# Funny Real Life Names **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 13, 2007, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773 "2007-03-13T18:20:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WorkInProgress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@WorkInProgress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WorkInProgress)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/1 "2007-03-13T18:20:26Z")
Disclaimer! If you have an offensive or funny name, turn back now. We are having a laugh at your expense. What is the funniest real name you have ever come across? Can you prove it? For example you can look up a Mike Hunt at [www.whitepages.com](http://www.whitepages.com). If the name requires explanation, please list it as a spoiler. A gentleman that used to work at my company was named Richard Sukoff. This name can also be found in the white pages for GA. ---
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/2 "2007-03-13T18:26:04Z")
My husband works for Wellpoint. The CEO’s name is Larry Glasscock. Sure, it would be funnier if he were Harry Glasscock, but Glasscock by itself is enough to make me giggle any day. ---
**Author:** ![brendon\_small](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brendon_small/32/17101_2.png) [@brendon\_small](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brendon_small)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/3 "2007-03-13T18:29:30Z")
When I was in high school, we went to Florida for a cross country team race. I was digging through the phone book and we found a name that was hilarous (to a bunch of teenage guys). It was Phillip Ennis. We thought it would be pronounced Phillip Enis (Phil-lip-penis) so it was funny to us. Yeah, we were dorks… Apparently, it’s a common name…see [here](http://www.whitepages.com/10001/log_feature/pers_search_w_email/search/FindPerson?firstname_begins_with=1&firstname=phillip&name=ennis&city_zip=&state_id=&default_listing=phone&extra_listing=mixed). ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/4 "2007-03-13T18:32:09Z")
Why, yes, I can! Mike Hunt in Los Alamos, New Mexico. I knew a guy named Richard Overly. Dick Ovaries My dad knew a guy named Phil Maestas. Found one listed in Corrales. Feel my estas, Spanish slang for package ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/5 "2007-03-13T18:38:48Z")
In 7th grade I went to school with Paisley Boney IV. What got me is that there were three Paisley Boneys before him. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/6 "2007-03-13T18:45:35Z")
I grew up, in a river town, with a girl named Sandy Banks. ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/7 "2007-03-13T18:53:31Z")
I worked with a doctor named Harry Knukels (knuckles) I went to grade school with Kimberly Clark (we called her Kleenex) ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/8 "2007-03-13T18:56:37Z")
In grade school there was a kid named Mark Smellie. Apparently, there is a Mark Smellie (a.k.a. “Smeeks”) in the band [Exploited](http://bandtoband.com/index.php?Page=Search&ArtistId=25028). It doesn’t seem to be too uncommon a name, either. Until recently there was a radio host on Ontario radio station [CJRT](http://www.broadcasting-history.ca/listings_and_histories/radio/histories.php?id=418&historyID=199) (a.k.a. Jazz FM) named Glen Woodcock. (My dad’s a jazz musician so I’m exposed to all sort of Jazz stuff) ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/9 "2007-03-13T18:58:05Z")
Wow…uhhmm…ok. I went to school with the following people: Douglas and Cedar Fir (brothers) Joseph Self For cite/proof, you will have to wait til I get home and can scan my yearbook. A guy I knew in school always said when he had a kid, he was going to name him Justin. His last name is Case. I don’t know if he ever had a son or not. I think the name Michael Hunt is actually fairly common. When I managed a pizza delivery joint, we had a driver with that name. It always made me giggle when a customer would call to complain about him and I would have to tell them that his name was Mike. Last name Hunt. I always had to explain that I was serious and they were welcome to call our corporate office to verify it. I think the only reason he never got fired (he was a HORRIBLE employee and stinky to boot) was for the giggle factor of his name. ---
**Author:** ![brewha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/10 "2007-03-13T19:00:41Z")
My dad has a cousin named George Bush (not that one) who named his daughter Rose. I know a guy named Mike Hok. It’s pronouced more like hoke than hock, but it sounds like your saying “My cock” with a funny accent. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/11 "2007-03-13T19:02:21Z")
Kellen Heller. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/12 "2007-03-13T19:05:04Z")
I had a math professor once whose last name was Weiner. Whenever anyone asked a question, they would say “Professor Wine-er,” out of respect. Always, he would then adamantly insist “It’s pronounced WEENER.” Penis ensued. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/13 "2007-03-13T19:26:35Z")
When I was growing up in Charleston, WV, there was a man by the name of Hogjaw Twaddle listed in the phone directory. A man by the name of Peter Beter (who was apparently a well-known conspiracy theorist) ran for governor of West Virginia when I was a kid. Full name was Peter David Beter, so his name was often given in the newspapers as Peter D. Beter. ---
**Author:** ![Raza](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raza/32/213_2.png) [@Raza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raza)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/14 "2007-03-13T19:27:21Z")
A local realtor is Vivianna Winterbottom; I just find the name funny for some reason. When I was a teenager, the pastor of our very large church was Peter Lord. While doing genealogy research through a cemetery I was surprised to see several Bozo headstones; I had not realized it was an actual surname. On the flip side, I think Wolf Blitzer has to be one of the coolest names ever. And Max Power, of course. And for fictional names, Click-and-Clack’s chauffer P. Kupp Andropov always cracks me up. ---
**Author:** ![rhythmonly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee59a6/32.png) [@rhythmonly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhythmonly)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/15 "2007-03-13T19:28:43Z")
I was in the Navy with a Seaman Seimen and a Petty Officer Petty. ---
**Author:** ![mlerose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@mlerose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlerose)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/16 "2007-03-13T19:28:48Z")
I am personally aquainted with a man named Dick Johnson. I’m sure that’s a pretty common one as well. ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/17 "2007-03-13T19:34:48Z")
My wife, in an elementary school class, had a student whose parents had moved from Vietnam to the US in the preceding summer. The poor child’s name: Phuc Huu Ho. The school explained to the parents that it would be best to if he went by Huu. ---
**Author:** ![Smitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Smitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smitty)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/18 "2007-03-13T19:42:59Z")
I had a classmate named Harry Hickey. ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/19 "2007-03-13T19:47:59Z")
There was a kid in my seventh-grade class whose name was Harry Sex. This provided endless amusement to those of us who had unfunny names. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/20 "2007-03-13T19:48:25Z")
My dad used to keep a business card on the fridge that he got from a realtor named Rose E. Kuntz. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773.md?page=2)