# Fuck off and die, Do-It-Yourself parking ticket writer **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 17, 2009, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397 "2009-09-17T02:30:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/141 "2009-09-19T15:06:45Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Oh, by the way, Mr. Retard, the attempted sentence: > > **Bullshit last-second desperate backpedaling is pathetic and fail.** > > . . . . . . . . would get an “F” in any Special Education class. Obvious Linguistic Noob is Obvious. ---
**Author:** ![Fantome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Fantome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fantome)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/142 "2009-09-19T15:16:17Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > When do I get credit for just parking far away from the store in the first place. “But what about all the good things Hitler did?” Yes, I know what you did was not on par with genocide, but when you pull some major asshole moves, don’t expect anyone to focus on something nice you did. And many here have already given you credit for parking far away. > [@](#): > > Now, if you are going to classify anyone that does a poor park job as a “retard” (a very offensive derogatory term for many families, may I add) This coming from the guy that not once in this thread said that he would take back going in a rage and challenging innocent people to fights? The same guy that said his parking from now on will ruin it for everyone else? Fuck off, retard. > [@Frylock](#): > > I don’t understand. Why not? Assuming what the OP says about how and where he parked, why is what he did wrong? Your anecdote seems irrelevant I think “Mike” was the one **villa** reported for taking up two spots, not the OP. It doesn’t sound like the anecdote was meant to be relevant to the OP other than sharing a story about lousy parking. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/143 "2009-09-19T17:05:34Z")
> [@irae](#): > > the **whale** > > I’ll harpoon you, **flense** your carcass I think there might be a book or a Halloween costume in there somewhere… ---
**Author:** ![UncleNito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7cd45c/32.png) [@UncleNito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleNito)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/144 "2009-09-19T17:49:53Z")
> [@Fantome](#): > > “But what about all the good things Hitler did?” [You didn’t.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin%27s_law) Way to ruin a perfectly nice pile-on 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/145 "2009-09-19T20:14:51Z")
> [@x-ray\_vision](#): > > You think the OP may be like these people?: > [www.peopleofwalmart.com](http://www.peopleofwalmart.com) Okay, this website made me stop surfing for porn for an hour. _::snerk::_ ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/146 "2009-09-19T20:43:06Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > Is Don King promoting you as an ‘Ignorance Fights Back’ contender or something? Sig worthy! ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/147 "2009-09-19T22:43:46Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > You are such an ass. How can it be a backpedal when I already admitted that I didnt take the time to check my parking job. When do I get credit for just parking far away from the store in the first place. > > Now, if you are going to classify anyone that does a poor park job as a “retard” (a very offensive derogatory term for many families, may I add) then I am going to suppose millions, and millions of Americans are as you say “retards”. > > Oh, by the way, Mr. Retard, the attempted sentence: > > **Bullshit last-second desperate backpedaling is pathetic and fail.** > > . . . . . . . . would get an “F” in any Special Education class. > > You can go home and cry to your mommy now. Shut the fuck up you redneck. ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/148 "2009-09-19T23:44:07Z")
> [@Michael\_Ellis](#): > > Shut the fuck up you redneck. Make me, fuckface. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/149 "2009-09-19T23:47:51Z")
The long awaited bout between our two newest assholes. I am divided as to whom I should put my money on. On one hand, **St. Anger** is likely a Metallica reference and you can’t go wrong by putting your money on a Metallica fan to kick some ass. But on the other hand, **Anger** is also the internet tough guy who drives his dick instead of uses it and then posts big mean messages on the internet to feel tough. And on the third hand **Michael Ellis** just seems to be a run-of-the-mill dickhead. I think I still gotta go with **St. Anger**. The bout will be taking place on his home ground after all, the internet. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/150 "2009-09-19T23:51:39Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > But on the other hand, **Anger** is also the internet tough guy who drives his dick instead of uses it and then posts big mean messages on the internet to feel tough. That remark would resemble 99.9% of the people that post insults on this board. They are all probably dweebs that wouldn’t dare call someone a retard or a dumb redneck to someone’s face, but they get the big muscles when they come on here. I’ve never encountered a bigger bunch of ignorant stupid fucking assholes and pussies in my life. People actually paid a subscription to read this shit? No wonder that went down the toilet. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/151 "2009-09-19T23:56:17Z")
Darmok on the Dope. Michael Ellis and St. Anger, when they crossed paths on the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/152 "2009-09-19T23:58:00Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > Clearly for your parents in particular. Right I’m retarded, but you can’t even spell “Jim”. You are an idiot and an ass, buzz off, punk. ---
