Good point, astro.
Well after great debate I feel it’s time I defended myself. There are just a few points I must add.
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Like Lola said before there were No guests in line, the night had been terribly dead and we were well under our projected sales. Now, this generally means = no guests in line. And the way my store is set up guests can not see what is going on behind the counter unless they are right in front of the cash. So this lady didn’t really see anything that was going on.
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The swooning I mentioned consisted of should be clarified. Lola was standing on one side of the counter and I was on the other and I said a few “I love you’s” and made her a tea. Now, Lola did lean on the counter as I spoke to her which apparently was horrible for this women to watch. So I do have to apologize to the women and anyone here who thought “swooning” meant I was fucking Lola on the counter in front of little old ladies and babies.
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Affection between crew and SO’s is not against any rules or procedures at Wendy’s. I would assume that most of them would be able to use some common sense about how much affection to show and to this date I haven’t had to reprimand anyone over this subject.
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And I will still stand on the fact that she was homophobic. She only saw Lola and I once she got to the counter and had it been a male/female kiss I would bet my life she would not have said a thing. If any of you could have seen the look she gave me you would belive me on this subject, so I honestly hope most of you will belive me.
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And finally, she did spend 30 minutes staring at me like I was shit, which as far as I could tell was either to provoke me or make sure I wasn’t continuing my horrid behavior. But I remained calm and acted as professional as I could. So I would appreciate everyone refraining from questioning my ability to run a shift professionally. Thank you!
I would like to thank all of you who have been supportive. Lola warned my the backlash might be overwhelming but I assured her that as long as one person was supportive I would be okay. So hats off to those of you who decided to think out of the box. And to those of you disagree with my, well that's your right but I would appreciate not being attacked as a person or a loyal worker thank you very much.
Cory
Now its my turn to come to the defense of my darling Lola. Before you start throwing stones at her please take into account that she has worked in retail, she has also been an employee of Tim Hortons and is now working at Subway working her **“ignorant, immature, spoiled brat” ** of an ass off making 8 bucks and hour serving people who don’t appreciate the shit she puts up with. Then she comes home and has to deal with people like you who jump on her before really hearing her out and assuming she is such a horrible person. Well heres a little news flash. Our miss Lola is one of the nicest, sweetest people you will ever meet. She is compassionate and loving. She is sweet as hell to everyone she serves at Subway even drunk homeless guys you give her a hard time! I will be damned if I am going to sit here and have anyone call the future mother of my children an asshole. So you had better watch where you direct those words buddy!
I’m sure she’s a wonderful person when she’s not saying “fuck you” to everyone in the thread who disagrees with her by giving them the finger. To be frank with you, the real pisser is the notion of her perched high atop her “how dare you judge my PDA behavior / tell me what I can do with my body / no one’s the boss of me” horse, looking down her nose and sneering at those who seriously dedicate themselves to a job. That she works in fast food retail and feels this way, makes it even worse, as it illustrates the obvious contempt she has for anyone dedicating themselves to taking a fast food service job as a professional vocation.
astro, I already apologized for the posts you’re objecting to, in my first post on the second page of this thread. I was feeling extremely defensive because I knew that Amber was getting hurt by the comments directed at her in this thread. I am very protective of her and it made me angry that her feelings were hurt by the bitchface customer and then the Dopers, so I took that anger out in random, drive-by, and indefensible posts. Now that we both have some distance, you will notice that I have cooled it somewhat.
I won’t lie, I’m not a “lifer”, I’m working fast food until I get an education. I don’t see how anyone can support a family on the pittance ff workers are paid, let alone survive without benefits, etc. IMHO, the ff industry anally rapes the poor by treating them like expendable labour and not investing at all in their employees. I do not judge people who choose to work in ff as a career.
I get snarky about calling working at Wendy’s a “profession”, because real professionals get respect from their clients and their superiors, living wages, benefits packages that provide adequate health care, time off/sick days without guilt trips, and sometimes even a pension. Fast food workers get none of those things. And if they get even one, it’s the exception, rather than the rule.
It’s not that I don’t respect ff workers at all, it’s that I respect them more.
That post was by me. Please arrest me for Posting While Drunk.
I just got back from work’s XMas party. There was Sangria. In pitchers. God bless my boss (now if I can just get him to give me a raise…)
AGAINST?!
:eek:
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I’m not quite sure why that matters. If you’re in an area where customers might see you then you should behave as if they can see you.
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I think for most of us PDAs just aren’t shown at our places of business. Since we’re not used to them where we work we’re surprised to see it and view it as unprofessional. If I was your customer I wouldn’t have complained but I would have thought “sheesh, take it elsewhere.” If I were your supervisor I wouldn’t have written you up I just would have said “cool it” when you’re some place customers can see you. This lady blew it out of proportion.
So basically you just wanted at least one person to tell you what you wanted to hear. That’s ok, lot’s of people are like that.
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Riiiiight. You’ve got us all scared now.
Marc
And what part of that changes the workers’ obligation to comport themselves with dignity and respect for their co-workers and customers? How much does someone have to be paid in order to do their job with pride? Do you need to have some certain number of sick days to refrain from stealing time from your employer? Was there really nothing within the scope of Amber’s managerial duties that could’ve been done in the time she spent being paid by her employer to make kissy-kissy faces and sweet talk with you?
That is what people are talking about when they say that the behavior was unprofessional. Your job doesn’t need to be a lifelong, career track type of position to demand that you do your best work while you’re there. You give as you get. It’s awfully hypocritical to bitch about little fast food workers and paid and what limited benefits they get to excuse slackass behavior. If you want to get ahead, you’re not going to do it if you think that hanging out with your girlfriend instead of doing your job is an appropriate course of action, especially if you’re the manager and the one who is supposedly in charge at the time.
