version will do Next up: **Movies that feature truly happy marriages** ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2026, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3290 "2026-08-24T13:29:56Z")
_CODA_ Deaf people fuck very loudly. _Cheaper By the Dozen_ Many, many kids: happy parents? _The Addams Family_ Gomez, Morticia are so lustful. **More movies that feature truly happy marriages** ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2026, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3291 "2026-08-24T15:18:17Z")
_The Brady Bunch Movie_ From TV to big screen _Four Weddings and a Funeral_ It ends with happy marriages _When Harry Met Sally_ Took awhile to get there Next: **Terrible marriages** ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2026, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3292 "2026-08-26T19:05:29Z")
_Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?_ Taylor, Burton blast each other _The Godfather_ Connie, Sandra have terrible husbands _The War of the Roses_ Douglas, Turner turn to violence Next up: **Mafia comedies** ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2026, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3293 "2026-08-28T13:51:04Z")
_Mafia!_ Like _Airplane!_, but the Mob. _The Whole Nine Yards_ Nebbishy dentist befriends mob boss. _The Family_ Joisey mob family in France. **Memorable sequences in the credits or post-credits** ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2026, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3294 "2026-08-28T16:10:47Z")
_The Avengers_ Heroes, eating shawarma, in silence _Zombieland: Double Tap_ Murray’s cameo saves boring movie _Toy Story_ Blooper reels from a cartoon? Next: **More memorable sequences in the credits or post-credits** ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2026, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3295 "2026-08-29T05:43:19Z")
_Catch Me If You Can_ Very cool animated title sequence _Contact_ Ultralong panning shot opens movie _The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring_ Galadriel’s voiceover sets the stage Next up: **Best movies of Cate Blanchett** ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2026, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3296 "2026-08-29T15:58:34Z")
_Thor: Ragnarok_ Family’s squabble destroys a world _The Aviator_ Her Katharine Hepburn is unparalleled _The Shipping News_ Her “Petal” still haunts me Next: **Best movies of Julianna Moore** ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2026, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3297 "2026-08-30T04:24:02Z")
You mean this actress, I presume…? **Best movies of Julianne Moore** _Boogie Nights_ Den mother to… porn actors?!? _Game Change_ Made a great Sarah Palin _The Big Lebowski_ Maude is role of lifetime Next up: **Great actor or actress; sucky movie** ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2026, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3298 "2026-08-31T13:43:22Z")
_The Island of Dr. Moreau_ Brando’s legendary half-assing on display. _Cats_ Roster of greats, trash movie. _Battlefield Earth_ Travolta’s Scientology fetish comes through. **FIlms with religious (not necessarily Christian) whackadoodles** ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2026, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3299 "2026-09-01T18:37:53Z")
**FIlms with religious (not necessarily Christian) whackadoodles** _Airplane_ Kramer takes on airport fanatics _Midsommar_ Swedish commune is pagan cult _Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom_ Temple tunnels contain Thugee thugs Next: **Movies featuring heroes with unique weapons** ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2026, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3300 "2026-09-02T01:59:59Z")
_Django (Not the Tarantino one)_ Casket hid a Gatling gun _Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome_ I liked the boomerang kid! _Premium Rush_ His bike WAS a weapon! **Movies with style but no substance** ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2026, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494/3301 "2026-09-03T14:01:16Z")
_Tron Legacy_ Long Daft Punk music video. _Speed Racer_ Made some viewers quite dizzy. _Neon Demon_ Imagery, cinematography eclipse the narrative. **Movies that get in your head and make you think about stuff** [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494.md?page=164) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/five-word-movie-review/680494.md?page=166)