# Funniest single line in a song? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 5, 2003, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773 "2003-10-05T23:47:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/41 "2003-10-06T16:12:50Z")
_Well, I might as well go back over yonder Way back yonder 'cross the hill 'Cause if my baby don’t love me no more I know her sister will._ -Jimi Hendirx, Red House ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/42 "2003-10-06T17:30:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by slu \* > \*\* > > Kid Rock has another good one: “I’m in it to win it like Yzerman, can drink about 15 Heinekins” > > Don’t remember the name of that song though. Wasting Time\*\* I like the line from\*\* Cowboy:\*\* “I ain’t no G, I’m just a regular failure I ain’t straight outta Compton I’m straight out the trailer Cuss like a sailor…drink like a Mick My only words of wisdom are just -Radio Edit” (you have to fill in the Radio Edit line) **The Bloodhound Gang - Fire Water Burn** I’m not black like Barry White no I am white like Frank Black is So if man is five and the devil is six than that must make me seven This honkey’s gone to heaven. The first line’s clever, but how many people get the Pixies reference in the rest of it. Way back in 1972, **Alice Cooper** had this in **School’s Out.** “Well, we got no class And we got no principals And we got no innocence We can’t even think of a word that rhymes” ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/43 "2003-10-06T18:27:34Z")
**What’s My Age Again?** by _Blink182_ has this gem: “Later on, on the drive home I called her mom, from a pay phone I said I was the cops And your husband’s in jail The state looks down on sodomy” ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/44 "2003-10-06T18:48:40Z")
“Is that supposed to be your poker face, or was someone run over by a train?” Opening line from Fountains of Wayne’s “No Better Place.” ---
**Author:** ![daldai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/278dde/32.png) [@daldai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/daldai)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/45 "2003-10-06T18:54:05Z")
Well i sat my monkey on a log In order to get him to do the dog He wagged his tail and shook his head Then he went and did the cat instead He’s a wierd monkey …Bod Dylan - I Shall Be Free No.10 ---
**Author:** ![ExpiringMind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ExpiringMind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExpiringMind)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/46 "2003-10-06T19:22:32Z")
The Stones are always good for laugh… “Sympathy For the Devil” - Just call me Lucifer 'Cause I’m in need of some restraint “Let It Bleed” - She said, “My breasts, they will always be open Baby, you can rest your weary head right on me And there will always be a space in my parking lot When you need a little coke and sympathy” “Hang Fire” - You know marrying money is a full time job I don’t need the aggravation I’m a lazy slob And others… “The Joker” - Steve Miller Really like your peaches wanna shake your tree “Ordinary Average Guy” - Joe Walsh And every Saturday we work in the yard Pick up the dog do Hope that it’s hard (woof woof) or the entire lyrics for “Life’s Been Good” - Joe Walsh ---
**Author:** ![MrSarcasticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@MrSarcasticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrSarcasticus)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/47 "2003-10-06T21:45:13Z")
“This is exciting. I never plooked A tiny chrome-plated Machine That looks like a Magical pig With marital aids Stuck all over it Such as yourself Before.” … “Speak to me Oh no… The golden shower Must have shorted out His master circuit He’s, he’s, oh my god I must have Plooked him… Hey To death… Hey” From SY BORG by Zappa ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/48 "2003-10-06T22:03:35Z")
> [@](#): > > or the entire lyrics for > “Life’s Been Good” - Joe Walsh \*\* My favorite line: “I can’t complain, but sometimes I still do.” How about **Dan Hicks** “How can I miss you when you won’t go away?” **Zappa’s** “Disco Boy” Disco Boy, no one understands But thank the Lord that you still got hands To help you do the jerkin’ That’ll drown out your disco sorrow ---
**Author:** ![darksight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@darksight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/darksight)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/49 "2003-10-06T22:06:40Z")
Never did like that dog from Tom Waits song Franks Wild Years ---
**Author:** ![darksight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3da27b/32.png) [@darksight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/darksight)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/50 "2003-10-06T22:08:00Z")
Ooooops I meant never could stand that dog ! ---
**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/51 "2003-10-06T22:19:25Z")
Well I think Phoebe’s misheard lyrics from _Tiny Dancer_ were pretty funny. “Hold me close, young Tony Danza.” Definitely not what was sung, but whenever I hear the song now I only hear her version of it. ---
