# Fun With English **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 19, 2006, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075 "2006-10-19T12:03:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/61 "2006-10-22T00:03:02Z")
I’m teaching a class. As a minor part of the class, I asked the students to turn in a copy of their resumes. Many of my students don’t apparently understand what an appropriate “objective” on a resume is–hint: it isn’t “to get a job in an exciting, fast-paced industry” Be specific! Anyway, one student’s objective read "to peruse a job . . . " I looked at that, and looked at that, and finally wrote “persue” next to it. I looked at that, and looked at that, and finally, as I went to hand the resume back to the student, borrowed a pen, crossed out “persue” and wrote “pursue”. I was absurdly happy to have figured out the correct way to spell the word. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/62 "2006-10-22T00:35:16Z")
> [@brewha](#): > > There’s an Asian buffet in my home town. I certainly am not trying to racist, but there seems to be something lost in translation when it comes to their signs. At the cashier station at the front of the restaurant, there’s a sign that says “Wait for Seat”. It’s a professionally done sign; maybe they didn’t want to spend the money on the extra article. What cracks me up is that none of the signs above the food items are pluralized. One time I went there and under the sign that said “Green Bean”, there was just one green bean sitting in the tray. There must not be such things as “plural nouns” in some Asian languages. Many Korean-run businesses in NYC will advertise (often on professionally done signs) that they sell “HAT, CAP, WATCH”, or that there is 'SEATING UPSTAIR". [QUOTE=BarnOwl] And by the way, some of the smartest people here at SDMB cannot seem to spell “weird” correctly. They type "wierd’ consistently which I find weird because otherwise their spelling is perfect. [/QUOTE] I used to use _wierd_ as a matter of choice, just because it looked a little…wierd. That don’t fly here, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/63 "2006-10-22T00:39:37Z")
[QUOTE=AHunter3] Taped to outside of studio door: **ATTENTENT’N!!** Caution, Fliming! I picture the person weilding the magic marker getting confused and annoyed at running out of space on the top line and having to abbreviate “ATTENTION” like that… [/QUOTE] …especially since the abbreviation is actually _longer than the word._ I suspect the writer had attentention deficit disorder. ---
**Author:** ![Electrical\_Storm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ac8455/32.png) [@Electrical\_Storm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electrical_Storm)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/64 "2006-10-22T01:01:26Z")
I might have posted about this a while back, but reminds me of the large chain department store (well, at least the branch I worked in all those years ago) that has this sign on the doors of all the “employee-only” areas: “Employes Only” Sheesh. Couldn’t get this mega-million-bucks company to shell out a few bucks to replace the signs. Seriously. Purchasing didn’t go for it. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![BarnOwl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e95f7d/32.png) [@BarnOwl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BarnOwl)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/65 "2006-10-22T01:58:10Z")
[QUOTE=Eureka] I’m teaching a class. As a minor part of the class, I asked the students to turn in a copy of their resumes. Many of my students don’t apparently understand what an appropriate “objective” on a resume is–hint: it isn’t “to get a job in an exciting, fast-paced industry” Be specific! Anyway, one student’s objective read "to peruse a job . . . " I looked at that, and looked at that, and finally wrote “persue” next to it. I looked at that, and looked at that, and finally, as I went to hand the resume back to the student, borrowed a pen, crossed out “persue” and wrote “pursue”. I was absurdly happy to have figured out the correct way to spell the word. [/QUOTE] I am truly glad for you, **Eureka** , but I will never get ‘pursue’ right. When I leave here and have to write that word in, say, an e-mail, I will have to pause to mull,“…per or pur…oh crap, I’ll use a synonym I’m sure of.” ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/66 "2006-10-22T06:07:43Z")
My current favorite gripe is the Army and Air Force Exchange Service’s motto: > [@](#): > > We save you money everyday! Every time I encounter one of the managerial staff, I point at the sign and ask them why they have a misspelled motto. I’m nice about it, too. I even explain why the correct version is > [@](#): > > We save you money every day. Deer have nothing on these folks for vacant looks. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/67 "2006-10-22T19:45:36Z")
I saw a sign in a restaurant once which I am sure is not unique: Please wait for the hostess to be seated (Why the hell should anyone wait for her to be seated? She’s not one of the customers!) ---
