# For Women. Re: Gene Simmons' Tongue **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 13, 2008, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117 "2008-04-13T02:54:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/21 "2008-04-13T13:32:44Z")
I’ll just go against the trend and say I’m not about the tongue (and didn’t see the Tonight Show) - but I **do** think Gene Simmons is quite sexy. It’s the eyes, and the confidence. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/22 "2008-04-13T13:33:47Z")
I find it amusing that anyone would think that Gene Simmons gives great head. I don’t care about his physical attributes, that man is far too narcissistic to be any good in bed. And that’s disregarding the fact that he’s just, in my local vernacular, “wicked gross”. So, um… no. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/23 "2008-04-13T13:50:51Z")
He can bite me. I find him to be a narcissistic dullard. Jesus! What a bore. And all the big-tongued dexterity in the world can’t make up for that. ---
**Author:** ![Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a698b9/32.png) [@Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rascal_s_Mom)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/24 "2008-04-13T13:55:26Z")
[QUOTE=NajaNivea] **hurk** **hurka** Yeah, what **Naja** said. ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/25 "2008-04-13T13:55:31Z")
I dunno - Family Jewels is pretty funny. He keeps saying “I’m going to kill myself” when things go wrong. I think, deep down, he’s actually Woody Allen (in his Mia Farrow days). ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/26 "2008-04-13T13:58:28Z")
[QUOTE=DianaG] I find it amusing that anyone would think that Gene Simmons gives great head. I don’t care about his physical attributes, that man is far too narcissistic to be any good in bed. And that’s disregarding the fact that he’s just, in my local vernacular, “wicked gross”. So, um… no. [/QUOTE] Ditto. And an “ugh” thrown in for good measure. ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/27 "2008-04-13T15:12:21Z")
This is bad news for **Giraffe**. There goes his best pick-up line. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/28 "2008-04-13T15:36:28Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] He can bite me. [/QUOTE] You’d probably need some kind of antibiotic for that. Another vote for _ick_. Apparently, the women of the Straight Dope are not his targeet audience. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/29 "2008-04-13T15:42:08Z")
um, no. Eons ago when I was extremely young and naive, a guy I knew in the navy told me he could lick his eyebrows. I didn’t get his meaning. (yeah, I was dumb) And thinking back on it, I can’t imagine that being a turn on. ---
**Author:** ![FarmerChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@FarmerChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarmerChick)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/30 "2008-04-13T16:38:31Z")
He is a dirty man, and not in a good way. So count me in the Hell No! column. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/31 "2008-04-13T17:39:31Z")
Well, Shannon seems happy after all these years. But on behalf of normally endowed gents everywhere, we want to thank Gene’s tongue (and Ron Jeremy’s schwang) for being associated witha man who apparently does not impress the average female that much… 😉 [QUOTE=fessie] I dunno - Family Jewels is pretty funny. He keeps saying “I’m going to kill myself” when things go wrong. I think, deep down, he’s actually Woody Allen (in his Mia Farrow days). [/QUOTE] Y’know, seeing the frontman of KISS play a neurotic putz who deliberately affects a character of “public superstud that’s ‘whipped’ at home”, is funny. But it confirms my reaction back in the 80s when they took off the makeup: Um, no, guys, as “normal” people it’s no fun. ---
**Author:** ![drpepper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@drpepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drpepper)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/32 "2008-04-13T17:51:06Z")
[QUOTE=Le Ministre de l’au-delà] August Innclinger is the best I’ve come up with so far, but I’ll keep you posted. [/QUOTE] Heh. August Innclinger. We have GOT to start using that as a Doper in-joke / meme, somehow. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/33 "2008-04-13T17:58:28Z")
I knew what I was going to post here before I even read the OP. The answer is NO. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/34 "2008-04-13T19:09:08Z")
Jeebus, no. First of all, it’s attached to Gene Simmons. Second, it’s completely freakish. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/35 "2008-04-13T19:18:09Z")
Maybe the question could be restated. If your SO could had Simmons-like tongue inserted to replace the original, would you find that an additional turn-on? ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/36 "2008-04-13T19:20:13Z")
Still no. See point the second in my post. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/37 "2008-04-13T19:25:50Z")
Sometimes, when I find myself in need of a boost to the ole libido, I tell myself that it’s actually [Jean](http://www.imdb.com/media/rm745052160/nm0001739) Simmons who has the unusually large and dexterous tongue. Something about that demurely pretty English rose’s delicate, sculpted lips concealing such a glistening musclebound sea-monsterish appendage is…giggity. ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/38 "2008-04-13T20:16:19Z")
Where’s the Barfy smiley when I really need it? Gene Simmons’ tongue has all the charm of a geoduck and I wouldn’t let the damned thing anywhere near me–even if it were attached to George Clooney I don’t think I’d like it much. I mean, really, how yucky must it be to French kiss somebody with a gigantic prehensile tongue? _shudder_ Kinda like kissing a German shepherd or something like–and we’ll have no “peanut butter/nap/all of a sudden” type stories here, thankyewverymuch! ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/39 "2008-04-13T20:17:21Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] Maybe the question could be restated. If your SO could had Simmons-like tongue inserted to replace the original, would you find that an additional turn-on? [/QUOTE] Hell no. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2008, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/40 "2008-04-13T20:39:17Z")
[QUOTE=JRDelirious] Well, Shannon seems happy after all these years. But on behalf of normally endowed gents everywhere, we want to thank Gene’s tongue (and Ron Jeremy’s schwang) for being associated witha man who apparently does not impress the average female that much… 😉 Y’know, seeing the frontman of KISS play a neurotic putz who deliberately affects a character of “public superstud that’s ‘whipped’ at home”, is funny. But it confirms my reaction back in the 80s when they took off the makeup: Um, no, guys, as “normal” people it’s no fun. [/QUOTE] My son’s ex-GF used to tutor Gene and Shannon’s kids. She said he as actually pretty normal around the house. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117.md?page=3)