# Fuck you Bárðarbunga **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 28, 2014, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715 "2014-08-28T02:19:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/41 "2014-08-30T14:21:11Z")
they should import some hula dancers. ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/42 "2014-08-30T16:46:44Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > The Pompeii affair was a complete cover up! (And don’t get me started on Herculaneum.) Krakatoa was a complete fraud … a publicity stunt concocted by the Dutch East India Company to spur investments from the rest of Europe. Doesn’t take much brown and grey spray paint to fool an eager audience. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/43 "2014-08-30T17:26:22Z")
What a hoot! Iceland calms down, and goddamn \*\*Papua New Guinea’s [Tavurvur](http://abcnews.go.com/International/papua-guineas-tavurvur-volcano-erupts/story?id=25171482)blows up. \*\* Wish I had just pitted big ass volcanoes in general now. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/44 "2014-08-30T18:06:26Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > Fuck you Bárðarbunga for not being able to spell your name with just regular letters! Bartharbunga if you want to skip those letters. ð is close enough to “th” in “this.” > [@Meurglys](#): > > Is this the Bárðarbungabunga party thread? Bárðarbunga for sleazy PM of Iceland! ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/45 "2014-08-30T22:23:28Z")
> [@watchwolf49](#): > > Krakatoa was a complete fraud … a publicity stunt concocted by the Dutch East India Company to spur investments from the rest of Europe. Doesn’t take much brown and grey spray paint to fool an eager audience. Indeed! The lies are obvious if you just look at a map. East of Java, my ass! ---
**Author:** ![fachverwirrt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/94ad74/32.png) [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2014, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/46 "2014-08-30T23:45:29Z")
It’s east if you go far enough… ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2014, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/47 "2014-08-31T04:45:07Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > Indeed! The lies are obvious if you just look at a map. East of Java, my ass! > [@fachverwirrt](#): > > It’s east if you go far enough… ♪ “[On we sweep with threshing oar our only goal will be the western shore!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sjNVDnkFkA)” ♫ ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2014, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/48 "2014-08-31T13:51:08Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > I pit Bardarbunga. With your [earthquakes](http://icelandreview.com/news/2014/08/27/big-earthquakes-indicate-volcanic-activity-underground) and your [giant ass cracks in the ice](http://icelandreview.com/news/2014/08/27/possible-eruption-under-bardarbunga). > > [You blow up](http://icelandreview.com/news/2014/08/27/hard-explain-what-happened-if-not-caused-eruption), then fuck you. You don’t ever get to that point, fuck you for the suspense. I’ve fucking had it with this shit. You can possibly shut down most of the NH air traffic, change the climate, turning the next winter into a nightmare beyond imagining, or just keep us all in suspense. > > I would say go to hell, but that would sort of be impossible, since you are a goddamn hole right into hell. > > Also I heard that if you really blow hard, it might wake me up from the goddamn boom. Calm the fuck down there big boy. Get a grip. As Pitting goes, this one is a [complete failure](http://news.yahoo.com/lava-erupts-iceland-volcano-131718635.html;_ylt=AwrSyCQyHwNUPzIA2zHQtDMD). It’s erupting right now and air traffic over New Hampshire hasn’t been interrupted, the climate is still hostile, next winter will be a nightmare well within imagining and there never really was any suspension (volcanoes don’t need leaf springs or anything). Boogerbunga is the wrong type of volcano for any big event. It lays along, and is part of, the mid-Atlantic ridge systems. This is “like” a big rip in the Earth’s fragile crust, where molten materials from the mantle[sup][1][/sup] can EASILY break through to the surface. Think of a meandering brook in some enchanted meadow with pixies and elves and unicorns prancing about. Volcanoes that lie near subduction zones are the evil types, Vulcan when he’s angry with pathetic humans. Where tectonic plates grind past on another, great amount of friction builds up, melting the lower crustial materials[sup][2][/sup]. Thermal expansion causes a great amount of pressure to build and there’s just no place to release it, until the overburden of rock finally gives way. Think of a mass orgy in a downtown Seattle city park getting hit with 1200ºC pummy rock at 1400 km hr[sup]-1[/sup] while a 300 m tsunami rolls in with Big Foot attacking with M-60 machine guns. … and you Pit unicorns … [1] = I just made that up [2] = I made this up too [3] = [Bigger than Luxembourg](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c8/Aerial_Crater_Lake.jpg) [4] = I made THAT up as well [5] = [Citation](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toba_catastrophe_theory) ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/49 "2014-09-05T13:36:15Z")
