# Fun and games with Mr James Dale

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 14, 2006, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146 "2006-12-14T16:29:22Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/1 "2006-12-14T16:29:22Z")

</div>

I’ve received a very interesting offer from Mr James Dale inviting me to help him embezzle 10 million pounds from the dormant bank account of a deceased person. I have decided to play the multiple personalities game and will be switching between three different modes of reply; Warm and enthusiastic, confused and incoherent, and angry and intolerant; here’s the exchange so far:

> [@](#):
>
> From: James Dale  
> Subject: Inheritance Fund  
> Date: November 30th, 2006.
> 
> Hello,
> 
> I apologize if the contents hereunder are contrary to your moral ethics, but please treat it with absolute secrecy and personal courtesy. I am James Dale an Auditor in commercial Bank here in UK, in the process of auditing our bank accounts this Final quarter, I and one of my colleagues recently discovered that there is a dormant account valued at the sum £10,000,000.00 (Ten Million British Pound Sterling) and after due verification of this account we discovered that the account owner is late and that is why the account has been dormant and as such a £10,000,000.00 has been lying in the bank unclaimed.
> 
> The idea of presenting a foreigner to act as his next of kin came into our mind, as you know the said deceased is a foreigner as well. Hence, that is how and why we have contacted you to present you as his next of kin, so that the £10,000,000.00 will be paid to you and we can both disburse the fund according to the percentage we will agree upon.
> 
> In view of this, I am seeking for your co-operation and understanding to stand as the next of kin to our deceased customer, to enable us claim the fund from my bank.
> 
> Hence, if this proposal is OK by you and you do not wish to take undue advantage of my trust, then I hope to bestow on you. Please kindly get back to me immediately, strictly via my private email address only: [snip] to enable me enlighten you on how we are to proceed.
> 
> On getting your response, we shall agree on the percentage ratio on which we shall disburse the £10,000,000.00 between us, as we intend to invest part of our own share in real estate or any lucrative business in your country, and we would appreciate if you can put us in the right part where we can invest our own share in your country. I will not contact any person or company until I hear from you, so as to enable me decides on what to do next.
> 
> Be rest assured that this business is 100% risk free.
> 
> We wait for your prompt response.
> 
> Best Regards,  
> James Dale.
> 
> NB: PLEASE NOTE THAT IT DOES NOT MATTER IF YOU ARE NOT RELATED TO MY LATE CLIENT OR NOT; THE FUND WILL STILL BE PAID TO YOU, SINCE I AM PRESENTING YOU AS HIS NEXT OF KIN.

> [@](#):
>
> From: Mangetout  
> To: James Dale
> 
> I need to know about modalities - are they all in place?

> [@](#):
>
> From: James Dale  
> To: Mangetout
> 
> Dear Mange Tout,
> 
> Thanks for your response; I am very happy to hear from you, I believe this is going to be the beginning of a new business relationship.
> 
> I want to assure you that this transaction will be conducted under a legitimate ground, which will protect you and me from every breach of law. This is just an opportunity that came my way and I decided to utilize it, so do not be afraid as we are both going to benefit from this transaction. You have to understand you are dealing with a married man with a lovely family; I cannot indulge myself in anything that is illegal.
> 
> For us to succeed in this transaction we are going to be working with some basic principles, which are TRUST, HONESTY, CO OPERATION and CONFIDENTIALITY, once we abide to this principles we shall succeed in this transaction.
> 
> I have decided to offer you 45% of the total sum of £10,000,000.00 and 5% for the expenses incurred during the transaction. I hope this offer is ok for you, it is good we agree on the percentage so that there will not be any problem when the fund is transferred into your account.
> 
> For us to commence this transaction, I require you write a letter to assure me that I will surely get my own 50% of the total fund once its in your possession, once you re- assure me this by writing in your next e mail, I will give you the e mail address of the bank with a text of what you will send them requesting that the fund should be paid into your account as the next of kin to the deceased person in question.
> 
> You will provide an account where this £10,000,000.00 will be paid into, I will advise you open a brand new account with just one hundred dollar in the account and give me the bank details, if you already have an account, I will advise you remove all the money in that account and give me the details so that we can commence the transaction, this is just to assure that we need the account.
> 
> Finally, please reconfirm the below details in your next email to me;
> 
> 1: YOUR FULL NAME  
> 2: CONTACT ADDRESS  
> 3: CONTACT PHONE & FAX NUMBER  
> 4: SEX/AGE  
> 5: COMPANY NAME  
> 6: OCCUPATION/POSITION
> 
> Awaiting your response,
> 
> Best Regards,  
> James Dale.

