# For Men Only (WAY WAY TMI) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 14, 2002, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677 "2002-11-14T05:02:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/21 "2002-11-14T19:31:32Z")
You know those impact craters on the moon… they’re not from meteorites. ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/22 "2002-11-14T19:37:32Z")
'Twas last week in the middle of the night, Holding back with all of my might. As the moment approached, I yelled “Back off, let it go.” Everyone thinks that that hole is a skylight. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/23 "2002-11-14T21:35:40Z")
Remember when Jupiter was hit by a “comet”? That was no comet. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/24 "2002-11-14T21:41:17Z")
Remember when Jupiter was hit by a “comet”? That was no comet. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/25 "2002-11-14T22:08:59Z")
Ever hear of the Tunguska Explosion? ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/26 "2002-11-14T23:32:58Z")
My ejaculations disturb the hamster from hundreds of miles away! ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/27 "2002-11-14T23:41:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eidolon909 \* > \*\*…a week or more of abstaining. \*\* Sorry, dude. That’s a long time. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/28 "2002-11-14T23:51:38Z")
Hey, at least I didn’t shoot the deputy;) ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/29 "2002-11-14T23:58:35Z")
Ah… sometimes I just barely get a trickle, other times I generate enough force to propel myself into orbit. That’s why I’ve taken to masturbating lying on my back, so the planet can keep me from attaining escape velocity. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/30 "2002-11-15T00:02:00Z")
Hmmm…maybe we should set up some sort of formal competition… Well, it would be more fun to watch than a pissing contest! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/31 "2002-11-15T00:02:26Z")
Mine just oozes out the end, but it does so in such a powerful, forceful manner that it is truly a fearsome sight to behold. ---
**Author:** ![rostfrei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7bcc69/32.png) [@rostfrei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rostfrei)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/32 "2002-11-15T00:16:22Z")
I was out in the woodshed jerkin the gherkin one day when I shot and maimed my dog Rover, who followed me everywhere. To this day, all I have to do is drop my pants and he heads for the hills with his tail between his legs. Dogs never forget. ---
**Author:** ![NardoPolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecae2f/32.png) [@NardoPolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NardoPolo)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/33 "2002-11-15T00:53:18Z")
Way to compensate, **Giraffe**. I know my gf always had a stuffy nose when we were finished. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/34 "2002-11-15T01:04:07Z")
Well, I’m pleased to say I once proved the universe is curved, because it returned. By the way, Lee? You paint a stimulating picture. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/35 "2002-11-15T01:33:17Z")
I have taken to chaining my wife’s feet to the bedposts. Nothing kinky, it just stops her from banging her head on the wall when The Moment arrives. Unfortunately, the chaining takes longer than reaching The Moment. Regards, Shodan My wife says I am a terrible lover. I say, such an important decision should not be made in less than twenty seconds. I know I should preview this, but then I would never post. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/36 "2002-11-15T02:18:23Z")
I had a chance to visit Yellowstone Park a few years ago. Everyone got all excited, they thought a new geyser was discovered in the middle of a campground. It started with a rumbling deep below. The deer in the nearby meadow stopped and looked. Bears turned and ran in fear. Other small animals fled for their lives. The eruption happened right where a middle aged couple were camping. The hot shower blew skyward, well over 500 feet. The tattered remains of a tent bounced on top of the fountain. For what seemed like many minutes, the plume rose skyward. It finally died down, a few last blasts expelled skyward. Amazingly, the couple were still alive. He was laying in an air mattress, the seams blown apart like a cheap balloon. He had on no pants, She was kneeled before him, her hands near hiding his manhood from the gathering masses. Both had smiles on their faces as if something special had just happened. Old Faithful was very jealous. ---
**Author:** ![jmpride62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c37758/32.png) [@jmpride62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jmpride62)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/37 "2002-11-15T02:28:16Z")
\<---- responsible for the hole in the ozone layer! ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/38 "2002-11-15T02:30:33Z")
E = mc[sup]2[/sup] Ejaculations = my coming squared Atomic energy ain’t got nuthin on me. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/39 "2002-11-15T03:06:08Z")
NASA had to give up its moon landing program when I couldn’t attain escape velocity anymore. Now I can only propel stuff into low earth orbit. ---
**Author:** ![Candid\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Candid\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candid_Sky)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2002, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677/40 "2002-11-15T03:10:03Z")
Wow, the visuals :eek: Ok, so more powereful equal more better? Yeah, I am a curious female. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-men-only-way-way-tmi/136677.md?page=3)