# Full of Shit Person Suing Doctor **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 3, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353 "2003-10-03T15:26:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/1 "2003-10-03T15:26:26Z")
From this link: [NBC5 News Link](http://www.nbc5.com/health/2524081/detail.html) **Doctor Accused Of Sewing Woman’s Anus Shut** > [@](#): > > Physician Says He Could Refute All Claims > > POSTED: 10:38 a.m. CDT October 1, 2003 > UPDATED: 11:08 a.m. CDT October 1, 2003 > > CHICAGO – The Ohio State Medical Board is accusing a long-time doctor of negligence after complaints from two patients, including one whose anus was reportedly sewn shut. > > Dr. William Stefanich said that he could refute all the board’s claims. > > According to the Newark Advocate, one of Stefanich’s patients said that he had to go to the emergency room after the doctor operated on her hemorrhoids and claimed that doctors there discovered her anus was sutured closed and that part of her anal canal had been removed. > > Another claim involved a patient the board claimed was not given proper diagnostic tests. Why am I reminded of that little girl in _Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory_ who inflated into a blue ball and had to be rolled away by the Oompa Loompas? Regardless, on behalf of all of us who still have our assholes, I’d like to pit Dr. William Stefanich. “Y’know, captain, y’all got a Little ass left.” - Axel Foley ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/2 "2003-10-03T15:30:35Z")
I heard a joke like this a long time ago. A woman wanted to know what it was like to be pregnant. So she went to the doctor and asked him to perform a procedure on her so she would know what it was like. She woke up several hours later and said, “Doc, I don’t feel any different. What gives?” He said, “Give it a day or two, lady. I just sewed your ass shut.” * * * That being said, if this woman is for real, I hope she does get her ass sewn shut for real. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/3 "2003-10-03T15:48:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quietman1920 \* > **Why am I reminded of that little girl in _Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory_ who inflated into a blue ball and had to be rolled away by the Oompa Loompas?** Veruca Salt. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/4 "2003-10-03T15:49:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tdn \* > \*\*Veruca Salt. \*\* Ah crap. I meant Violet Beauregard. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/5 "2003-10-03T16:10:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tdn \* > \*\*Veruca Salt. \*\* You laid an egg on that one. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/6 "2003-10-03T16:13:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lord Ashtar \* > \*\*That being said, if this woman is for real, I hope she does get her ass sewn shut for real. \*\* Uh! ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/7 "2003-10-03T17:03:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quietman1920 \* > > > [@](#): > > > > According to the Newark Advocate, one of Stefanich’s patients said that he had to go to the emergency room after the doctor operated on her hemorrhoids and claimed that doctors there discovered her anus was sutured closed and that part of her anal canal had been removed. Uh, that’s pretty hard to refute. What’s he going to say, “It wasn’t me! This patient went and had that done by someone else, this is a frame-up?” That being said, the site needs to edit better; they changed the patient’s gender during the course of the quoted sentence. I thought the doctor “only” removed part of the anal canal, nothing more drastic… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/8 "2003-10-03T17:26:10Z")
\*I’ve got a doctor and he’s a real pal took 15 inches from my anal canal He’s got a practice and boy is it mal Put a plug at the end of my anal canal. It’s hauled some loads in my day Filled with dinner, drinks, and soup of the day And you know every inch of the way I’d really preferred that he not spay.\* ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/9 "2003-10-03T17:49:07Z")
Let’s see what [The Newark Advocate](http://www.newarkadvocate.com/news/stories/20031002/localnews/374933.html) has to say. > [@](#): > > The family practitioner, William John Stefanich, is fighting the accusations and said the charges are baseless and could unfairly ruin his reputation. > > “I can refute everything the medical board is saying,” he said this week. “They got the facts wrong. This is just an angry patient.” > > The second case, which took place in February 1997, involved a male patient with irregular bowel discharges who sought treatment advice from Stefanich. The board’s citation said the doctor did not perform appropriate tests, instead prescribing an anti-inflammatory drug. > > Two weeks later, that patient visited the emergency room, where surgeons diagnosed him with a severely damaged colon. They removed the organ and part of his small intestine, and gave him an external colostomy bag. > > Lauren Lubow, spokeswoman for the state medical board, said investigators opted to file formal charges against Stefanich based on their research, which indicated inappropriate actions and decisions in both cases. > > Stefanich said the board erred in its investigation and ignored his explanations. He has requested a hearing before the board to contest the charges and said he will detail his version of events then. > > The female patient did file suit against Stefanich in Licking County Common Pleas Court in 1998 seeking damages. But after 17 months, that suit was dismissed at the request of both sides. > > Stefanich said that dismissal shows her case has no real merit, and said he will be vindicated in the medical board’s other case, as well. > > “Anybody can turn to the medical board and charge something,” he said. “But they cannot substantiate these charges.