> [@](#):
>
> From: Mangetout  
> To: James Dale
> 
> Thanks, James, for your response, however I am disappointed that you didn’t answer my question about the modalities, and whether they are in place.

> [@](#):
>
> From: James Dale  
> To: Mangetout  
> Greetting Mange Tout,
> 
> ```
> Thank you so much for you response,I want to assure you that this transaction will be conducted under a legitimate ground, which will protect you and me from every breach of law. This is just an opportunity that came my way and I decided to utilize it, so do not be afraid as we are both going to benefit from this transaction. You have to understand you are dealing with a married man with a lovely family; I cannot indulge myself in anything that is illegal.
>  
> The idea of presenting a foreigner to act as his next of kin came into our mind, as you know the said deceased is a foreigner as well. Hence, that is how and why we have contacted you to present you as his next of kin, so that the £10,000,000.00 will be paid to you and we can both disburse the fund according to the percentage we will agree upon.
>  
> For us to commence this transaction, I require you write a letter to assure me that I will surely get my own 50% of the total fund once its in your possession, once you re- assure me this by writing in your next e mail, I will give you the e mail address of the bank with a text of what you will send them requesting that the fund should be paid into your account as the next of kin to the deceased person in question.
>  
> In view of this, I am seeking for your co-operation and understanding to stand as the next of kin to our deceased customer, to enable us claim the fund from my bank.
>  
> please confirm the below details in your next email to me;
>  
> 1: YOUR FULL NAME
> 2: CONTACT ADDRESS
> 3: CONTACT PHONE & FAX NUMBER
> 4: SEX/AGE
> 5: COMPANY NAME
> 6: OCCUPATION/POSITION
>  
> I await your response.
>  
> Mr. James Dale.
> 
> ```

> [@](#):
>
> From: Mangetout  
> To: James Dale
> 
> Quite honestly, I think you’re wasting my time. Give me a call when you have a SIGNIFICANT amount of money to offer.

At the moment, he’s only C&P’ing a form response, so I need to entice him to actually _talk_.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/2 "2006-12-14T16:31:49Z")

</div>

Jesus, no wonder [the Boy Scouts kicked him out](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Dale).  
I keed, I keed.

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**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/3 "2006-12-14T17:31:09Z")

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What is “NB”?

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**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/4 "2006-12-14T17:41:26Z")

</div>

[QUOTE=Sage Rat]  
What is “NB”?  
[/QUOTE]

NB Nota Bene (Latin: Note Well)

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**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/5 "2006-12-14T17:42:44Z")

</div>

He probably got the money as worker’s comp when Jack chopped his hand off.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/6 "2006-12-14T20:28:20Z")

</div>

See if you can get a photo of him wearing a chicken on his head. 🙂

It’d probably be safer than trying to beat Scamorama’s record, which used to be US $100. (I haven’t checked in over a year.)

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**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/7 "2006-12-14T20:55:37Z")

</div>

[QUOTE=Troy McClure SF]  
He probably got the money as worker’s comp when Jack chopped his hand off.  
[/QUOTE]

I was _waiting_ for that. 😃

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/8 "2006-12-14T21:32:46Z")

</div>

Open up a bank account at a bank that’s not yours. Put no money into it and give him THAT information.