**Author:** ![rinni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f6c823/32.png) [@rinni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rinni)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/68 "2006-10-23T10:11:40Z")
Oh man, I love this thread in general, but **AHunter3** and **Beware of Doug** with the ATTENTENT’N made me laugh so hard I cried and woke up my boyfriend. No exaggeration at all. I have a few that aren’t that funny, but I’ll toss them in to be more on topic. There is an Internet cafe near our apartment which advertises WORLD OF WARCRART. There is also a Vietnamese place which offers Vietnamses food. (Gollum: “Myyyy Vietnamses! We loves them, yes we does…”) And this one doesn’t really count as Fun with English, more like Fun with Misinterpreting Vietnamese: There also used to be another Vietnamese place called PHO BICH NGA. You can imagine what people actually called this. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/69 "2006-10-23T14:45:46Z")
I was watching the Miami Ink marathon yesterday and saw the guy get his "Get Busy Livin’ or Get Busy Dyin’ " tat. It was a gorgeous skull and cobra. I couldn’t see the whole of the last word but I could swear it started “die”. I can’t find it in the galleries but I got two looks at it and did not see a “dy”. And that’s permanent, dude! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![brewha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/70 "2006-10-23T18:08:03Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] I was watching the Miami Ink marathon yesterday and saw the guy get his "Get Busy Livin’ or Get Busy Dyin’ " tat. It was a gorgeous skull and cobra. I couldn’t see the whole of the last word but I could swear it started “die”. I can’t find it in the galleries but I got two looks at it and did not see a “dy”. And that’s permanent, dude! :smack: [/QUOTE] I got one worse than that. A friend of mine told me this story. He and and not very bright friend of his were drinking and NVBF decided to tatoo the words “Judas Priest” on his forearm himself. NVBF showed my friend his work when he was done. My friend told him that he had spelled it wrong. NVBF goes to work with a lighter to try to burn the “ie” in Priest off of his arm. He had tattoo’d “Jud **u** s Priest” and all he would have had to do was put a line across the “u” to make it an “a” - he had spelled Priest correctly. Now, and for the rest of his life, he has "Judus Pr(big nasty scar)st on his forearm. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/71 "2006-10-23T18:38:13Z")
These are part of the instructions that came with our digital kitchen scales :- \*Warning Keep the scale away from Children The scale is for family use The scale should be put and taken with care , avoid falling down or hard impacting The scale can not be disassembled by unprofessional people in case that its accuracy Will be debased or it will be damaged\* ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/72 "2006-10-23T18:40:29Z")
[QUOTE=Ignatz] Seen today outside a church- ``` OUR ``` CH RCH IS MISSING SOMETHING [/QUOTE] Maybe I’m getting whooshed here, but that’s the way the sign is supposed to be. It’s a joke, albeit not a very good one. What is the church missing? U (You). Get it? ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/73 "2006-10-23T18:59:17Z")
[QUOTE=chowder] ‘Body piercing while you wait’ [/QUOTE] I prefer a tattoo parlor that delivers. The medical magazine I work for had a classified ad that ended with the line: “Handicappers welcomed.” It took me a few seconds to realize what they were stabbing at – we’re an equal opportunity employer and people with disabilties are encouraged to apply. I wrote to the classified manager to let her know that according to the dictionary a handicapper was someone who set the odds on a horse race, but she insisted the client wanted it that way. Sheesh. When I lived in Austin there was a sign on a junk shop on that read AUNTIE PONUERS After about the 30th time seeing it I finally figured out what they meant: entrepreneurs. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/74 "2006-10-23T19:23:03Z")
[QUOTE=Polerius] Check out [Gallery of ‘‘Misused’’ Quotation Marks](http://www.juvalamu.com/qmarks) [/QUOTE] I think you just made me head explode. I had a boyfriend once who hand wrote me a long (10+ pages), impassioned letter after I broke up with him. Everytime he wanted to emphasize something, he put it in quotation marks. I briefly considered marking it up with red pen and sending it back to him (the letter was all about the many, many things wrong with me, you see), but didn’t want to continue the interaction at all. [QUOTE=Ignatz] SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY [/QUOTE] Well, they just grow up to be Slow Men Working. ---
**Author:** ![velvetjones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5f9b8f/32.png) [@velvetjones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/velvetjones)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075/75 "2006-10-23T20:05:33Z")
There’s a restaurant (now closed) near my place that has a huge sign out by the road advertising what style of food they serve. It reads: La Casa (something) Restaurant Cuban, Mexican, Spain Cuisine I never did get to try any of that Spain cuisine as they closed about 2 months after they opened. I’m not even certain they ever had any customers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fun-with-english/377075.md?page=3)