# For Women. Re: Gene Simmons' Tongue **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 13, 2008, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117 "2008-04-13T02:54:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![RiverRunner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/977dab/32.png) [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/81 "2008-04-14T18:18:32Z")
[QUOTE=Le Ministre de l’au-delà] August Innclinger is the best I’ve come up with so far, but I’ll keep you posted. [/QUOTE] How long before we see a Doper with that as a user name? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/82 "2008-04-14T18:29:15Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] I must admit to curiosity about how you learned these details. [/QUOTE] Someone posted it on some celeb gossip site-I can’t remember which one. [QUOTE=The Flying Dutchman] 1. Women are not turned on by Gene Simmons. (except **Fessie** and **Guinastasia** ) [/QUOTE] Um, no. Hell no. Eeewwww. Where the hell did you get THAT idea? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Universe\_Lashes\_Out](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8797f3/32.png) [@The\_Universe\_Lashes\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Universe_Lashes_Out)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/83 "2008-04-14T18:53:44Z")
[QUOTE=The Flying Dutchman] Well, what have I learned from all this ? 1. Women are not turned on by large and dextrous tongues 2. Women are not turned on by Gene Simmons. (except **Fessie** and **Guinastasia** ) 3. And given the volume and speed of the replies to this OP, women are inclined to respond regarding Gene Simmons. Not sure what that means though. [/QUOTE] 4. Gene Simmons has slept a ton of women. 5. I think some of these “Eww, Gene Simmons, no way, gross!” posts are protesting a little too much. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/84 "2008-04-14T19:40:45Z")
I can’t think of any appendage that I’d take the outrageously huge version over the average-sized version. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/85 "2008-04-14T20:50:15Z")
[QUOTE=TroubleAgain] I don’t think the phrase “morally flexible” came across a you intended. 😉 I read it as having flexible morals, rather than as being flexible in a moral way. 😃 [/QUOTE] No, you’ve got it right. 😃 Robin ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/86 "2008-04-14T22:48:33Z")
[QUOTE=AudreyK] I can’t think of any appendage that I’d take the outrageously huge version over the average-sized version. [/QUOTE] Is “bank account” an appendage? ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/87 "2008-04-15T00:33:47Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] Is “bank account” an appendage? [/QUOTE] There’s a joke here somewhere: Gene Simmons, tongue, bank account, assets, large, flexible, liquid. Ugh, time for the acid bath and brain bleach. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/88 "2008-04-15T00:48:10Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] Um, no. Hell no. Eeewwww. Where the hell did you get THAT idea? [/QUOTE] You declined to respond negatively like every other doper chick (except Fessie) in your previous post and offered us the inside information that Simmons has a sex tape. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/89 "2008-04-15T01:38:21Z")
[QUOTE=BACI] You know, don’t you, that by now this thread will have shown up on routine search, and that somewhere the Great Man himself is reading this… So at the risk of hijacking this thread, if the tongue doesn’t do it for you, perhaps a line of constructive feedback on how else His Geneness might shape himself into a from agreeable to the average lady Doper might be in order? (Not, of course, to imply that a lady Doper could _ever_ be average.) M [/QUOTE] Get a f\*\*\*kin hair cut. Then, try respect. For yourself as well as others. See how you do after that. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/90 "2008-04-15T02:37:11Z")
[QUOTE=AudreyK] There’s a joke here somewhere: Gene Simmons, tongue, bank account, assets, large, flexible, liquid. Ugh, time for the acid bath and brain bleach. [/QUOTE] Not to mention “deposits,” “withdrawals,” “joint accounts,” and “getting hosed” on [V.D.] “penalties”. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/91 "2008-04-15T02:38:03Z")
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. _goes to scrub_ ---
**Author:** ![Mrs\_Johnson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@Mrs\_Johnson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs_Johnson)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/92 "2008-04-15T02:55:20Z")
Ew - that’s not attractive. Especially not attached to Gene Simmons. Nothing about him is attractive. Has anyone else noticed that the back of his tongue always looks whitish and dirty. Buy a tongue scraper! Ick! ---
**Author:** ![lizardling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f4b2a3/32.png) [@lizardling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lizardling)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/93 "2008-04-15T03:30:35Z")
Yuck. No. No no no no noooooo. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/94 "2008-04-15T05:19:48Z")
No. Nope. Nyet. Non. Que no, vamos. In how many languages does “no” mean “no”? ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/95 "2008-04-15T05:34:05Z")
I don’t find the idea of an extremely dexterous tongue gross. There’s some pictures of the [Joker](http://pics.livejournal.com/lovedatjoker/pic/0000tg8w/g10), grrrrowl! 'Course most of them he’s also holding a gun (um, a literal gun, just to be clear) Gene Simmons on the other hand? Ancient, creepy, ugly, and slimy. But I’ll listen to his music. If it was David Bowie? His music bores and occasionally annoys me (sorry), but I’d do him. And now you all know way more about me than you ever wanted to. ---
**Author:** ![Pollux\_Oil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/858c86/32.png) [@Pollux\_Oil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pollux_Oil)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/96 "2008-04-15T05:39:47Z")
I have a friend who has a tongue like Gene Simmons’. At all of those stupid “give one fact about yourself” meetings that we had to do at college, he would always demonstrate his abnormally long and flexible tongue. Invariably, there would always be at least one girl in the group that would make some sort of lewd comment about it. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/97 "2008-04-15T05:42:27Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] Maybe the question could be restated. If your SO could had Simmons-like tongue inserted to replace the original, would you find that an additional turn-on? [/QUOTE] Not if he liked to wag it… I just find waggers terribly creepy. Mind you, most of the ones I’ve seen in person were either calling a woman (sometimes me but not always) “sweet piece of cunt,” tailing my car too closely, or trying to grope someone who clearly didn’t want to be groped by them. There’s guys who make my uncle’s old dog seem like a nice, handsome gent - and I’m talking about one of those dogs whose main differences with a floor mop are that the mop has a handle and doesn’t try to hump everything in sight. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/98 "2008-04-15T07:21:47Z")
Blech!!! ---
**Author:** ![slanted\_zipper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/977dab/32.png) [@slanted\_zipper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slanted_zipper)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/99 "2008-04-15T08:19:08Z")
[QUOTE=Zeldar] This just has to be the subject of a new thread: Doper Women: Who is less appealing than Gene Simmons? (I hope Richard is in the voting 🙂 ) [/QUOTE] I don’t actually think a thread like that would get any replies! ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2008, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117/100 "2008-04-15T10:27:52Z")
[QUOTE=HowieReynolds] 4. Gene Simmons has slept a ton of women. 5. I think some of these “Eww, Gene Simmons, no way, gross!” posts are protesting a little too much. [/QUOTE] 1. Gene Simmons **claims** to have slept with a ton of women. 2. If that is true, it probably happened before many of us were born. Contrary to what Hollywood has led many to believe, not all of women are secretly hoping to get sexed up by AARP members. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/for-women-re-gene-simmons-tongue/445117.md?page=6)