Of course, that’s still a completely dumb thing to do.

Tell him that you agree with him and that you’ve also got a family. You can’t afford to throw yourself into such a scheme without notice. Tell him that you’re also hard up for cash because you/a loved one had a recent surgery.  
I agree. We need this guy talking.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [December 14, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/9 "2006-12-14T21:47:38Z")

</div>

It’s been done, and done well, already.

> **[Welcome to the 419 Eater](https://www.419eater.com/html/joe_eboh.htm)**
>
> 419 Eater. Anti Scammer letters pages, forum, anti-scammer hints and tips.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/10 "2006-12-15T03:59:32Z")

</div>

My. So it has!

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Heller\_Highwater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@Heller\_Highwater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heller_Highwater)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/11 "2006-12-15T04:48:12Z")

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I’m sorry **Mangetout** , but for my money, I dunno’ if you’ll ever be able to top your own similarly-titled [Fun and games with Mr Austin Wemba](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=242804).

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2006, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/12 "2006-12-15T05:18:48Z")

</div>

Wow…from starring in _Barnum_ on Broadway to scamming schlubs with e-mail. How the mighty have fallen…

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2006, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/13 "2006-12-18T02:29:31Z")

</div>

I haven’t heard from him for a couple of days - I think maybe I was a little hasty with the hostility, so I’ll see if i can charm him back. I sent this:

> [@](#):
>
> Hello James
> 
> I haven’t heard from you in a few days, so I just thought I’d get in touch to see how things were progressing.
> 
> I must apologise for the tone of my last email - I was having one of my moods, caused by a degenerative neural disease of which I am unfortunately a sufferer. My doctor tells me that this is because on several occasions, back in the late nineties, I ate sections of diseased cow’s spinal cord in a Subway sandwich - they have since removed these items from the menu, but alas, the damage is done for me.
> 
> Anyway, I should very much like to participate in your scheme, as I think this would enable me to build a worthwhile legacy for my children - I have five sons and six daughters, plus another seven children on the way (possibly nine, although only the DNA paternity tests will tell for sure).  
> Obviously it’s important to me that my offspring are properly provided for in the event of my demise, which may be sooner than I had originally hoped. My life insurance has already paid out, but that’s only a couple of hundred thousand, which isn’t going to spread very far.
> 
> So… please just tell me what to do next.
> 
> Cheers
> 
> William John Cavendish  
> (Mangetout)

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2006, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/14 "2006-12-18T02:50:38Z")

</div>

Deucedly clever of you, Cavendish.  
You really ought to get him to have a piccy snapped while roller skating.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2006, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/15 "2006-12-18T23:28:38Z")

</div>

OK, the game is still afoot; he has replied with:

> [@](#):
>
> Greetting William John Canendish,
> 
> Thanks so much for your mail to me, please confirm the below details in your next email to me;
> 
> 1: YOUR FULL NAME  
> 2: CONTACT ADDRESS  
> 3: CONTACT PHONE & FAX NUMBER  
> 4: SEX/AGE  
> 5: COMPANY NAME  
> 6: OCCUPATION/POSITION
> 
> After the details i requested from i will tell what you will do next.  
> I await your response..
> 
> Mr. James Dale.

Not sure what I’ll do next; obviously, I’m not going to give him anything like my genuine contact details, but if I give him false ones, that will become obvious quite quickly. I’m thinking maybe I should act terribly paranoid now and seek his reassurance.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2006, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/16 "2006-12-18T23:29:41Z")

</div>

Either that, or I could just ignore his request for information and get cheery and conversational.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\
**Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/17 "2006-12-19T02:38:59Z")

</div>

My standard suggestion for a phone number is 202-456-1414; tell him to ask for George.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/18 "2006-12-19T09:05:43Z")

</div>

I’ve replied with:

