# Fucking United Airlines **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 25, 2017, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223 "2017-04-25T16:30:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/1 "2017-04-25T16:30:28Z")
The fuckers have rearranged one of my flights from 08:50 to 06:15. Which means getting to the airport at some ungodly early hour. I am NOT a morning person. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/2 "2017-04-25T16:37:30Z")
This is the first pitting of an airline for being _early_ I’ve ever seen. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/3 "2017-04-25T16:45:31Z")
Maybe you’d prefer to be … re-accommodated? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/4 "2017-04-25T16:46:00Z")
IME, those crack-of-dawn flights are usually the cheaper flights. I’m guessing the change didn’t reduce your fare at all? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/5 "2017-04-25T16:47:17Z")
nm (double post) ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/6 "2017-04-25T16:49:09Z")
If they bump you to an earlier flight, do you have to pay _them_ $800 and buy them a meal? ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/7 "2017-04-25T16:52:44Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > This is the first pitting of an airline for being _early_ I’ve ever seen. 😃 I don’t mind arriving early, but this means I’ll have to get up before 4 AM. I am NOT a morning person. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/8 "2017-04-25T17:25:59Z")
The way things are going you should count yourself lucky if they don’t fling you off the plane in the middle of the flight. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/9 "2017-04-25T17:33:41Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > If they bump you to an earlier flight, do you have to pay _them_ $800 and buy them a meal? You’ve confused it with Soviet Russia where United Airlines fucking YOU! ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/10 "2017-04-25T17:48:58Z")
> [@Mr.Greenjeans](#): > > IME, those crack-of-dawn flights are usually the cheaper flights. I’m guessing the change didn’t reduce your fare at all? I’m flying business class. ---
**Author:** ![JcWoman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jcwoman/32/2889_2.png) [@JcWoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JcWoman)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/11 "2017-04-25T17:55:56Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > I don’t mind arriving early, but this means I’ll have to get up before 4 AM. I am NOT a morning person. I hate that, too. My home airport is Dulles International, super busy. If you have a 6am departure from here, you have to arrive at the airport no less than 2 hours before departure, which means getting up around 3am. I once arrived about 1:45 hours prior to a domestic flight but the lines were so long that I didn’t get to check in my bags until a couple minutes after the cutoff time and the airline agents were like “toobadsosaditsnotourproblemnowfuckoff”. :mad: and that was in August, not the Thanksgiving/Christmas holiday crush time! ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/12 "2017-04-25T18:48:33Z")
> [@JcWoman](#): > > “toobadsosaditsnotourproblemnowfuckoff”. I think that may be the company motto. Or how they answer the phones: “Good afternoon, United Airlines, yourproblemisnotfuckingimportant” ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/13 "2017-04-25T19:02:39Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > I don’t mind arriving early, but this means I’ll have to get up before 4 AM. I am NOT a morning person. Don’t worry about it. 4:00am is nothing like morning. It’s the middle of the night. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/14 "2017-04-25T19:36:57Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > I don’t mind arriving early, but this means I’ll have to get up before 4 AM. I am NOT a morning person. Or not go to bed at all. Partayyy ! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/15 "2017-04-25T19:42:52Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Don’t worry about it. 4:00am is nothing like morning. It’s the middle of the night. Depends on the latitude and time of year. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2017, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/16 "2017-04-25T19:47:10Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > The way things are going you should count yourself lucky if they don’t fling you off the plane in the middle of the flight. \*\*No Ticket! \*\* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHSPf6x1Fdo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHSPf6x1Fdo) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c57346/32.png) [@Little\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Pig)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2017, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fucking-united-airlines/785223/17 "2017-04-27T09:57:49Z")
And what about that [Giant Rat](http://www.reuters.com/article/us-ual-rabbit-idUSKBN17S14L)?