# Fuck My Knees! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 23, 2004, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625 "2004-09-23T04:24:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/1 "2004-09-23T04:24:00Z")
Both of them, fuck 'em both! Damned fragile, rusty, aching, breaking down pieces of crap! ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/2 "2004-09-23T04:39:18Z")
(avoiding the obvious octopus jokes) You a tall person? A Runner? Cause I have the torso of someone 6’ 4" but 28" legs. My old man had the same structure–odd-looking, but hard to knock down! Most of my frieds are tall like over 6’ and I swear they all have knee trouble. ME? No. Underevolved I guess. Well, I did sprain one once, but I was asking for trouble. Hurt. Like a shot to the pills only in my knee. What’d you do to yours? ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/3 "2004-09-23T05:12:23Z")
“Not everyone keeps their genitals in the same place, **Inigo**.” ---
**Author:** ![Dog80](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@Dog80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dog80)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/4 "2004-09-23T05:40:30Z")
Buy some rubber bands for your knees. Or start exersicing. I am over 6 feet tall and weigh over 300 pounds. My knees started hurting when I started running and doing squats and deadlifts (some 2-3 months ago). Now the pain has gone almost completely away despite the fact that I continue my training with the same intensity. Still, if I don’t warm up properly, my knees will give me a jolt of sharp pain, which is very annoying. ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/5 "2004-09-23T12:09:14Z")
I’m with Dog80. I was feeling rather creaky earlier this year, took up running (carefully) and doing squats and other leg-type exercises. Cleared my problems right up. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/6 "2004-09-23T12:11:48Z")
> [@Aesiron](#): > > “Not everyone keeps their genitals in the same place, **Inigo**.” :rolleyes: Duh! If we did they’d just get all mixed up! That’s why they’re not, dare I say it, _detachable_! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/7 "2004-09-23T12:17:59Z")
A skiing accident in high school tore up my right kneww and caused some nerve damage. _Exactly_ a year later I was in a head-on collision that broke my right femur at the knee and broke my left patella. Lost about 1/3 of my patella, and my left tendon. I hate my knees. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/8 "2004-09-23T12:55:22Z")
Can you get some new ones? ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/9 "2004-09-23T13:26:11Z")
I got crappy knees, too. Torn lateral meniscus in the right knee. Repaired medial meniscus and ACL in the left. I WOULDN’T recommend taking up running. That’s not a “knee-friendly” activity. Since my surgery (2.5 years ago), I’ve tried getting back into running several times (I used to be a good runner). Everytime I started getting intense, the knee would start swelling up. Now, I’ve been biking very regularly since about May of this year, and my legs felt the best they’ve felt since I injured the left knee. Biking can cause some problems, but no where near the type that running can. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/10 "2004-09-23T13:35:06Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > :rolleyes: Duh! If we did they’d just get all mixed up! That’s why they’re not, dare I say it, _detachable_! Fucked in the limb joints? That’s someone who can’t tell their arse from their elbow… ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/11 "2004-09-23T14:50:18Z")
Oh, it wasn’t “Fuck **MY** knees”, it was “ **FUCK** my knees”… …and I was about to suggest that you should make your request in my unusual fetishes thread in MPSIMS. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Elysian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@Elysian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysian)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/12 "2004-09-23T15:04:49Z")
Ahem _clears throat_ …Just how attractive are these knees, actually? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/13 "2004-09-23T15:36:20Z")
