# Fuck network TV. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 31, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926 "2004-05-31T15:35:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/1 "2004-05-31T15:35:25Z")
I know, i know, i should get cable. But i’m still pissed off. Today is the Memorial Day holiday, so i check out the TV guide to see which game of baseball to watch. Maybe my local CBS affiliate will show the Orioles taking on the Red Sox at Fenway, or maybe one of the other stations will have a National League game on. But what do i find in the guide? Nothing but the usual round of weekday crapola. There are essentially two choices, because the shows within each category are all pretty much interchangeable: daytime soaps (Days of Our Lives, All My Children, The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful, One Life to Live, As the World Turns, General Hospital) and faux courts (Judge Judy, Judge Mathis, Texas Justice, Judge Joe Brown, Divorce Court, Judge Hatchett). Christ, what a fucking depressing lineup. I’m surprised the suicide rate among those who are at home during the day isn’t about 95%. Of course, if you do off yourself, there’s always the option of actually appearing on daytime TV, courtesy of professional con artist John Edward. I never watch TV during the day, but it’s a holiday, and all i’m asking for is a game of baseball, or even a crappy movie. Pleeeeeeeeeease! ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/2 "2004-05-31T15:50:13Z")
Now you know it feels for non-sports fans on the weekends, when everything is NASCAR, baseball, football, golf, figure skating, and fishing. Do you realize how many people would riot if their “stories” were replaced with _baseball_? ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/3 "2004-05-31T15:56:59Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Now you know it feels for non-sports fans on the weekends, when everything is NASCAR, baseball, football, golf, figure skating, and fishing. > > Do you realize how many people would riot if their “stories” were replaced with _baseball_? You’re right about the weekends, of course. Even i think that the preponderance of “sports” on weekend television is annoying. ---
**Author:** ![LeeshaJoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@LeeshaJoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LeeshaJoy)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/4 "2004-05-31T16:36:36Z")
Or you could always, y’know, turn OFF the fucking TV and go outside for a while… ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/5 "2004-05-31T16:41:56Z")
OMG! A revelation! Daytime TV sucks! Who’d a thunk it? ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/6 "2004-05-31T16:49:53Z")
> [@LeeshaJoy](#): > > Or you could always, y’know, turn OFF the fucking TV and go outside for a while… Did you read what i wrote, dipshit? Or are you content to imply that i’m some sort of couch potato whose life revolves around the idiot box? As i said, i never watch daytime TV. However, today is a holiday, and it’s cool and raining outside, and i felt like watching some baseball. Period. I’m well aware of the option of turning the TV off; in fact, it’s off right now, and will likely remain that way for quite some time. > [@MLS](#): > > OMG! A revelation! Daytime TV sucks! Who’d a thunk it? I was actually aware that daytime TV sucks; i did not just make that discovery today. I was just hoping that the usual crap might be replaced with something better given that it’s a holiday. ---
**Author:** ![whistlepig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/73ab20/32.png) [@whistlepig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whistlepig)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2004, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/7 "2004-05-31T17:01:25Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > I know, i know, i should get cable. > I never watch TV during the day, but it’s a holiday, and all i’m asking for is a game of baseball, or even a crappy movie. Pleeeeeeeeeease! Nah, get a satellite dish. I don’t get ABC, NBC or CBS and don’t miss them a bit. Right now there are 10 movies and two different baseball games on. And two different Mexican soap operas. Mexican soap operas have the most beautiful women in the world. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/8 "2004-06-01T10:42:57Z")
> [@](#): > > And two different Mexican soap operas. Mexican soap operas have the most beautiful women in the world. Boy, you’re not just whistlin, piggie. Them are some **H** to the **O** to the **T** women. Wonder where they find 'em? ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/9 "2004-06-01T11:40:23Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > Boy, you’re not just whistlin, piggie. Them are some **H** to the **O** to the **T** women. Wonder where they find 'em? Um…Mexico? ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/10 "2004-06-01T11:44:36Z")
