# Funny Name Alert **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 17, 1999, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691 "1999-10-17T20:55:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/1 "1999-10-17T20:55:00Z")
Lets talk about funny names. I mean real names of real people, you have encountered. I worked for an alarm company at one time and when things got slow we would flip through our rolladex of subscribers and contacts searching for funny names. The best ones I have ever found were; female- Suzy Clapsaddle, male, Harry Dick. What names make you giggle? * * * Ayesha - Lioness * * * I’m out of my mind, but, feel free to leave a message ---
**Author:** ![\_00\_The\_Fool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/ed655f/32.png) [@\_00\_The\_Fool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_00_The_Fool)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/2 "1999-10-17T22:14:00Z")
There’s a SPEC racecar driver named Dick Trickle. . . * * * “Oh we were brought up on the Space-Race, now they expect us to clean toilets. When you have seen how big the world is how can you make do with this?” Pulp, “Glory Days” ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/3 "1999-10-17T22:30:00Z")
Damn. You two both covered the two stories I have on this subject, and I can offer no more… _sulking away from the thread, never to return_ * * * Yer pal, Satan ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/4 "1999-10-17T22:38:00Z")
I really hope the following people don’t look at this message board. There was a girl who attended my grade school for a year or two. Her name was Krystal Monument. I really hope she has changed her name. Also, in our local phone book, my friend and I found a listing for a Lyle P. Lilicrap. We prank called him until he unlisted his number. Hey, we were young and it was before caller ID. ---
**Author:** ![keystream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a3d4f5/32.png) [@keystream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/keystream)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/5 "1999-10-17T22:56:00Z")
Ben Dibble is a buddy of my cousin’s. A guy I knew in high school was Robert Dick (say it fast). ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/6 "1999-10-17T23:30:00Z")
I’ve come across several interesting names working at the library: Shivshank Christian B. Smart Johnny Walker John Goddi Benjamin R. Goode ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/7 "1999-10-17T23:43:00Z")
Dear Ayesha: In my younger days, I once tried to lay a girl called Candy Kane – that was her real name, I kid you not. In high school, I knew a cat named Dave Cave. When I lived in another county, there were many people with the surname Hunsucker. That one always cracked me up. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 1999, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/8 "1999-10-17T23:48:00Z")
My high school civics teacher’s name was Richard D. Dick. I used to book travel for a Robert Dinkfelter. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/9 "1999-10-18T00:09:00Z")
I’ll get the cliche out of the way first. I _did_ know a guy named Richard Head in HS. The ribbing was perpetual and, in his case, he responded well and was quite an outgoing guy. I know two people named John John (father and son). I have a friend who’s last name is a pretty common English name, but in keeping w/a family tradition that extends from his grandfather to his eldest son, his first name is Z and his middle name is W. Anyone have an Austin phone book? Henador Titzoff was in there for years. ---
**Author:** ![Sylence](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b19c9b/32.png) [@Sylence](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylence)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/10 "1999-10-18T00:50:00Z")
Dr. Fink is a pediatrician in Greeley, Colorado. – Sylence * * * “The problem with reality is the lack of background music.” – Anon ---
**Author:** ![Boris\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@Boris\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boris_B)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/11 "1999-10-18T01:13:00Z")
Congressman Richard Swett of Connnecticut. Goes by Dick. At my high school, one of the administrator went by Kitty. Her last name was Katz. Not kidding. I still think Yogi Berra is a pretty funny name, although I know Yogi Bear was named after Yogi Berra. ---
**Author:** ![AzRaek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/azraek/32/16739_2.png) [@AzRaek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AzRaek)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/12 "1999-10-18T01:44:00Z")
There’s a realtor here in Denver named Dick Berst. He’s got a few bus-bench ads on my way to work. * * * “On the edge of sleep, I awoke to a sun so bright…” ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/13 "1999-10-18T01:55:00Z")
My uncle told me he once made a prank calls to every Lipschitz in the phone book, saying, “If your lip shits, does your asshole whistle?” ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/14 "1999-10-18T03:17:00Z")
Went to school with a couple of girls named…Megan Mustard and Pearl Pepper Also we have a philanthropist here named Harry Hole * * * We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another ---
**Author:** ![Zulu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a9adbd/32.png) [@Zulu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zulu)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/15 "1999-10-18T03:56:00Z")
My dad is a letter carrier. There’s a person on his route named ‘A. Maggot’ I’ve seen the mailbox and letters myself. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/16 "1999-10-18T03:58:00Z")
My middle name is kind of funny-ish. But not really. 😉 * * * “To me, socks are like sex. Tons of it about, and I don’t seem to get any.” [The Legend Of PigeonMan](http://www.hotkey.net.au/~guanolad/pigeonman/main.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Kakkerlak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bb73d2/32.png) [@Kakkerlak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kakkerlak)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/17 "1999-10-18T04:13:00Z")
I once worked for Sam Dick Industries in Seattle. Everybody called the old man who owned the company by his first name. I was once very much in love with a girl named Lisa Whynot. I seldom argued with her. In the class of actual strange names, I met a girl whose niece was named INXS. Not initials, that was her first name. Hippie names can be good. Novalotus Merry is in my buddy’s vet class. I hear she’s a babe. * * * “You can’t tell me what sucks!” - Beavis, a true Objectivist ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/18 "1999-10-18T04:26:00Z")
Micheal Hunt. Went by Mike. * * * ‘They couldn’t hit an Elephant from this dist…!’ Last words of General John Sedgwick ---
**Author:** ![Sancho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Sancho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sancho)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/19 "1999-10-18T04:29:00Z")
I swear to God that I went to school with someone name Anita Boner. Supposedly pronounced “Bone-Are,” but you know how cruel kids can be ---
**Author:** ![nasargent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bc8723/32.png) [@nasargent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nasargent)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 1999, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691/20 "1999-10-18T04:49:00Z")
A friend from work used to laugh about funny names we ran across. Some of our favorites: William McWeeney (went by Willie) Betty Buffalo Maximum Payne In the New Orleans phonebook years ago: Boonrut Tantriphal [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-name-alert/10691.md?page=2)