As a matter of fact, yes, I can. 
I can also build a pretty productive still out of lab equipment. And I have some small experience in canning veggies.
In which case Chicago comes back into play, what with its proximity to loads and loads and loads and loads of corn, and all the city resources and libraries and labs and such.
Chicago = snow, and winters that are colder than Anchorage. No freaking way, Jose!
California is God’s Country.
Just saying that there’s a hell of a lot of corn in the Midwest and that can provide a pretty nice ethanol supply if we can figure out how to use it. Not that we should live there, really, but that we should use that to our advantage if we can drive out that far from wherever.
So this brings us back to where are we all when the disaster happens.
All Dopers are gathered together.
- Is it by the divine power of the FSM or the IPU?
- Did we all attend a special party at the SD HQ to finally meet Cecil?
Option 1 would allow us to start anywhere, Option 2 would start us in Chicago.
If **SHAKES ** is willing to come back to this scenario, be the arbiter and declare a starting point, we’ll find a living spot from there.
Geez, this is like a dream scenario for me. I’ve been interested in all sorts of currently useless stuff for most of my life: medieval warfare, wilderness survival, low-tech engineering and crafts, martial arts, etc. For any post-apocalyptic survival scenarios I ever thought about, I pretty much assumed the worst–that I’d be completely on my own at first, fighting other survivors for supplies–so anything less than that would probably be cushy in comparison.
I could be a good scout and scavenger. I can teach unarmed and combat with non-firearm weapons. (I think we’ve got the firearm combat covered with people who are more qualified). I’m a good shot with a bow and was as good with a rifle or pistol, though it’s been years since I had a chance to practice with the latter. I know wilderness survival pretty well, though admittedly the closest I’ve had to come to testing it is on a couple of camping trips with minimal equipment. I used to be a decent tracker. I know a lot of edible wild plants that grow around northern California. I’m a bit of a natural loner anyway, so doing something by myself or a small band of partners would be pretty well suited to my personality.
Oh yeah, I can pick locks too. I have a decent mechanical and engineering aptitude, which of course means that I’m as good at finding weak points as I am at making sure something doesn’t fall apart or fall down easily. If one of the explosives experts on the board could instruct me and my boys, we could probably get into anything that was worth breaking into.
I’m a decent carpenter and woodworker who knows how to work with non-powered hand tools. I can fell, section, and split trees, having helped my dad as a kid. We did it with an axe a few times to see how hard it would be. Chainsaws are much faster and easier, but it can be done without one provided you don’t mind working hard. I know how to build survival and low-tech housing.
I can hunt and butcher animals. I learned how to ride and take care of a horse when I was a kid. I can make wine, though I think there are already brewers/vintners aplenty. I know the basics of blacksmithing, enough to set up a handmade forge, and I could probably make hand tools and knives with some practice. With the help of people with formal engineering and chemistry training I could cobble together a still. It’s for medicinal uses! 
I’ve done some glassblowing as well as pottery-making. I’ve made jerky and canned foods. I know how to reload ammunition.
My weak point is farming. I know only the basics from having been raised in a household that supplemented our diets with home-grown food. I know only the general stuff about fertilizing, composting, mulching, and the like. Most of what I remember is that farming sucks; it’s hard work and no fun, and the rewards are a long time coming. Raising animals is more fun in some ways, but ultimately it’s a shitty job as well (pun intended).
Anyone need a scout/scavenger/man-at-arms/craftsman/jack of all trades?
Your hired of course. All that wish to contribute should be welcomed I hope.
I would hope for a crash course to get my Archery back up. It has been over 15 years since I shot a bow and 18 for X-Bow.
Here is a link to Pasta’s thread on occupations
It seems pertinent.
I’m a traffic manager now, but I’ve worked in production and I’ve done some newswriting.
Never shot a crossbow, but I earned an archery medal in Boy Scout camp a while back. Whether I could shoot one now is questionable, but I’m sure I could pick it up again. I wasn’t good enough to hit a fly, but I could probably take down a cow given enough chances ;j
Well, the crossbow I shot was extremely easy to use. About 1/10 the skill required by a bow. More like a very slow to load gun from what my friends have told me. I was never great with the bow but I could hit the target well from 50’ out and occassionally from 100’. So those cows are in a lot of trouble if even if we run out of Gun Powder.
I’m a chemist. While I work with pharmacuticals and radioactivity, I could be convinced to make some Diet Dr. Pepper in exchange for some time with the Hospitatlity Crew. Plus I have that nice Boy scout back ground to help out in places and I can serve on the on-call group for emergancy first aid. Now I just need to train my dog to hunt…