SciFi was running a marathon of _The Outer Limits_ yesterday. I TiVoed it. So now I have enough _Outer Limits_ episodes to last me a few weeks. Too bad most of them suck. 😕 :o :eek: :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Lockseer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a5b964/32.png) [@Lockseer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lockseer)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/11 "2004-06-01T12:38:19Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Christ, what a fucking depressing lineup. I’m surprised the suicide rate among those who are at home during the day isn’t about 95%. I was unemployed for close to a year, and one of the things that got me out of the house and to the gym nearly every day was this fact…but you forgot the third leg in the Triumverate of Daytime Television Torture: Reality Dating Shows: Elimidate! Fifth Wheel! Ex-Treme Dating! Blind Date! Shipmates! A Dating Story! ARGH! ---
**Author:** ![LeeshaJoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@LeeshaJoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LeeshaJoy)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/12 "2004-06-01T12:55:25Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Did you read what i wrote, dipshit? Or are you content to imply that i’m some sort of couch potato whose life revolves around the idiot box? You’re right. That was a cheap shot. I apologize. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/13 "2004-06-01T12:59:06Z")
> [@LeeshaJoy](#): > > You’re right. That was a cheap shot. I apologize. No problem. 🙂 I was even more annoyed at missing the baseball after finding out that the Orioles whipped the Red Sox 13-4. The Birds don’t do that very often, and i would have liked to see it. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/14 "2004-06-01T13:15:34Z")
> [@Lockseer](#): > > Reality Dating Shows: Elimidate! Fifth Wheel! Ex-Treme Dating! Blind Date! Shipmates! A Dating Story! Really? Around here, all the reality dating shows are on after 11.30 at night. And now a confession. While i think that Elimidate, Fifth Wheel, Shipmates, and A Dating Story suck big time, i still have something of a soft spot for Blind Date. It’s the only one of the shows that even approaches a real life situation, and i find Roger Lodge to be a rather engaging host. Also, the writers who do the bubble captions are pretty damned funny at times. My SO and i tend to watch the late local news at 11 and the BBC World News at midnight, and we often fill up the half hour in between laughing at some of the antics and idiocy on Blind Date. > [@whistlepig](#): > > And two different Mexican soap operas. I really wish we got some programming in Spanish around here. I like watching it because it allows me to work on my own Spanish comprehension. When we go back to my SO’s home town of San Francisco, there’s always a few channels to choose from, but we can’t get any Spanish language channels here in Baltimore. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/15 "2004-06-01T13:20:53Z")
Re: thread title There’s a Fuck Network? A Fuck Network? Why am I always the last to learn about these things? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/16 "2004-06-01T14:39:31Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > I know, i know, i should get cable. Then you’d start a thread titled “Fuck the cable company!” for various excellent reasons – including that, of the 70ish channels we get, there was NOTHING THE FUCK ON YESTERDAY. Daytime TV is a fucking joke, no matter if it’s network or otherwise. I’m tempted to get digital cable, but then I’d get a lot more channels, and there’d still be nothing on… ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/17 "2004-06-01T15:07:27Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > I was even more annoyed at missing the baseball after finding out that the Orioles whipped the Red Sox 13-4. The Birds don’t do that very often, and i would have liked to see it. So next time buy a ticket, ya cheap bastid! ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/18 "2004-06-01T15:24:37Z")
> [@whiterabbit](#): > > I’m tempted to get digital cable, but then I’d get a lot more channels, and there’d still be nothing on… That’s exactly the case. I have somewhere between 300-500 channels. Nothing on. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![chula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a4c791/32.png) [@chula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chula)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/19 "2004-06-01T16:53:45Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > While i think that Elimidate, Fifth Wheel, Shipmates, and A Dating Story suck big time, i still have something of a soft spot for Blind Date. It’s the only one of the shows that even approaches a real life situation, and i find Roger Lodge to be a rather engaging host. Also, the writers who do the bubble captions are pretty damned funny at times. I was thinking the same thing about Blind Date. I assumed it sucked ass for years, but then I watched it and discovered it could be pretty funny. They’re making fun of the losers who go on the show. Elimidate and Fifth Wheel are depressing. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2004, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926/20 "2004-06-01T23:22:46Z")
> [@Otto](#): > > So next time buy a ticket, ya cheap bastid! Easier said than done in this case. Firstly, i believe that Fenway Park was sold out a few days before the event. Secondly, and more importantly, Fenway Park is in Boston. I live in Baltimore. I’m afraid that my grad student stipend is not sufficient to allow me to fly to Boston just for a baseball game. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-network-tv/247926.md?page=2)