# Fuck you work and your \[possible\] homophobia **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 18, 2009, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561 "2009-09-18T05:59:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![The\_Lurker\_Above](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Lurker\_Above](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Lurker_Above)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/21 "2009-09-18T18:05:44Z")
> [@Steampunk\_Willie](#): > > 1. She said the other problem was is that as the night auditor I balance the money for the day. I don’t know if any of you are or have had this position but my abilities are VERY limited. I have the same access level as everyone else and _everything_ we do is logged in the system with our name and the time. I can’t access the safe, just the drawer that EVERYONE ELSE HAS ACCESS TO ON THEIR SHIFT AND HAS TO BE COUNTED AND SIGNED IN AND OUT. My job is essentially the same as the day or afternoon shift but I check to make sure the system/day is in balance, I print out a bunch of forms, and then plug in data to a spreadsheet. The spreadsheet that is checked and altered by, you guessed it, the Accounting/Human Resources woman. The audit also used to be done by my friend at the front desk who was dating the van driver/houseman for over a year. I’ve actually worked in all of those positions in a similar sized hotel (except HR). And part of our annual audit is a audit of procedures; relatives/romatic partners working at different points along desk/audit/accounting (ie the employees along the path charges and credits follow from room account to general ledger) would be an issue. In my case the GM had to sign off on me working both night audit (covering vacations) and A/R. ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/22 "2009-09-18T18:08:07Z")
> [@Skammer](#): > > I would not consider hiring the spouse or fiance of an employee into a job where they would be working together. For one thing, they would be going on vacation at the same time, and therefore unable to cover for each other. (what I just said is probably illegal, isn’t it?) ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/23 "2009-09-18T18:11:21Z")
> [@Steampunk\_Willie](#): > > The 2nd was an idiot that would call out during her first week for stupid things like “a leg infection” that prevented her from leaving the house but later that day she came by to get her paycheck. Tiny hijack here – just FYI, it IS possible to have a leg infection such that you are required to stay home (taking antibiotics and lying down with leg elevated) but still be able to dash in to town for fifteen minutes on an errand. Doesn’t mean your ex-coworker WASN’T lying, and especially doesn’t mean that she wasn’t an IDIOT for going in to pick up her check under the circumstances, especially as a new hire who wouldn’t exactly be winning any awards for calling in sick in the first place, but she may have been telling the truth. RE: your OP. I’m not sure whether you are being discriminated against or not based upon the scenario, but I suspect this is a no-win situation for you and your BF (as in “boyfriend,” not “best friend,” though hopefully he’s both). From what I’ve been able to find, employment discrimination based on sexual orientation (and, in some cases, transgender status) is illegal in Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Connecticut, NY, NJ, Maryland, District of Columbia, Wisconsin, Illinois, Minnesota, Washington, Oregon, Nevada, New Mexico and Hawaii, so from a “state” point of view, you are looking pretty good. However, proving your case will be difficult at best, and I’m sure you know that doing anything that may suggest that you or your boyfriend are considering legal action won’t endear you in the hearts of management. Even if you do get satisfaction, I think you may safely assume that it will only be after many months, which won’t do you any good right now when you need it. It isn’t right, but it is reality. If your guy wants to pursue this, the two of you should probably get a quick consultation with an employment attorney and see what s/he thinks about your prospects. Perhaps you could contact the Human Rights Campaign and see if they have any suggestions. Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2009, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/24 "2009-09-18T19:05:07Z")
> [@Sigmagirl](#): > > For one thing, they would be going on vacation at the same time, and therefore unable to cover for each other. > > (what I just said is probably illegal, isn’t it?) No, not at all. “Romantically involved” is not a protected class. Lots of businesses either have a formal policy or an informal practice to not hire close relations and/or romantically linked people to work in the same office or on the same project or whatever. There are defensible reasons for this, ranging from wishing to avoid the appearance of favoritism or nepotism, to concern about staff morale should the relationship go south, to issues as to who will be available to cover shifts. That’s why if the OP’er’s fiance is only the first or second person who they have declined to hire on the basis of a romantic attachment, he will find it extremely difficult to prove discrimination – there are legitimate reasons not to hire another employee’s love-interest. It’s only if the OP’er’s fiance can show a _pattern or practice_ of _allowing_ such hires, that he _may_ be able to show that this reason was in his case pretextual (an excuse) and not legitimate, which in turn _may_ support a claim of discriminatory hiring practices. ---
**Author:** ![waterj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@waterj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waterj2)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/25 "2009-09-19T00:44:30Z")
> [@Steampunk\_Willie](#): > > Thank you **Captain Amazing**. I definitely don’t want to do or even say anything before doing that research. I just didn’t even know if it seemed valid and wanted to get more opinions. I am not sure about my state but the whole New England area is known for having the more pro-gay laws. According to [this site](http://www.thetaskforce.org/reports_and_research/nondiscrimination_laws), all the New England states have laws against discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/26 "2009-09-19T00:52:47Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > What’s that got to do with anything? It’s a hotel, isn’t it? Maybe you got derailed by the _prior_ job at the Salvation Army? Doesn’t the Salvation Army run those weird cheapo hotels in where men and women are put on seperate floors? ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2009, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561/27 "2009-09-19T18:53:32Z")
> [@Jodi](#): > > Lots of businesses either have a formal policy or an informal practice to not hire close relations and/or romantically linked people to work in the same office or on the same project or whatever. There are defensible reasons for this, ranging from wishing to avoid the appearance of favoritism or nepotism, to concern about staff morale should the relationship go south, to issues as to who will be available to cover shifts. A woman who worked for me suggested we hire her live-in boyfriend to help us out with some manual labor (moving computer equipment, etc.). I wasn’t crazy about this idea, but was overruled from above. It didn’t work out very well, and we ultimately lost both of them. As she was very competent, this was a major loss to us. Since that time, I have had a “no-relatives” policy, and have consistently recommended the same to other managers within our organization. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-work-and-your-possible-homophobia/510561.md?page=1)