**Author:** ![Chupacabra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Chupacabra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chupacabra)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2003, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/52 "2003-10-06T23:53:06Z")
I’m surprised nobody has gotten to these lyrics yet : _I left the cake out in the rain, And I worked so hard to make it, And it took so long to bake it, And I’ll never have that recipe again, oh no!_ From **MacArthur Park** written, in all seriouness, by Richard Harris. It is not hard to see why this song was elected the worst song in history in Dave Barry’s survey of awful songs. America is another band that inadvertently makes me laugh with their lyrics. From **Horse With No Name** _The heat was hot._ From **Sister Golden Hair** _Alligator Lizards in the air._ There are so many more examples from America, but those have to be my favorites. Whenever I hear them I laugh. ---
**Author:** ![pesch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pesch/32/4925_2.png) [@pesch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pesch)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/53 "2003-10-07T00:06:58Z")
Who would have thought Bob Dylan could be so funny? From “By and By” (Love and Theft album) By and by, i’m breathin’ a lover’s sigh While i’m sittin’ on my watch so i can be on time It took me several listening before I realized he was making a joke. I’ve written before about “Copacabana” on the SDMB, so I’ll only add a “me too” about the “and she lost her mind” line. Never has insanity sounded so appealing. ---
**Author:** ![Apoptosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba9def/32.png) [@Apoptosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apoptosis)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/54 "2003-10-07T00:24:55Z")
From **Beck** ’s “Debra”: “I wanna get with you, only you And your sister, I think her name’s Debra.” And in the same song: “I pick you up late at night after work, I said, ‘Lady, step inside my Hyundai.’” And finally: “Ain’t no use wastin’ no time gettin’ to know each other, You know the deal.” -Apoptosis ---
**Author:** ![robinh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@robinh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robinh)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/55 "2003-10-07T01:12:49Z")
from the Vandal’s _Lord of Dance_, which posits Michael whatshisname as the Second Coming… _A simple shuffle and a full plie, he’s making Zima out of Perrier_ ---
**Author:** ![WhetherMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8e7dd6/32.png) [@WhetherMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhetherMan)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/56 "2003-10-07T01:17:11Z")
**I threw off my flip flop and stepped on a popcorn…** As children, my sister and would howl with laughter at that line. There was just something funny about that visual. Yeah…yeah…I know now; that line doesn’t really go like that. We didn’t find out until much later in life that the actual line is, \*\*I threw off my flip flop and stepped on a pop \*\* _top_. ---
**Author:** ![greenphan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c37758/32.png) [@greenphan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greenphan)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/57 "2003-10-07T04:44:38Z")
For the life of me, I can’t think of the song name, but it’s one of the songs off of They Might Be Giants’ **Flood** : _Everybody wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads_. From Tom Waits… “The Piano Has Been Drinking”: _I only have a drinking problem when I don’t have a drink_ “Pasties and a G String”: _And I’m getting harder than Chinese algebra…ssieres_. And all of Eminem’s “Kill You”, especially the spoken last line: “I’m just clowning ladies; you know I love ya”. ---
**Author:** ![E.Thorp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@E.Thorp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E.Thorp)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/58 "2003-10-07T05:01:44Z")
Like a pizza in the rain, No one wants to take you home… (Talking Heads) ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/59 "2003-10-07T11:17:01Z")
I have to go with Tom Lehrer. Even if it’s out of date by 40 years. … Egypt’s gonna get one too, just to use on you know who. Now Israel’s getting tense, wants one in self-defense, “The Lord’s our shepard” says the Psalm, But just in case; we better get the bomb! … ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2003, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773/60 "2003-10-07T11:28:33Z")
Michael Jackson and Paul McCartny’s _other_ duet, “The Girl Is Mine”. As if the notion of The King of Pop lyrically fighting over a women isn’t hysterically amusing by itself, we have these classic lines sung by the two during a chatty moment set to music before the fade out. Mike’s subsequent sexual revelations make his lines the funnier. (Paul) Michael, we’re not going to fight about this, okay? (Michael) Paul, I think I told you – I’m a lover, not a fighter! (Paul) I’ve heard it all before, Michael, she told me that I’m her forever lover, you know, don’t you remember? (Michael) Well, after loving me, she said she couldn’t love another. (Paul) Is that what she said? (Michael) Yes, she said it, you keep dreaming! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funniest-single-line-in-a-song/205773.md?page=4)