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/10 "2003-10-03T17:57:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NurseCarmen \* > \*\*You laid an egg on that one. \*\* At least I didn’t kick the bucket. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/11 "2003-10-03T18:02:06Z")
…and it had to happen in Licking County… I bet the doctor felt like an ass. I got a million of 'em… ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/12 "2003-10-03T18:12:05Z")
**Ferret Herder** , I have to admit that I’m not really on the Dr’s side. The OP title is that the patient is full of shit…but that’s only because the Dr blocked up his/her anus. (Do you have any idea what good plumbers charge these days? I’d have to assume that getting Mario or Luigi to stand on the patient’s buttocks working away with a plunger would be quite cost-prohibitive. Damn that Dr!) ---
**Author:** ![stofsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dfb087/32.png) [@stofsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stofsky)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/13 "2003-10-03T19:00:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quietman1920 \* > \*\*Do you have any idea what good plumbers charge these days? I’d have to assume that getting Mario or Luigi to stand on the patient’s buttocks working away with a plunger would be quite cost-prohibitive. \*\* So many jokes, so little time… That’s why I got my HMO’s Gold plan. New York cops are cheaper. How much for a plumber’s helper with that plumber’s helper? [crickets chirping] ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/14 "2003-10-03T19:02:40Z")
Licking County. That’s just… _delicious_ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/15 "2003-10-03T20:45:57Z")
Ding,ding,ding! We have a winner! **Stofsky** , with 5 zings in one post!!! (Very Good!) Meanwhile in the ER: Dr. Green: “Damn that was a long shift. If I have to do even one more patient, I’m gonna rip somebody a new asshole.” Dr Weaver: “Dr. Green, I have one more patient for you in exam room 2…” ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/16 "2003-10-03T21:28:01Z")
I’ve driven through Licking County on my way to school (which was in Athens County)… It’s right next to Hocking County. How ya like me now? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Griffin)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/17 "2003-10-03T23:17:35Z")
Man, so does that women have to carry a bag around with her attacked to get butt for the rest of her life to catch her shit in? that’s ruff! ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2003, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/18 "2003-10-03T23:46:40Z")
Let’s wait for the actual evidence, people. I did peer review for an organization with over 100 physicians, where we investigated complaints like this. Over 90% of them were wildly exaggerated and based on the patient’s assumptions on what was said and/or done, not on what really happened. So I recommend we withhold judgement until some actual factual facts are in. There’s a lot of unsubstantiated complaining going on out there. Of course, every once in a while, I’d be _amazed_ at what a doc actually did do. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2003, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/19 "2003-10-04T00:00:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Qadgop the Mercotan \* > \*\*Let’s wait for the actual evidence, people. I did peer review for an organization with over 100 physicians, where we investigated complaints like this. Over 90% of them were wildly exaggerated and based on the patient’s assumptions on what was said and/or done, not on what really happened. \*\* Umm, I think I’d **know** if somebody sewed my ass shut. > [@](#): > > So I recommend we withhold judgement until some actual factual facts are in. Don’t you think this woman is experiencing enough withholding? > [@](#): > > There’s a lot of unsubstantiated complaining going on out there. And I’ll bet you wish there was some way to make the people doing it shut their holes, don’t you Doctor? I’ll bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you? Hmmm? ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2003, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353/20 "2003-10-04T03:24:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Griffin \* > \*\*Man, so does that women have to carry a bag around with her **attacked** to get butt for the rest of her life to catch her shit in? that’s ruff! \*\* Now that was a visual! Thanks!😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/full-of-shit-person-suing-doctor/205353.md?page=2)