# Fuck You, Vote Democrat

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [November 5, 2018, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019 "2018-11-05T17:15:51Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/21 "2018-11-05T18:40:37Z")

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> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#):
>
> What about: “I don’t know how to buy stamps, so I can’t return my absentee ballot.”
> 
> How would the OP reply to _that_?

I’ve probably voted more absentee than in the polls, with ballots from three different states and none have required postage; you just drop it in the mail. Methinks they’ve never _seen_ an absentee ballot.

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**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/22 "2018-11-05T18:42:18Z")

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> [@RTFirefly](#):
>
> I’ve heard that one, and quite honestly, I can understand a generation for whom even email is old hat probably doesn’t know how to find the local post office.
> 
> But the freakin’ _grocery store_ sells stamps.

“I didn’t know the grocery store sells stamps,” seems a much more defensible kind of ignorance than, “I don’t know where my local post office is.” Grocery stores don’t advertise stamps, and they don’t put them on shelves. If I didn’t know from watching my parents buy them there when I was a kid, I’d have no idea that you can buy stamps at the checkout. Whereas, if I’d never been inside my local post office, I’d still know how to Google it.

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/23 "2018-11-05T18:43:02Z")

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> [@Procrustus](#):
>
> I never know what is meant by this. Do you have an example?

I guess I could go into an extended discourse on the neoliberal turn in Democratic politics since the Clinton era, but it seems to me that if you haven’t noticed it by now, I might not be able to convince you.

> [@John\_Mace](#):
>
> My Santa Clara County, CA mail-in ballot (“absentee” sounds so archaic these days) came with a postage paid envelope. I know that’s not standard everywhere, but it should be.

In Australia, just about every government-related form comes with a postage-paid envelope. I remember, when I first arrived in the US, being amazed that I actually had to buy my own stamp in order to submit my government-mandated tax return to the government using the government’s own postal service.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/24 "2018-11-05T18:43:59Z")

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Fuck You. I’m voting for my own best interests.

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**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/25 "2018-11-05T18:46:53Z")

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> [@mhendo](#):
>
> IIn Australia, just about every government-related form comes with a postage-paid envelope. I remember, when I first arrived in the US, being amazed that I actually had to buy my own stamp in order to submit my government-mandated tax return to the government using the government’s own postal service.

We are rugged individualists here, not mamby-pamby little wards of the state. Most of us built our soddies with our bare hands after trekking across the plains in covered wagons! 😉

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/26 "2018-11-05T18:56:19Z")

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> [@John\_Mace](#):
>
> We are rugged individualists here, not mamby-pamby little wards of the state. Most of us built our soddies with our bare hands after trekking across the plains in covered wagons! 😉

Yeah, built your soddies on free land handed out by the government. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/27 "2018-11-05T19:03:43Z")

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Fuck me, I’m voting Republican (mostly). So perhaps just a handjob.

Regards.  
Shodan

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**Author:** ![GreysonCarlisle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a87d85/32.png) [@GreysonCarlisle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreysonCarlisle)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/28 "2018-11-05T19:03:49Z")

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> [@Gatopescado](#):
>
> Fuck You. I’m voting for my own best interests.

Fuck me… I’m voting for my grandchildrens’ best interests. So, outside of one local race, that’ll be Democrat.

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**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/29 "2018-11-05T19:20:27Z")

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> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#):
>
> What about: “I don’t know how to buy stamps, so I can’t return my absentee ballot.”
> 
> How would the OP reply to _that_?

How about “Let me help you figure that out” or even “It’s a good time to learn how.”

Same as “I don’t know how to send a text” or “I can’t figure out how to watch a DVD”. Help people, don’t be a prick.

