# Fucking Chase and their tautological "Free Checking!"
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [January 5, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868 "2007-01-05T21:43:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 7
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2007, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/41 "2007-01-08T23:20:50Z")
And in fact, the only one on that page that even _uses_ the word “free” - My Access Checking - specifically says “No minimum balance required”.
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### Author:  [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2007, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/42 "2007-01-08T23:26:47Z")
[QUOTE=World Eater]
So I could open a “free” checking account, keep $1499 in my account, and lo and behold, it isn’t free.
Different banks have different conditions and minimum balances, some including $0
What I said was perfectly true.
[/QUOTE]
I’ll quote you a third time:
> [@](#):
>
> Free checking is often **only** “free” if the balance is above a certain threshold. Usually $500 bucks or so. [emphasis mine]
There are TWO other conditions by which that account will be free. Your statement is still false.
Checking accounts that _require_ a minimum balance to waive the monthly fee are never called “free checking”.
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### Author:  [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)
#### Post date: [January 8, 2007, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/43 "2007-01-08T23:27:59Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass]
And in fact, the only one on that page that even _uses_ the word “free” - My Access Checking - specifically says “No minimum balance required”.
[/QUOTE]
We looking at the same page?
“FREE of monthly fees” starts off every account I can see.
Or are you saying that it’s not misleading because the word free isn’t in the account name?
If so we’ll use “Chase Free Checking” which charges $6 a month if used without direct deposit. Last time I checked $72 a year wasn’t free.
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### Author:  [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2007, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/44 "2007-01-09T00:02:22Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass]
I’ll quote you a third time:
There are TWO other conditions by which that account will be free. Your statement is still false.
[/quote]
And is it still false if those other conditions are not met?
> [@](#):
>
> Checking accounts that _require_ a minimum balance to waive the monthly fee are never called “free checking”.
They’re just pawned off as “no fee” or “free of monthly fees”, which of course has a completely different implication. :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2007, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/45 "2007-01-09T03:13:55Z")
[QUOTE=World Eater]
We looking at the same page?
[/quote]
Apparently not.
> [@](#):
>
> “FREE of monthly fees” starts off every account I can see.
I don’t see that on ANY of them. For example “Standard Checking” says: “No monthly service charge if balance requirements are met”. Clearly, waiving the montly charge is _conditional_ upon a balance requirement being met. That’s why they call it “Standard Checking” as opposed to “Free Checking”.
What location did you enter? Is it different in your location?
> [@](#):
>
> Or are you saying that it’s not misleading because the word free isn’t in the account name?
>
> If so we’ll use “Chase Free Checking” which charges $6 a month if used without direct deposit. Last time I checked $72 a year wasn’t free.
O.K., _fourth_ time:
> [@World Eater](#):
>
> Free checking is often only “free” if the balance is above a certain threshold
Break this sentence down logically:
X often ONLY has quality Y if condition Z exists.
This means that in the cases of X to which ‘often’ refers, quality Y CANNOT exist unless condition Z exists.
In order for that sentence to be true, there must be at least one instance of X where, if condition Z does not exist, then quality Y CANNOT exist.
If not - if in fact in ALL cases of X, it is true that Y can be present without condition Z existing, then the statement is not true.
In every example you have given so far, the monthly fee _can_ be waived _without_ the balance necessarily being above a given amount.
Therefore your statement is still false.
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### Author:  [@Race\_Bannon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Race_Bannon)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2007, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/46 "2007-01-09T04:16:44Z")
Here’s my “free checking” story:
I went into my bank (Colonial Bank) for some other business, and saw a poster saying, “Ask about our FREE CHECKING, offer ends soon”.
Since I was paying $6 a month for my checking, I did just that, the conversation went like this:
ME: I’d like to ask about the free checking - is there a minimum balance?
BANK: No, there’s no minimum.
ME: Well, great then, I’d like to switch over to that.
BANK: You already have an account here?
ME: Yes, I have a checking account, and a savings account.
BANK: Well, that offer is for new customers only.
ME: Oh, you mean they get free checking for 6 months or something like that?
BANK: No, there’s no time limit.
ME: You mean it’s free checking for life, with no minimum balance?
BANK: Yes, but it’s for new customers only.
ME: You mean, I have direct payroll deposit, two accounts, and a mortgage here, and I’ve paid $6 a month for checking for the last 5 years, but the next guy that walks in the door with a hundred bucks cash gets free checking for life?
BANK: Well, um, yes.
{long pause}
Me: So, if I go over to that teller, and get all my money out of my checking account - then drive 5 miles down the road to one of your other offices, I can open a new account and get free checking for life?
Why wouldn’t I do that?
Bank: let me talk to the manager…
They gave me the “free checking” deal.
But I still pay for internet access on the account.
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### Author:  [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)
#### Post date: [January 9, 2007, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-chase-and-their-tautological-free-checking/386868/47 "2007-01-09T23:02:16Z")
You got a greeting that started with “H”. How’s $20 sound?
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