> [@](#):
>
> Hello James, it’s wonderful to hear from you again
> 
> I hope you won’t be offended, but I’m scared. I’m scared that the authorities might find out about this whole deal (I mean, it must be illegal, must it not?) and that I might end up in prison or something.
> 
> I’m also really scared about giving out all my personal details when I don’t really know you very well - I appreciate that you need some of this information to facilitate the transaction, but I’m sure like me, you’ve heard all kinds of horror stories about identity theft and other bad things.
> 
> Still, I don’t want to miss out on this, but how can I be sure I can trust you?
> 
> Cheers
> 
> William John Cavendish Bentinck

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\
**Post date:** [December 19, 2006, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/19 "2006-12-19T14:12:33Z")

</div>

My Christmas has come early - a new thread where **Mangetout** fucks with scammers.

I think every third e-mail should be completely off the wall - talk about what your aunt said that hurt your feelings when you were eight. I bet a lot of those who fall for this are lonely and need a friend, so if you present as if you were like that it might string Mr. Dale along a bit longer.

Tell him you don’t have a job, because you are on disability or something, but you used to be a clerk in a store where the boss was mean to you and sometimes the customers used to yell if you gave them wrong change and you had a girlfriend once but she moved away and your mother made you stop writing to her and she won’t let you have a dog and you wish the government did more for people who need help and there is never anything good on TV during the day.

Then ask if he can help with that.

Regards,  
Shodan

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\
**Post date:** [December 21, 2006, 9:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-and-games-with-mr-james-dale/384146/20 "2006-12-21T09:55:24Z")

</div>

Well, he’s come back with TWO email responses; they both consist of:

> [@](#):
>
> Dear William,
> 
> Thanks a lot for your email response, for your effort and most importantly for your noble assistance so far in this transaction. Well let me reintegrate to you once again that business is not conducted in a devious manner like that because I have already made up my mind to work side by side with you in this project until this whole transfer process is completed and as such I will appreciate if you can just have the required trust and confidence in me as business partner.
> 
> I am very encouraged and impress so with your desire to complete this transaction on our behalf and I also feel the same way. Therefore I will use this great opportunity to address and clarify all your doubts and concerns regarding this transaction.
> 
> They are as follows:
> 
> Firstly, you have to understand that you are dealing with a married man, I have my own family and I don’t think I will indulge myself in anything illegal, so there is no need to get scared about the whole deal, I really understand your paramount about this transaction but you have to put yourself together so we could finalize this transaction.
> 
> Secondly, this transaction is 100% legal, for we shall obtain all legal documents that shall be backing up this claim, as you may know, the information’s requested for shall be needed in finalizing this transaction, so I Mr. James Dale is re-assuring you of this transaction. Whichever information’s passed unto me shall never be used against you.
> 
> Finally, this opportunity was just an opportunity that came my way by GOD’S grace, and I hope its well known to you that opportunity comes but once in a life time, so I re-assure you that this transaction will be conducted under a legal manner without any risk at hand.
> 
> Thanks a lot for your contribution, for your courage to handle this project on our behalf and most importantly for reaching out to me in the time of need and for your kind gesture.
> 
> Yours sincerely,
> 
> Mr. James.
> 
> N:B: FURNISH ME WITH THE REQUESTED INFORMATIONS IN MY PREVIOUS EMAIL TO YOU.

Much of this appears to be a copy-paste of text from his previous emails… I don’t have time to reply to him in full right now, but I just sent him:

> [@](#):
>
> Hello James
> 
> Many thanks for your email… I can’t respond in full at the moment as I’m very busy now preparing the stable for pregnant visitors, but I’ll try to write to you again in the next day or two…
> 
> Just thought I’d mention though, that I have a really warm feeling about you - your style of writing, particularly your tendency to repeat yourself, but also, your tendency to repeat yourself - reminds me of my favourite elderly aunt, Morphia Tricity-Bendix, who also has a tendency to repeat herself and an amusing habit of repeating herself.
> 
> Anyway, goodbye for now, and I will contact you again soon
> 
> Regards
> 
> William John Cavendish Scott-Bentinck

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