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**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/30 "2018-11-05T19:24:54Z")

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> [@Weird\_With\_Words](#):
>
> My motto of the day: Fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> Why? Glad you asked, me, because I usually don’t endorse straight ticket voting, even those times when I did it out of laziness. But this asshole needs some checks put on his power and the Republicans are far too comfortable abiding him so long as they get their tax cuts and deregulation. Are they enough? Good followup, Me2. I can only say I’m hoping they are. I mean, are they GOOD enough? As in progressive enough? I’m not satisfied, no. But then, a lot of people say they’re “too extreme”. That’s why perspective isn’t just a word.
> 
> What it comes down to is this, they’re the only viable anti-Trump ticket in town. They are the voice of protest, and the voice of possible action. What point is there in a protest vote against the protest ticket? To what end should one demand more action when refusing to vote for the only possible action at this moment? In short: Fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> And while I’m here, a quick rundown of the other arguments…
> 
> “I wish they were more progressive.” Me too, but right now they’re the only thing less regressive than Trump, so vote Democrat. And if that’s too complicated, how about: fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> “What about third parties?” There’s a time for that conversation. But today? Fuck you, vote democrat.
> 
> “The system is rigged.” It’s easier to rig a close one than it is to turn back a landslide. In other words: Fuck you, vote democrat.
> 
> “I’m a Libertarian. Liberty or death, no compromise.” Be still my beating heart! Sweep me into those muscly arms so I might whisper into your ear: Fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> “I’m an independent.” You’re redundant. Fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> “I may register one way or the other, but I’ll vote for who I think is right, regardless.” Such a maverick! Fuck you, vote Democrat.
> 
> “I vote for candidates, not political parties.” So brave! Fuck you, vote democrat.
> 
> “I think everyone needs to be judged on merits, not affiliations.” So wise! Fuck you, vote democrat.
> 
> “Democrats are liars.” So what?! Fuck you, vote Democrat!
> 
> “I vote my conscience.” If your conscience isn’t telling you that Trump is the worst rot we’ve seen in a century then fuck you and your conscience. (And vote democrat plz.)

Awesome! I just did a dramatic reading of this at work

Thanks!

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**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/31 "2018-11-05T19:26:10Z")

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> [@Miller](#):
>
> “I didn’t know the grocery store sells stamps,” seems a much more defensible kind of ignorance than, “I don’t know where my local post office is.” Grocery stores don’t advertise stamps, and they don’t put them on shelves. If I didn’t know from watching my parents buy them there when I was a kid, I’d have no idea that you can buy stamps at the checkout. Whereas, if I’d never been inside my local post office, I’d still know how to Google it.

The relevant thing to Google would just be “how do I buy stamps?” I can definitely see people who grew up with mail only being for bills not knowing where stamps were sold.

But that isn’t the problem. The problem is that these kids are not all that motivated to vote. They’ve been sheltered all their lives from the effects of politics. They’re also often idealistic, which makes the fact that you always vote for the lesser of two evils unappealing. (We need to get out ahead of this and explain why this is always the case, and why it’s a good thing.) Putting up any additional barrier is a bad idea if you want them to vote.

We can’t just sit back and tut-tut them for this lack of motivation. That’s as dumb as teaching abstinence in schools. The reality is that college students aren’t motivated to vote, and we need to do what we can so they do vote.

It bothers me that there still aren’t voting booths on campus. There is no reason for this. They are at college. The government knows they are at college. And, for once, you have a good argument for IDs, since all college students have them. You could let them vote.

But, barring that, Get Out the Vote campaigns need to go beyond the first step of making it easy to sign up for absentee ballots. They can provide a place to mail off the ballots, and have stamps with them. They can send out emails to remind students to go check their mailbox to get their ballots. They can provide a sample absentee forms to show them how to not mess up and put their address on the wrong part–maybe even have it partially filled out for them.

We want college students to vote. So help them vote. Make it easy at first, so they get into the habit, and do it for themselves after they leave college.

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**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/32 "2018-11-05T19:28:04Z")

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> [@Gatopescado](#):
>
> Fuck You. I’m voting for my own best interests.

And that is voting Democrat.

But you do know you’re supposed to be voting for the good of the country, right? It’s not about you.