In March, I destroyed my ACL, LCL, meniscus, and other assorted bits of cartilege. Post-replacement, I went through a pretty heavy dose of rehab to get back to normal. Now, no knee pain whatsoever, no ill effects, nothing. A couple of the keys are stretching, a lot. And don’t just do the stretch where you bring your knee up to your butt. It feels great, but it’s not enough. Stretch the calves and the hamstrings. Pretty much, the rule is that if it attaches near the knee it also needs stretching. The most painful but best stretch I did was to lie on my stomach, attach a rubber band around my ankle and then pull the band over my shoulder. Another key: Keep the joint active. I could name about 30 different exercises I have done at various points of recovery. Some of the best, especially when swelling or pain was highest were riding a stationary back for 10 minutes, straight leg raises (front, back, and both sides) 1 legged squats, leg press, and various hopping moves. Good stuff. Oddly enough, blowing out my knee didn’t really hurt (that started the next day) but the sound really sticks with me. Imagine Thanksgiving dinner. You’ve been slaving in the kitchen all day. The turkey has been slow roasting and you have taken great pains to keep it well basted and simmering. It’s time to serve. This golden brown bird is ready. The smell is heavenly. Little Timmy reaches out for a leg and you hear the wet, sloppy snapping as he pulls the leg from the body. Yup, that was my knee. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/14 "2004-09-23T15:56:57Z")
Well, I know exactly what it was. I started running, doing all the stretching etc. And I didn’t overdo it, I eased my wayin. But still the pain came actually kind of suddenly. There are actually two “pains”, one right in the knee that the bands actually help me with and I could run with that pain. But then there is another inside the leg and below the knee cap that is much sharper. Identical in both knees. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/15 "2004-09-23T19:53:47Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > :rolleyes: Duh! If we did they’d just get all mixed up! That’s why they’re not, dare I say it, _detachable_! I’m guessing you missed the quotation marks in my post. Whoosh. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/16 "2004-09-23T20:27:43Z")
> [@Aesiron](#): > > I’m guessing you missed the quotation marks in my post. > Whoosh. Tell me the reference. “I _must_ know.” ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/17 "2004-09-23T20:33:53Z")
We construction types all have crappy knees. Concrete finishers, carpet guys, any trade that does a lot of knee work are usually cashed out by late 40’s. I have to use gel-filled knee pads and take breaks every hour or so, or I can’t continue to work. I have to wonder if this could be considered a repetitive stress related condition for fluffers. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tremorviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47774/32.png) [@tremorviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tremorviolet)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/18 "2004-09-23T21:02:09Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > (avoiding the obvious octopus jokes) > > You a tall person? A Runner? Cause I have the torso of someone 6’ 4" but 28" legs. My old man had the same structure–odd-looking, but hard to knock down! > > Most of my frieds are tall like over 6’ and I swear they all have knee trouble. ME? No. Underevolved I guess. Well, I did sprain one once, but I was asking for trouble. Hurt. Like a shot to the pills only in my knee. > > What’d you do to yours? Yeah, I’ve noticed this to. All my tall, lean runner friends? Nothing but knee problems. Me, with the short squatty legs? Knees of steel. There are advantages to piano legs… ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2004, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/19 "2004-09-23T21:07:05Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > Tell me the reference. > > “I _must_ know.” Get used to disappointment. 😉 I believe it’s a Star Trek reference. ---
**Author:** ![Dragonblink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Dragonblink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragonblink)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625/20 "2004-09-24T04:36:22Z")
I’m sure I’ve told the long and sordid tale of my bad knee here more than once – it involves injury, two dudes named Osgood and Schlatter, a cane, surgery, a discovery of morphine intolerance, a wheelchair, nerve damage, and lots of prescription anti-inflammatories and painkillers. And of course, once you’ve effed up your knee it’ll never be the same again. It’s a lot better since the surgery, but lemme tell you I never need to watch the weather channel to see if it’s gonna rain. My bad knee lets me know in advance, so I get to decide whether I want to limp with an umbrella or use my cane and get soaked. Yesterday I was driving home from the station and my knee decided, “You know what? This pushing the gas and brake pedals thing, I don’t like it any more. I’ma seize up and hurt like a bitch. Have fun in traffic.” You ever tried to drive left-footed? It ain’t as easy as it sounds. In conclusion, misbehaving knees are a circle of hell unto themselves. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-my-knees/265625.md?page=2)