# Flatulent Office Mates **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 8, 2014, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652 "2014-07-08T17:38:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f6c823/32.png) [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absinthe_Anecdote)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/1 "2014-07-08T17:38:00Z")
Has anyone ever worked with someone who is chronically flatulent? Perhaps the worst type of these people are the ones who get some perverse enjoyment from making others suffer. I worked with a body builder guy who was always drinking gallons of creatine and stinking up the office. He’d laugh and seemed generally pleased when the rest of us were cursing him and gasping for fresh air. Once, we had a trip to the West Coast for a conference and our whole section was booked on the same flight. Word got out that a couple of the guys were planning on eating a bunch of baked beans the night before to make Mr. Creatine suffer. Not to be outdone, Mr Creatine ingests some concoction of baking soda and some type of beans & cheese mix before boarding the flight. I was about three rows back from them and couldn’t really smell anything, until for some reason, they decided to join forces against me, and started alternately coming back to my seat to let rip. I was so damned mad at first, but I eventually got the giggles at the absurdity of the situation. I got revenge on them later, but that’s another story, what’s yours? ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/2 "2014-07-08T17:40:24Z")
Maybe you should try working with grownups. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/3 "2014-07-08T17:50:36Z")
Sounds like your trip was a real gas ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/4 "2014-07-08T17:57:47Z")
All those buoyancy shifts could have endangered the plane. ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/5 "2014-07-08T18:01:52Z")
Ladies and Gentlemen, the pilot has turned on the No Farting sign, so please jam a cork in it. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/6 "2014-07-08T18:11:21Z")
I played in an orchestra pit right next to an unusually flatulent girl. EWW. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/7 "2014-07-08T18:16:55Z")
Here is a relevant scene from Dead Like Me: [George has to interview a flatulent man](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKPs9Cux7oo). ---
**Author:** ![Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f6c823/32.png) [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absinthe_Anecdote)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/8 "2014-07-08T18:18:15Z")
> [@EmilyG](#): > > I played in an orchestra pit right next to an unusually flatulent girl. EWW. I’ve got to ask, which instrument did she play? ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/9 "2014-07-08T18:22:03Z")
> [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](#): > > I’ve got to ask, which instrument did she play? Tuba. The conductor kept complaining about her adding notes that weren’t in the score. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/10 "2014-07-08T18:24:48Z")
Amazing thread! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/11 "2014-07-08T18:35:02Z")
I am the flatulent office mate. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/12 "2014-07-08T18:39:11Z")
I bring my 3 dogs to work with me everyday. One woman brings her two dogs and another woman brings one dog. When there is flatulence the dogs _always_ get blamed.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/13 "2014-07-08T19:43:48Z")
I work with an older woman whose ass is always leaking. I don’t smell it much, thankfully. I just hear blurpblurpblurp about 10 times a day. Reminds me of my grandma at Walmart when I was a kid. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/14 "2014-07-08T20:20:40Z")
“The wise man breaks wind and is gone” ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/15 "2014-07-08T20:23:51Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > “The wise man breaks wind and is gone” I must add that to my collection which includes the gem: “He who casts no shadow knows no shame.” ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/16 "2014-07-08T21:02:04Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > “The wise man breaks wind and is gone” The wise man’s fear is the name of the wind? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/17 "2014-07-08T22:00:32Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > The wise man’s fear is the name of the wind? Yes. Fortunately both the wind and the fear can be contained by doors of stone. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cyros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Cyros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyros)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/18 "2014-07-08T22:15:12Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Yes. Fortunately both the wind and the fear can be contained by doors of stone. > 😃 No wonder we are all eagerly anticipating The Doors of Stone. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2014, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/19 "2014-07-08T22:23:55Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > The wise man’s fear is the name of the wind? And all this time I thought it was Maria. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2014, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652/20 "2014-07-09T00:19:18Z")
> [@Absinthe\_Anecdote](#): > > I’ve got to ask, which instrument did she play? Viola. I was playing the viola part too, on my clarinet, which is why I was sitting there. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/flatulent-office-mates/692652.md?page=2)