# "Friendly" retailers make me stabby **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 27, 2011, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489 "2011-05-27T21:42:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2011, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/141 "2011-06-10T16:29:37Z")
> [@Zeriel](#): > > Welcome to the Dope. I’ll give you some free deadly neurotoxin in a bit. European crudites, eh? ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 11:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/142 "2011-06-14T11:42:52Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > By making a joke of it. Say your name is Dumbledore, or Michelangelo. > > That way you can release some of your hostility by being harmlessly snarky, and they may even laugh. Everyone wins. When on a family holiday to the US some years ago, my Dad gave his name to some poor Starbucks Barista as “ **ARTHUR, KING OF THE BRITONS** ” (He is neither Arthur, British, nor Royalty)- and duly received his Extra Big-Ass Coffee Beverage in a cup which had “Arthur” written on it, and was paged with “Coffee for Arthur!” when it was ready, by said hapless Barista who’d completely missed the joke. Which disappointed Dad, because as he said, “You’d think someone who worked in Starbucks would be a Monty Python fan. I bet he’s telling his mates that the King of England was in here buying coffee and wondering why no-one believes him.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/143 "2011-06-14T17:28:03Z")
Oh, damn, I would have LOVED that! I think my response would have been, “Well, _I_ didn’t vote for you!” ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/144 "2011-06-14T17:39:47Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > You haven’t been back to Red Lobster because of _aggressive greeting_? I can’t fathom this. > > The reason you shouldn’t go back to Red Lobster is because the food is crap.Once Mrs. J. and I were eating at one of those Texas roadhouse kind of places (this one was in West Virginia). As we were finishing our meal a bunch of waitstaff congregated nearby. Suddenly rancid country music began to blare from the loudspeakers and they all started doing a line dance in front of us and other shell-shocked customers. > > We escaped from the restaurant in time to avoid permanent psychic damage. That’d be the Texas Roadhouse, yup. I love the food there, but the fucking line dancing.. A local Hardee’s I eat at about once a week started having their employees address customers as ‘Dear’. I find assumed familiarity offputting in the extreme, so I filled out a comment card. (also complained about the Fox News blaring on the TV set..) It stopped for a while, but they’ve started that shit again.. ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/145 "2011-06-14T18:24:36Z")
> [@Dietrich\_K](#): > > Well, some of us actually _like_ getting a little extra bite of something for nothing. And even when we don’t want said freebie(s), we smile and say “no thanks”, and don’t bitch about it on an internet discussion forum, intimating that getting something, however small or trivial, for nothing is a _bad thing_. But you do bitch about people bitching on an internet forum, intimating that freedom of speech is a bad thing. Fascinating. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/146 "2011-06-14T18:29:29Z")
Here’s my theory. Stores cater to extroverts, who like fakey-friendly bullshit because it reaffirms their worldview and sense of self. It pisses off the introverts, but they don’t complain often, because … well, they’re introverts. ---
**Author:** ![Dietrich\_K](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@Dietrich\_K](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dietrich_K)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/147 "2011-06-14T20:32:02Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > Here’s my theory. Stores cater to extroverts, who like fakey-friendly bullshit because it reaffirms their worldview and sense of self. It pisses off the introverts, but they don’t complain often, because .. well, they’re introverts. Implied, sanctimonious, super-self-centered, stinking-slightly-of-martyrdom message: We introverts are so _totes_ better than those silly, stupid extroverts! (Oh, and for the record: Most, if not _all_ of the people who know me would much more readily classify me as an introvert than as the opposite. And yet here I am not posting tedious, self-important screeds about, oh gods, how simply _put_ upon I am by having to soldier on through each day, even as society at large wants to envelop me in ersatz bonhomie at nearly. Every. TURN. The … horror! The … horror!) ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/148 "2011-06-14T20:43:46Z")
I have begun, when I check out and they ask me, “Did you find everything you needed today?” answering honestly. If I did find everything I needed, so be it, I say so and say thanks. If not, then I tell them, “Actually, I was looking for X product, but it seems you don’t carry it, so I am going to go over to \_\_\_\_ to get it.” Either I get the cashier commiserating with me, or in some occasions, “Did you check Aisle 10?” And they find it for me, yay! ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2011, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/149 "2011-06-14T22:23:17Z")
> [@GargoyleWB](#): > > Welcome to the Straight Dope, FairyChatMom. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to assist, we have some very lovely specials going on today, including a ‘quick links’ tab, and a F.A.Q. That’s for _quoty finger motion_ “Frequently Asked Questions”. > > I love your dress! This cracked me up. **FCM** is a witty delightful brilliant person. Her husband’s no slouch either. Don’t ask about the cats. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2011, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489/150 "2011-06-15T13:00:56Z")
> [@Dietrich\_K](#): > > **Implied** , sanctimonious, super-self-centered, stinking-slightly-of-martyrdom message: We introverts are so _totes_ better than those silly, stupid extroverts! You misspelled ‘inferred’. I implied no such thing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/friendly-retailers-make-me-stabby/583489.md?page=7)