# Fuck Vladimir Putin **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Tags:** ukraine-invasion\ **Created:** [March 1, 2022, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284 "2022-03-01T14:52:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/21 "2022-03-02T01:28:21Z")
> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#): > > I must admit I’d been rolling my eyes as the Biden Administration and the media began drumming about war in February, but now I see what they doing. They, IMHO, were trying to get ahead of any false narratives coming out of Russia and preclude any pretext for the invasion that Russia might’ve invented. IIRC, the administration was pretty explicit about that all along. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/22 "2022-03-02T01:52:38Z")
You must be telepathic. That’s almost word for word what I said to a friend on the commute home last night. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/23 "2022-03-02T01:56:22Z")
There, there. Sorry, but the actual expression is _Hear, hear_. The rest of your post is spot on. However, if you decide to say “jackass” instead of “horse”, you’ll be implying he rode in on the former guy. ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/24 "2022-03-02T03:39:15Z")
> [@This\_Just\_In\_2](#): > > And fuck the orange one too for sucking his dick the previous 5 years and helping to facilitate this war. -_checks forum_- Ahem, if he isn’t still sucking Putin’s dick, it’s only because he’s deepthroated all the way to the balls. I mean, with his tiny, tiny hands, he was having a hard time dealing with Putin’s massive hate erection. But seriously, you HAVE read the shit Trump has been saying about his favorite Pimp, right? ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/25 "2022-03-02T04:33:47Z")
Fuck this fucking fucker. Tell me, Vladimir Vladimirovich, what is it like to be always sure that you are awesome but also at the same time that there’s always someone out to get you and you must get them first? When you were starting up through the ranks, the thing had become that when you were no longer in charge you’d be quietly “retired” to a country dacha and put on a modest pension and nobody ever talked about/to you again. Now you’ve made it so that’s not an option… How well are you enjoying your loot? Do you expect to ever enjoy your loot? ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/26 "2022-03-02T05:37:14Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > How well are you enjoying your loot? Do you expect to ever enjoy your loot? If he doesn’t live to enjoy his loot, he can always leave it to his family. What? You never heard that Putin has family? He has one or more of wive(s), mistress(es), and some daughters. They are kept very much out of public view. Any reporters in Russia who dare to report, or even ask, about them can expect _consequences_. But someone(s) somehow manages to get at least a little Dope out on them. > **[20 Surprising Facts About Vladimir Putin's Family](https://www.therichest.com/lifestyles/20-surprising-facts-about-vladimir-putins-family/)** > > These facts show a side to Putin's family that most people never would have expected. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/27 "2022-03-02T08:14:32Z")
From article: > [@](#): > > He said during a press interview that “I am, of course, aware of the cliché that politicians live in glass houses,” Putin said, “but even in these cases, there must be some limits… I always disliked people who go around with their erotic fantasies, sticking their snot-ridden noses into another person’s life.” Aw, such a not-paranoid-in-the-least princess… The prurient press, purposelessly prying into their patriotic privations! The shmuck’s shitty at hockey. ^ IRT this last statement - if Putin read this thread, he’d take exception to that volley more than anything else here. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/28 "2022-03-02T08:25:48Z")
> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#): > > I really think that he thought the _Russia is for Republicans, Ukraine is for Democrats_ narrative he’s been cultivating had taken root, and that he would get a sizable portion of the Republican Party standing behind him. > > He’s still working on it, as I can tell by all the social media trolls screaming about George Soros. But this did not go down the way he thought it would. He forgot that Americans really love an underdog (so long as that underdog isn’t fighting America). ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/29 "2022-03-02T09:46:09Z")
Oh, I don’t know. If things keep going on their current track, he’ll be a shoo-in for Man of the Year. - Re unifying Europe around a common cause and a revitalized sense of identity, after years of drift and fragmentation - Turbocharging the long-dormant European project to properly develop their own continental military capabilities - Re energizing NATO as a critical stabilizing force - Significantly ramping up incentives for Western countries to fast-track renewable energy in order to disentangle themselves from distasteful petrostates - Similarly incentivized the West to stop ignoring the full-scale disinformation warfare being waged by Russian attackers and engage in real defense In 30 days Putin has done more to remind people of the need to safeguard democratic ideals than any other single person in years. Let’s give him a round of applause! (Edit to add: those were supposed to be bullets, and aren’t quotes. Weird formatting.) ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/30 "2022-03-02T14:59:49Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > There, there. Sorry, but the actual expression is _Hear, hear_ . DOH! Can you tell I have an engineering degree? I cannot believe I did that! 😞 ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/31 "2022-03-02T15:55:22Z")