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**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/33 "2018-11-05T19:30:47Z")

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> [@DesertDog](#):
>
> I’ve probably voted more absentee than in the polls, with ballots from three different states and none have required postage; you just drop it in the mail. Methinks they’ve never _seen_ an absentee ballot.

I’m not defending these morons, but no, not all locales (including mine) have postage paid absentee ballots. I would suspect more places don’t offer postage paid than do offer it.

But, yes, this is a thing with some millennials. They’ve never needed to buy a stamp, and are letting this be an obstacle to their voting.

I, for one, think every state needs to offer postage-paid ballots, especially as more and more adults move away from sending things via USPS. But until then, fuck you, find a post office and vote Democratic.

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**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/34 "2018-11-05T19:33:20Z")

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> [@RTFirefly](#):
>
> I’ve heard that one, and quite honestly, I can understand a generation for whom even email is old hat probably doesn’t know how to find the local post office.
> 
> But the freakin’ _grocery store_ sells stamps.

Hell, you can get stamps at a freakin’ ATM.

Oh wait, that generation never carries cash. They have no use for an ATM.

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**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/35 "2018-11-05T19:40:13Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> It bothers me that there still aren’t voting booths on campus. There is no reason for this. They are at college. The government knows they are at college. And, for once, you have a good argument for IDs, since all college students have them. You could let them vote.

Because I’d bet the majority of students aren’t registered to vote at their college address. Even if they live off campus, not everyone lives in the jurisdiction where the college is. And for the people living permanently in that jurisdiction, they aren’t inclined to get everyone at the school registered at their school address so they can make ballot decisions for the town they most likely won’t be at in 4 years. That’d be a fucking mess for everyone.

There’s no reason to have polls AT colleges, but there’s nothing wrong with groups pushing absentee ballot voting on campus.

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**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/36 "2018-11-05T20:13:43Z")

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I’m not allowed to vote Democrat.

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**Author:** ![EscAlaMike](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/escalamike/32/4177_2.png) [@EscAlaMike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EscAlaMike)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/37 "2018-11-05T20:28:41Z")

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> [@ZipperJJ](#):
>
> Because I’d bet the majority of students aren’t registered to vote at their college address. Even if they live off campus, not everyone lives in the jurisdiction where the college is. And for the people living permanently in that jurisdiction, they aren’t inclined to get everyone at the school registered at their school address so they can make ballot decisions for the town they most likely won’t be at in 4 years. That’d be a fucking mess for everyone.
> 
> There’s no reason to have polls AT colleges, but there’s nothing wrong with groups pushing absentee ballot voting on campus.

This is true. I voted absentee all through college and was always registered at my parents’ address.

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**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/38 "2018-11-05T21:00:39Z")

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I will vote for the occasional GOPer (mostly judges, treasurer and such), but it’s not easy when their major candidates are mostly old hacks and/or corrupt, and approve ads that assume their constituents are morons.\*

I have to go now, Michael Bloomberg and George Soros are lurking in the shrubbery, waiting to seize my guns.\*\*

\*true in many cases…but it’s not nice to remind us like that.  
\*\*earlier it was Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer. Apparrently they weren’t scary enough. :eek:

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**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/39 "2018-11-05T21:04:54Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Quoth **septimus** :
> 
> And these days when someone says “I’m too smart and independent to brainlessly vote a straight D ticket,” I think to myself: “There goes another brainless imbecile.”

Hey, I’m too smart and independent to brainlessly vote a straight D ticket, too. I’m brainfully voting straight D.

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**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2018, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-vote-democrat/824019/40 "2018-11-05T21:13:37Z")

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> [@Shoeless](#):
>
> Hell, you can get stamps at a freakin’ ATM.
> 
> Oh wait, that generation never carries cash. They have no use for an ATM.

You can? I’ll be damned.

Of course, I’m not a millennial, and I still don’t carry cash.

I volunteered to canvass for the local Democrat on Saturday. That’s so far out of my comfort zone that the Hubble might have trouble seeing it… which goes to show just how important I feel this election is.

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