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/153 "2009-09-20T00:00:16Z")
> [@Fantome](#): > > This coming from the guy that not once in this thread said that he would take back going in a rage and challenging innocent people to fights? The same guy that said his parking from now on will ruin it for everyone else? Fuck off, retard. Whatever you say there, Adolf. You are going to compare my parking job to killing 6 million Jews, then you are as a big an idiot as everyone else attacking me here. Think before you post, if your brain is capable of developing a thought, that is. Stupid ass. Who else wants some? ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/154 "2009-09-20T00:01:50Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Who else wants some? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Fantome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Fantome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fantome)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/155 "2009-09-20T01:35:00Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Whatever you say there, Adolf. You are going to compare my parking job to killing 6 million Jews Not at all, tardo. You said “When do I get credit for just parking far away from the store in the first place.” My response “But what about all the good things Hitler did?” is supposed to convey the message that people generally don’t talk about something good someone did when their assholish actions are what’s raising eyebrows, that is, for anyone smart enough to figure that out. For those that aren’t, I explained it in my next sentence: > [@](#): > > Yes, I know what you did was not on par with genocide, but when you pull some major asshole moves, don’t expect anyone to focus on something nice you did. But no, someone stupid enough just might think that I was trying to convey the message that lousy parking is on par with killing six million Jews. Nice job, Sparky. > [@](#): > > Who else wants some? Stop scaring us like that! You’re internet boldness is just overwhelming. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/156 "2009-09-20T02:05:54Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Who else wants some? I’ll play. St. Anger, while your conscientiousness in parking at the end of the parking lot is appreciated, your not parking within the pre-configured lines of the parking space is nonetheless viewed as either a sign of carelessness or lack of fundamental driving skills. As a result, your rant about the misguided “ticket writer” who thought they needed to needle you over your parking misfortunes has met with, how shall we say, less than unanimous support. Further, your posturing of being able to take on Dopers in a fight, while possibly true, has an unfortunate tone which does not demonstrate a willingness to be walking on the side of the angels. I therefore counsel you to consider whether your current methods of parking are in fact reflecting positively upon your character. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/157 "2009-09-20T02:06:39Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > That remark would resemble 99.9% of the people that post insults on this board. They are all probably dweebs that wouldn’t dare call someone a retard or a dumb redneck to someone’s face, but they get the big muscles when they come on here. I’ve never encountered a bigger bunch of ignorant stupid fucking assholes and pussies in my life. People actually paid a subscription to read this shit? No wonder that went down the toilet. But I needed to ‘cool my jets’? Hmmm. btw- You may not be aware of this, but you are giving anyone reading this thread the impression that you went page by page through at least one SDMB picture thread going “I can kick his ass!” _click_ “I can kick her ass"_click_"I can kick his ass!” _click_ “I can kick both their asses!” _click_ “I can kick her ass & the ass of the cat she’s holding!” _click_ “I can kick his ass and both those toddlers asses!” _click_ … Q: Is this really the image of yourself that you want to present? It would seem to be less ‘Metallica’ and more ‘REO Speedwagon’… ---
**Author:** ![UncleNito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7cd45c/32.png) [@UncleNito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleNito)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/158 "2009-09-20T02:12:24Z")
Is this really effective trolling? An epic flameout? Or is **St. Anger** just a really insecure pickup-truck owner with substandard driving skills? Four pages in, I still can’t figure it out. Every time it seems to be winding down, though, **St. A.** comes back and ratchets it up a notch, so I’m leaning toward the first one. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/159 "2009-09-20T02:47:43Z")
You people… The person who left the “ticket” was the asshole. If the parking was a real issue, the crybaby should’ve called the police, and if the officer didn’t laugh his/her ass off at the absurdity of how petty and nitpicky the asshole was being, he/she is the only one that should be writing a ticket. Crossing a parking line is only a problem in a full or nearly full lot. Anyone writing these bullshit tickets has far more issues than St. Anger here. Touching someone else’s property because they crossed some line without affecting anyone else, that’s a dickish thing to do. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2009, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397/160 "2009-09-20T03:16:03Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Who else wants some? Did you like my Bud Light commercial? P.S. Many thanks for the kind words to all who did, btw. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-off-and-die-do-it-yourself-parking-ticket-writer/510397.md?page=9)