Before you fuck Putin you gotta get the Jaws of Life to pry Donald’s tongue out of his ass. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/32 "2022-03-02T18:00:22Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > (Edit to add: those were supposed to be bullets, and aren’t quotes. Weird formatting.) Pro tip: Where you began each paragraph with \> put an \* instead. - Then you get bullets. ---
**Author:** ![Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiendish_astronaut/32/3295_2.png) [@Fiendish\_Astronaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiendish_Astronaut)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/33 "2022-03-02T18:02:02Z")
I heartily endorse this pitting and I’d like to add his puppet Lukashenko. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/34 "2022-03-02T21:18:16Z")
It occurs to me that the Russian oligarchs are criminals, and the heads of criminal organisations. Putin is hurting their livelihoods. I don’t know how it works in Russia, but I’ve seen The Godfather and how the Mafia took care of people who threaten their operations/cash flow. I’m not suggesting the oligarchs take one course of action or another, but they could probably guarantee the well-being of the families of any operatives that undertake a dangerous contract. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/35 "2022-03-03T19:08:29Z")
> **[A Russian businessman has put a $1 million bounty on Vladimir Putin's head,...](https://www.yahoo.com/news/russian-businessman-put-1-million-053413403.html)** > > Russian crypto investor Alex Konanykhin, who is based in California, told Insider the million-dollar bounty would come from his personal funds. > “I promise to pay $1,000,000 to the officer(s) who, complying with their constitutional duty, arrest(s) Putin as a war criminal under Russian and international laws…” ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/36 "2022-03-03T19:28:51Z")
Given the way the Ruble is tanking, a million US dollars will look better and better to anyone in Russia tempted to turn on him. If I can trust Google, right now that’s over 110 million Rubles, and if sanctions continue it will be worth even more later on. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/37 "2022-03-03T19:55:57Z")
I wonder what would happen if a bunch of rich Russians - ex pats or others - joined in on this, and the bounty for Putin at the international criminal court went up to … $10 million. $50 milllion… More? ---
**Author:** ![FlikTheBlue](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fliktheblue/32/10972_2.png) [@FlikTheBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlikTheBlue)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/38 "2022-03-03T19:58:48Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > [A Russian businessman has put a $1 million bounty on Vladimir Putin's head, calling for military officers to arrest him as a war criminal](https://www.yahoo.com/news/russian-businessman-put-1-million-053413403.html) > > > “I promise to pay $1,000,000 to the officer(s) who, complying with their constitutional duty, arrest(s) Putin as a war criminal under Russian and international laws…” > [@Atamasama](#): > > Given the way the Ruble is tanking, a million US dollars will look better and better to anyone in Russia tempted to turn on him. If I can trust Google, right now that’s over 110 million Rubles, and if sanctions continue it will be worth even more later on. > [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > I wonder what would happen if a bunch of rich Russians - ex pats or others - joined in on this, and the bounty for Putin at the international criminal court went up to … $10 million. $50 milllion… More? This type of thing seems like it would be a multi-person operation. I’d suggest $1 million per person that takes part rather than increasing the amount for any one individual. After all, if it’s just one person, they aren’t likely to survive, even if successful, and dead people can’t spend money. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/39 "2022-03-03T20:00:59Z")
> [@FlikTheBlue](#): > > I’d suggest $1 million per person that takes part rather than increasing the amount for any one individual. Yes this. $1 million per person for each person in a 50 person team. I think Putin would have to hide in a bolt-hole for months. ---
**Author:** ![teelabrown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/teelabrown/32/8412_2.png) [@teelabrown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teelabrown)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284/40 "2022-03-03T20:31:13Z")
A lot of people in Putin the Poisoner’s inner circle have access to Novichok. Just sayin’. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-vladimir-putin/960284.md?page=3)