> **[Live from Iceland - Webcams around Iceland](https://www.livefromiceland.is/)** > > Watch live feeds from our webcams with spectacular views of Iceland. Our streaming cameras are placed all around Iceland and broadcast 24/7. The ultimate slow TV! Looks like that big old volcano respected my pitting, and is calming the fuck down. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/50 "2014-09-05T14:17:43Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > The Pompeii affair was a complete cover up! (And don’t get me started on Herculaneum.) Yes, covered up very thoroughly . . . ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/51 "2014-09-05T18:17:23Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > [Live from Iceland.](http://www.livefromiceland.is/webcams/bardarbunga-2/) > > Looks like that big old volcano respected my pitting, and is calming the fuck down. You call [spewing 300-foot high fountains of lava from fissures totaling two miles long](http://volcanocafe.wordpress.com/2014/09/05/a-new-fissure-has-opened-bardarbunga-update-140905/) ‘calming down’? Seriously, though, the biggest worry currently is that the sub-glacial caldera that makes up the central Bardabunga volcano may collapse into the magma chamber below it. If that happens, it’s likely to make a fairly spectacular ‘bang’. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/52 "2014-09-05T18:52:47Z")
Yep. The cool thing about that? Due to how slow sound moves, we should know about it long before we hear it. In fact, we can calculate at what time it will hit. So it might not be a shocking surprise, but an awaited event. That goddam nuclear winter that will follow, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/53 "2014-09-06T18:17:57Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > the biggest worry currently is that the sub-glacial caldera that makes up the central Bardabunga volcano may collapse into the magma chamber below it. If that happens, it’s likely to make a fairly spectacular ‘bang’. [Short Subglacial Eruptions have occurred](http://icelandreview.com/news/2014/09/06/short-subglacial-eruptions-have-occurred) > [@](#): > > In the surveillance flight yesterday the ice-surface at Bárðarbunga was measured with the radar system of Isavia’s aircraft. The measurements show large changes on the ice-surface. Up to 15 m subsidence has occurred in the centre of the caldera, which corresponds to a volume change of 0.25 km3. The shape of the subsidence area is in accordance with the elevation of the caldera floor having lowered by that amount. > > Subsidence of this order has not been observed in Iceland since measurements of crustal movements started around the middle of last century. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/54 "2014-09-06T23:21:25Z")
> [@Squink](#): > > [Short Subglacial Eruptions have occurred](http://icelandreview.com/news/2014/09/06/short-subglacial-eruptions-have-occurred) Yeah, there have been more than a dozen 5.0 or larger quakes around the perimeter of the caldera since this whole thing started. I don’t claim to be an expert, but I’m a bit amazed that it’s held together this long. ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2014, 9:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/55 "2014-09-07T09:29:42Z")
> [@FXMastermind](#): > > FYI live webcam > > If it really blows, I expect that stream to clog. Still, it's cool to have an eye on my mortal enemy. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but this is an old video. Most of Youtube is. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2014, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/56 "2014-09-07T13:01:14Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but this is an old video Yes, but I thought I updated the live video links. [Cam 1](http://www.livefromiceland.is/webcams/bardarbunga/) and [Cam 2](http://www.livefromiceland.is/webcams/bardarbunga-2/) ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2014, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/57 "2014-09-09T00:56:29Z")
In the tenth century, a Norseman named Bárður Bjarnason settled in northern Iceland with his nine sons. Conditions were rough, and Bjarnason decided to follow his sons south in search of more fertile land. His route, the story goes, stretched across Europe’s largest ice cap, Vatnajökull, and passed by several volcanoes, including one that he decided to name after himself. Blanketed in white, it probably looked much like it does today—a massive, radiant hump. Bjarnason, or one of his descendants, called the volcano Bárðarbunga. The name means “Bárður’s bulge.” > **[Reshaping the Earth](https://www.newyorker.com/tech/annals-of-technology/reshaping-earth)** > > Will climate change alter the planet’s contours? ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2014, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/58 "2014-09-13T00:20:06Z")
> **[11 Photos of Iceland's Bardarbunga Volcano Erupting That Are Just Unreal](https://mashable.com/archive/iceland-bardabunga-volcano-eruption-photos)** > > 11 Photos of Iceland's Bardarbunga Volcano Erupting That Are Just Unreal My enemy, she is beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![FXMastermind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fxmastermind/32/7289_2.png) [@FXMastermind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FXMastermind)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715/59 "2014-10-13T16:32:50Z")
And clearly not interested in going away anytime soon. The cubic miles of material just keep building there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-bardarbunga/696715.md?page=2)