# Fuck Kristi "Puppy Killer" Noem (descriptions of animal cruelty in OP) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Tags:** trump\ **Created:** [April 27, 2024, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808 "2024-04-27T00:22:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 38
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2025, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/741 "2025-06-18T22:37:36Z")
Maybe she got exposed to the supersecret alien zombie flesh eating brain worming rage virus, and they are trying to contain it. But this is just the opening scene in the movie _47 Days, Later!_ Soon, all of America, then all the world, will be affected. Life as we know it will come to a crunchy end. Or she’s just trying to avoid testifying before congress. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2025, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/742 "2025-06-18T22:40:18Z")
There are days when I really wish that guy was Liam Neeson… \< CLUE Player \> “It’s Liam Neeson, with a Laptop, in a Pub in Ireland !” \< Game Master \> “You lose! Liam Neeson has never once Set Foot in a Pub in Ireland…” ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2025, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/743 "2025-06-18T22:50:30Z")
> [@Sherrerd](#): > > But from the fact that she was sent home the same day, I’m guessing that if there were any actual symptoms (other than the Cold Sweats at the thought of facing the press), they were minor. False assumption. I have had two instances of anaphylaxis, that is, allergic shock, that sent me to the ER. Fortunately, I got there soon enough that it was brought under control without needing to admit me, but they were both truly life-threatening reactions. The fact that I was able to go home within 6 hours of landing in the ER (full of pharmaceuticals) in no way negates the fact that, had those episodes been untreated, I probably would have died. So, much as I hate and loathe Kristi Noem I would not make the assumption that her reaction was fake based solely on the amount of time she was in the hospital. And I encourage you to not make that assumption based solely on the time stamps on her presence in the hospital. Other juicy tidbits indicating this was a false alarm are another matter, but I’d prefer cites for them. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2025, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/744 "2025-06-19T00:51:48Z")
> [@bobot](#): > > > [@Yllaria](#): > > > > I thought I found an article with a symptom listed. But then I noticed the Onion logo. Darn. > > Let’s have it! I hadn’t clicked on it. Turns out it was just a picture with a headline. Headline is in the link. [Allergic Swelling Leaves Kristi Noem’s Face Completely Recognizable - The Onion](https://theonion.com/allergic-swelling-leaves-kristi-noems-face-completely-recognizable/) ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2025, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/745 "2025-06-19T01:20:32Z")
Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2025, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/746 "2025-06-19T13:10:30Z")
> [@Section\_Maker\_Jupe](#): > > Political Wire says she was visiting biohazard facility with JFK jr. Was it at the bottom of the Long Island Sound? ---
**Author:** ![scudsucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scudsucker/32/14101_2.png) [@scudsucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scudsucker)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/747 "2025-06-20T01:42:52Z")
I would think any place anywhere near RFK Jr. is a biohazard. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/748 "2025-06-20T02:23:11Z")
Question: If she dies, am I supposed to feel badly about it? In lieu of flowers, I’d prefer to make a donation to the ASCPA. Or send a card that said I did to make greedy MAGA goblins gnash their teeth. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/749 "2025-06-20T02:24:42Z")
I’d want BSL-4 equipment for myself, if I was in the same room with some of these people. The first report I saw implied that her allergic reaction was to lip fillers. That honestly wouldn’t surprise me. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanubv.2/32/3260_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUBv.2)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/750 "2025-06-20T03:09:33Z")
> [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](#): > > Question: > > If she dies, am I supposed to feel badly about it? > > In lieu of flowers, I’d prefer to make a donation to the ASCPA. > Or send a card that said I did to make greedy MAGA goblins gnash their teeth. Not whatsoever. On the same page with you, heroic friend. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/751 "2025-06-20T10:49:44Z")
> [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](#): > > If she dies, am I supposed to feel badly about it? I would, the next morning. Champagne gives me a hangover. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/752 "2025-06-20T15:58:23Z")
If she dies, will Kennedy be charged? “You see, Kristi, if you eat saw dust and rub rocks in your hair, you are immune to most diseases…” \< Hissing sound as he opens up a cannister that says ‘Ebola for Dummies’ \> (Maybe a 100 years from now we’ll find he lived because of ‘worm immunity’.) ---
**Author:** ![dasmoocher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@dasmoocher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dasmoocher)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/753 "2025-06-20T22:46:37Z")
> [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](#): > > (Maybe a 100 years from now we’ll find he lived because of ‘worm immunity’.) Brain worms, raw milk, swimming in sewage, etc–I’m thinking RFK, Jr could be like a real-life [Montgomery Burns from _The Simpsons_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Burns#:~:text=Burns%20has%20contracted%20every%20known,a%20slight%20breeze%22%20could%20upset): > …doctors at the [Mayo Clinic](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mayo_Clinic) discover that Mr. Burns has contracted every known human disease, as well as several that were discovered during his checkup, but that they have canceled each other out in a condition they call “[Three Stooges](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Three_Stooges) syndrome;” although a doctor warns him that his physical health is extremely fragile and that “even a slight breeze” could upset the balance between his diseases, Mr. Burns misinterprets his condition to believe that he is invincible. Video clip of the scene: [The Simpsons - Three Stooges Syndrome](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmBj8r1-fDo) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/754 "2025-06-20T23:13:25Z")
A copy of her 2022 autobiography found its way today into the library where I volunteer. I was tempted to put it in the fiction section, but I put it in the biography/history section anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/755 "2025-06-20T23:30:00Z")
> [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](#): > > If she dies, am I supposed to feel badly about it? I don’t celebrate any person’s death. But some, I grieve a lot less than others. (Oh, and I think you meant to say “feel bad”. If you “feel badly”, then that might be a symptom of leprosy.) ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/756 "2025-06-20T23:34:28Z")
RFKjr may be the true Kennedy Tragedy. God, I hope they lose his brain in a vat of neon green acid. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2025, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/757 "2025-06-20T23:54:22Z")
Spine inward, at least? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2025, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/758 "2025-06-21T00:14:01Z")
“I have never killed anyone, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction” – Clarence Darrow ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanubv.2/32/3260_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUBv.2)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2025, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/759 "2025-06-21T02:10:56Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I don’t celebrate any person’s death. Hurting / killing an animal for no good reason makes one irredeemable, imo. Top it off with all her other evil deeds and . . .well, I’m not allowed to say here. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2025, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808/760 "2025-06-21T02:42:07Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUBv.2](#): > > Top it off with all her other evil deeds and . . .well, I’m not allowed to say here. Exactly. You can spit on her grave IRL ( if you choose ) but don’t tell us about it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808.md?page=37) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-kristi-puppy-killer-noem-descriptions-of-animal-cruelty-in-op/1000808.md?page=39)