# Free usernames! First come, first served!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [July 31, 2011, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881 "2011-07-31T01:47:59Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/1 "2011-07-31T01:47:59Z")
I’m pretty much settled in as Mean Mr. Mustard; that is, I do not foresee changing my username at any point.
But I thought of another pretty good one that I would have strongly considered had it occurred to me back in the day.
And then I thought, why not offer up some clever unused usernames, free for the taking? Think of this thread as that box of stuffed animals at the garage sale that says “Free - one to a customer”.
So, let’s pay it forward. Drop your witty, unused, copyright-free usernames in this thread, and we will let anyone who cares to rifle through the box.
My first donation: **Jiminy Frickit**
mmm
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### Author:  [@Hypnagogic\_Jerk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypnagogic_Jerk)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/2 "2011-07-31T02:12:07Z")
I cannot believe that we still don’t have a [**Smok Wawelski**](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wawel_Dragon).
Also I really like the sound of **Khussar Iryston** ([South Ossetia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Ossetia) in Ossetic).
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/3 "2011-07-31T02:36:23Z")
**Crap Nelson**
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### Author:  [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/4 "2011-07-31T03:00:29Z")
\*\*The Czeck is in the Mall \*\*
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### Author:  [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/5 "2011-07-31T03:06:29Z")
Gilbert Grape
McKinley Morganfield
Jacque Pennei
Aubrey Hepburn
Smartha Spewart
Shawanda Dance
Fart Arfunkel
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### Author:  [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/6 "2011-07-31T03:07:44Z")
**Bigus Dickus**
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### Author:  [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/7 "2011-07-31T03:10:11Z")
**Jamaican Me Mad**
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### Author:  [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/8 "2011-07-31T03:12:24Z")
**That’s Hedly!**
**You know…Morons.**
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### Author:  [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/9 "2011-07-31T03:13:38Z")
I’ve always been partial to Czechnology.
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### Author:  [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/10 "2011-07-31T03:16:02Z")
**Gangrene Clitoris** was always my favorite. Also, **Blast Hardcheese** and all the other related porn-type silly names tha I don’t feel like “listbotting” here.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/11 "2011-07-31T03:30:48Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#):
>
> **Bigus Dickus**
Jesus Sam, that’s…Lady Boyish.
🙂
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### Author:  [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/12 "2011-07-31T03:32:40Z")
**The Fruit at the Bottom of the Bowl** (might suit a LGBT sci-fi nerd of a certain age.)
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### Author:  [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/13 "2011-07-31T03:48:52Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#):
>
> Jesus Sam, that’s…Lady Boyish.
>
> 🙂
He has a wife, you know.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/14 "2011-07-31T03:58:07Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#):
>
> He has a wife, you know.
Say what?
No, no, I don’t want to know.
I’m not listening…hmm hmm hmm, la la la!
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### Author:  [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/15 "2011-07-31T04:06:43Z")
**Froot Loops Milk**
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### Author:  [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/16 "2011-07-31T05:09:28Z")
Barbara Seville
.
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### Author:  [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/17 "2011-07-31T05:50:20Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#):
>
> **Froot Loops Milk**
Or **Hot Dog Water**.
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### Author:  [@AnalogSignal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnalogSignal)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/18 "2011-07-31T05:59:06Z")
All This and Nachos Too
Aesop’s Navel
The Disco Assassin
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### Author:  [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/19 "2011-07-31T13:06:47Z")
**Lickety Slit**
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### Author:  [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)
#### Post date: [July 31, 2011, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/free-usernames-first-come-first-served/590881/20 "2011-07-31T13:38:32Z")
**This Space For Rant**
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