I take it you guys are logged onto the same machine?
TeaElle, Right, thats basic behavior 101 for any and all jobs. Plus, your behavoir should be acceptable to everyone that walks through the door as a *paying costumer*. You should make an attempt to look as good as possible to the greatest number of costumers as to assure their return. Im not sure why your boss would not want the same. If one lady actually made a fuss then there may be dozens more that didn`t make it obvious but would rather not come back. Lost business.
Well, kung fu lola, if her boss has established a standard that this behavior is acceptable, if it falls within his/her accepted range of “professionalism,” then it’s fine by me. As I said, this board doesn’t set the standards; the employer does (even if you don’t think it is a “profession” they still sign the paychecks).
I know that when I was working as a Wendy’s manager, I wouldn’t have got away with it. I still agree that the woman probably over-reacted for some reason – and if you want to ascribe her behavior to homophobia, go ahead and do so if righteous outrage makes you feel better. Unless she fills out a comment card that says “I am a homophobe” I don’t think we’ll know for certain.
FISH
Well, lola, like I said, when I told my husband this story, I conveyed it as a hetero couple doing this, and he thought it unprofessional, so, from his POV, at least, homophobia couldn’t have had anything to do with it. I wasn’t trying to “jump” on anyone, just express my opinion. The two of you, over all, have struck me as pretty cool people, so I wasn’t going “OMFG, how could they have done such a thing??” More like, “Ooops, work-place faux-pas”. Now, as for this:
You apparently have a few mis-perceptions about what “true professionals” have to put up with. My husband is a computer engineer. He is well-compensated for his time. However: respect from clients? Not always. Last week, he had a client jumping all over him for putting the monitors on the right-hand side of the desk during some installations; bear in mind, the client had never specified. Hubby had already installed 51 machines, so he had to go back and move all the monitors. Respect from superiors? In his current job, yes. His boss recognizes him as being skilled and able, and treats him accordingly, but he has, in the past, had bosses that treat him like shit!
And, what about me? I’m a full-time homemaker. I consider it my profession, I take pride in it. But I’m sometimes treated quite badly by the “clients” (my kids). I do get respect from my “employer” (my husband, to whom I would assign this title because he brings home the paychecks, and it’s from him I get my money); the pay sucks if you break it down into hourly (I work from 6:30AM to 10PM Monday through Monday). I don’t get sick days, unless my husband can be home to hold down the fort. I’m not complaining. I’m just pointing out that maybe you have too narrow a view of what constitutes a “profession”.
But norine, I would certainly hope that your “employer” engages in PDAs with you on the “jobsite” after your “clients” have been duly served and have gone to bed. 
Well, your point. However, my particular profession has the advantage that I make the rules!! So, if I say smooching in the living room is OK, the “clientele” have no right whatsoever to complain about it! In this particular line of business, “the customer is always right” definitely does not apply:)
Oh, btw, I never meant to imply that the woman who complained wasn’t over-reacting; it sounds to me like she was. If I saw something like that, I might think it inappropriate, but I certainly wouldn’t have said anything unless it affected my service. All I was saying was that, in circumstances as set down in the OP, you couldn’t necessarily read homophobia into it.
What possible health violation comes from a few pecks?
You know, after reading the responses here it seems there is a whole lot of “How dare you not celebrate my sexuality, you homophobe?!” going on here.
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Neither in the OP, nor in the responses have you provided any actual evidence that the complainer was homophobic. She bitched about something she saw as objectionable in the workplace. She overreacted, but the disapproval was over the PDA. Unless she directly bitched about the fact it was a girl-girl kiss, Shut up on that one.
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PDA’s are considered to be inappropriate in the workplace. It doesn’t matter what your boss says, it’s what your customers decide is a pleasant enviornment to eat is. (Obviously this has it’s limits)
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I do not believe that anyone here made a serious attack on either of your characters’. If you can’t take a little criticism don’t post in the pit.
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The attitude of “Everyone ought to just deal with it,” in regards to PDAs; is a little more complicated than it sounds. If I go to a restaurant, I’m PAYING to EAT there. I’m NOT paying to watch Some cutesy-poo, lovey-dovey time, stright, gay, or other. If it was a couple of customers that she complained about, you could be damn sure a manager would have asked them politely to stop. The fact that you are the STAFF there makes it even more inappropriate, since you are the ones responsible for the pleasant eating enviornment.
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Lastly, perhaps redundantly, I’ll add that nobody made a direct assualt at anything other than your behaviour.
Waitaminute… we do? Ok, I’ve got to check that out…
I will say I probably would not have complained. Rolled my eyes and muttered, “Get a freaking room, already!” under my breath, sure.*
But honestly, I think that Cory AND Lola are overreacting as well. Guess what-working sucks. If you think it’s bad just because you’re in customer service, you’re pretty goddamn naive. My father’s a funeral director, and some of the shit he’s put up with through the years would make your hair fall out. No respect, no insurance, shitty deals, out and out illegal practices that he couldn’t do jackshit about-even though he was in the right.
If you were on your break, in a more secluded area, and she complained, I’d agree. But for godsakes, grow the fuck up. I like you both-I think you’re both pretty cool individuals and interesting posters. But you have to learn to pick and choose your battles and not jump all over people just because they disagree.
*And no, it’s not because you’re both female. It’s because I find PDAs annoying.
The FACT that she was homophobic? bet your life? please, there is nothing to believe about your fact because it is not one, it is your opinion. I’ve gotten dirty looks from old ladies for kissing my very much hetero girlfriend, just because you happen to be a lesbian doesn’t make prudish old laidies homophic. It just makes them prudish old ladies who believe anything remotedly sexual should be done in the bedroom with the lights off.