# Forward, March (minirants) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 1, 2017, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131 "2017-03-01T20:24:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2017, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/181 "2017-03-30T16:51:20Z")
And…nope. Max ate all the tuna except, of course, for the bit that hid the pills. :headdesk: Called the vet. Can’t soak them, can’t crush them. I’m torn between trying something else and saying forget it. He needs these meds but at the same time we’re stressing him out trying to entice him to take them. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2017, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/182 "2017-03-30T19:32:35Z")
Chocolate starfishes who throw random trash into my compost bin can go to hell. (I wasn’t sure whether the plural of “starfish” was “starfish” or “starfishes” in this particular case. I know “starfishes” isn’t a word, but I wanted to show the phrase was plural.) ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2017, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/183 "2017-03-30T21:25:19Z")
> [@kiz](#): > > And…nope. Max ate all the tuna except, of course, for the bit that hid the pills. > > :headdesk: > > Called the vet. Can’t soak them, can’t crush them. > > I’m torn between trying something else and saying forget it. He needs these meds but at the same time we’re stressing him out trying to entice him to take them. Will he catch a treat in his mouth if you toss it to him? ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/184 "2017-03-31T00:31:56Z")
[QUOTE=GuanoLad] One day I would like to experience rich people’s problems. [/QUOTE] [QUOTE=digs] One day I’d like to experience poor people’s problems. [/QUOTE] And that, dear readers, was the start of “The Prince And The Guano”, a Twain-esque adventure that started on the SDMB, but quickly became a classic children’s book and a major motion picture. Seriously, I could’ve been rich. My Ultra-Rightie CEO “peer group” meant that there was at least one girlfriend who, if I’d married her, would’ve meant I’d have only Rich People Probs by now. But I’d gotten religion (seriously, started reading that Bible thang and ended up almost as liberal as YHWH or his kid). And “foolishly” 🙂 chose to reject all that, work like a dog 60 hrs a week, and fall for a working class girlfriend/now wife). Oh, my best friend fell for that rich girlfriend, got to work a lot less (for her family’s company), and retired early with two homes and a sports car. Now, HOW many days til that next paycheck? Ahhh, real life problems! ---
**Author:** ![JcWoman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jcwoman/32/2889_2.png) [@JcWoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JcWoman)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/185 "2017-03-31T16:36:54Z")
> [@Nawth\_Chucka](#): > > Will he catch a treat in his mouth if you toss it to him? Even if he does, he’s likely to immediately spit it out. Dogs aint dum. (After honing the fun game of “catch” with my dog for a few years, one day I got the “bright” idea of tossing a little stuffed toy at her exactly like I did with treats. She caught it and spit it out with a “what the hell…?” look on her face. Another time I was tossing treats to our new boy who was also an ace catcher. Somehow I managed to get one straight down his throat, nearly into his windpipe, as evidenced by scary sounding coughing. I almost had to do doggy Heimlich.) ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/186 "2017-03-31T18:22:19Z")
> [@kiz](#): > > Dear Max Dog… We had a very picky dog who was near impossible to pill. As soon as he detected a pill, he would go on hunger strike for that particular food / snack indefintely. What worked is we found he had about a 6-element memory limit for food-pill association, so we had a standard daily rotation: Peanut butter Cheese ball Pill Pocket Treat Wonder bread ball Hot dog Salami And then back to step one again. Unless maybe that was his cunning plan all along, to get lots of different yummy treats…hmmm… ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/187 "2017-03-31T20:02:42Z")
> [@GargoyleWB](#): > > We had a very picky dog who was near impossible to pill. As soon as he detected a pill, he would go on hunger strike for that particular food / snack indefintely. What worked is we found he had about a 6-element memory limit for food-pill association, so we had a standard daily rotation: > > Peanut butter > Cheese ball > Pill Pocket Treat > Wonder bread ball > Hot dog > Salami > > And then back to step one again. Unless maybe that was his cunning plan all along, to get lots of different yummy treats…hmmm… Wouldn’t put it past him, LOL. The weird thing is that appetite loss is a common side effect with this particular medicine, but it apparently doesn’t extend to treats. What worked this morning was a ball of wet dog food, not the stew kind, but the pate kind. As soon as I opened the can he was at my legs like a cat. Turned my back, quickly made a ball-with-pills, and gave it to him. No mess, no fuss. However, I won’t breathe easier until he does the same tonight. And tomorrow. And the day after tomorrow, etc., etc. I did buy a can of salmon as a backup. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/188 "2017-03-31T21:35:09Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Oh, no you do matter: your posession by cats and dogs gives him a great reason to look at SHINY! With lots of LIGHTS! stuff that he wouldn’t be able to look at if it wasn’t for your critter-owners. Is now mollified. Doesn’t think this is the right place to mention the clear plastic with led lights sex toy he once gifted me, though. Kitchen is safe for now 🙂 So far, I’ve seen 2 of our cats using the new box. I’ve also seen another one flee the entire floor of the house when it cycled. The problem with self cleaning litter boxes is that they are plastic and metal. Cat pee is the most corrosive substance in the universe and if its mixed in with litter box dust, nothing will survive. If those digs (not the poster) about rich people’s problems were pointed my way, let me tell you that I’ve been living-in-my-car (with a cat and litter box on the passenger footwell) poor and now am comfortably middle class. I like this much better. I also want to say that marrying rich sometimes isn’t as easy as it sounds. First I had to befriend a traveling evil oil guy at work, accidently run into him again while killing monsters online, then I had to remotely infect the wife he was devoted to with a rare form of cancer to get her out of the way and comfort him. Next, I had to keep in almost daily contact with him for a few years and find a way to give him a heart attack which caused a quad by-pass. Finally, I had to fly to a different state and nurse him back to health before he would get the clue that I wanted to be written into his will. Most of this was done while we were thousands of miles apart. Isn’t the internet wonderful? ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/189 "2017-04-01T15:37:53Z")
Finally, FINALLY got Max to take his meds! Crossing my fingers that it’ll continue. He’s got one more week of 'em :crosses fingers: I don’t remember if I posted it upthread but on top of this whole doxycycline debacle Max also needs a tooth extraction. We’re saving up for it. In the meantime the list of what he will/can eat has shrunk between both issues. Raw eggs seem to be his go-to right now. He will eat it along with a bit of kibble, but the kibble can’t be too crunchy, of course. Has no interest in any kind of ground meat. He doesn’t like the texture of freeze-dried “raw” food like Honest Kitchen since this whole med thing started (he was fine with it before – go figure). I bought a can of stinky wet dog food, a brand I generally stay away from. Took a glump of it , rolled the doxy in it, and gave it to him, no problem. Ditto last night and this morning. I’m praying that he doesn’t figure it out. ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131/190 "2017-04-01T17:46:48Z")
It’s that time, people. 🙂 [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=20107499#post20107499](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=20107499#post20107499) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/forward-march-minirants/781131.md?page=9)