# Funny Real Life Names **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 13, 2007, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773 "2007-03-13T18:20:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Burrido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Burrido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Burrido)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/21 "2007-03-13T19:50:05Z")
My personal favorite [http://img66.imageshack.us/img66/16/image135jq9.jpg](http://img66.imageshack.us/img66/16/image135jq9.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![WorkInProgress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@WorkInProgress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WorkInProgress)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/22 "2007-03-13T20:11:54Z")
I also went to high school with a Rod Johnson, a porn name if I ever heard one. ---
**Author:** ![brewha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/23 "2007-03-13T20:16:34Z")
[QUOTE=Miller] My dad used to keep a business card on the fridge that he got from a realtor named Rose E. Kuntz. [/QUOTE] In college, I had a professor Kuntz - pronounced koontz though. ---
**Author:** ![Emilio\_Lizardo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Emilio\_Lizardo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emilio_Lizardo)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/24 "2007-03-13T20:19:33Z")
In my grade school we had a girl named Tajma Hall and another named Candy Graham, who had a younger brother named Tiger. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/25 "2007-03-13T20:20:02Z")
My mother was supposed to see a Dr. DiMento last year. I remember finding a Web listing for him; I’ll post it if I can find his first name. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/26 "2007-03-13T20:20:16Z")
I know a Mike Hock. Also, in my hometown, years ago there was an obituary for a Harold “Harry” Dick. ---
**Author:** ![Jelymag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jelymag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jelymag)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/27 "2007-03-13T20:20:50Z")
While in college I babysat a little boy whose last name was Peed. He got picked on a lot. Any time the teacher said “Billy Peed” all the boys would say “Ewwww!” Poor kid. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/28 "2007-03-13T20:32:04Z")
There was a guy named Wright Nee a couple of years behind me in my high school. Unfortunately, Googling the name brings up only a string of references to such women as “Katherine Wright nee Douglas”. My brother knew a girl who went by the anagrammatic name of Norma Roman – she herself doesn’t show up in the first few pages of a search, but happens to have a fairly famous [actress namesake](http://imdb.com/name/nm0738746/bio) (see **Birth Name** on the linked page). ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/29 "2007-03-13T20:42:37Z")
The best one I’ve got: The head of the Pennsylvania Higher Education Assistance Agency is a guy named [Dick Willey](http://www.pennlive.com/news/patriotnews/index.ssf?/base/news/1172721311123610.xml&coll=1). As of late, Mr. Willey has been in the news a lot lately because of some financial shenanigans. Robin ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/30 "2007-03-13T20:53:27Z")
I just can’t get over the fact that there’s someone in this world named [Dick Trickle](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick_Trickle) and he’s famous and he _never changed it!_ Every time I hear it I have to have this mental conversation with myself: E1: “Dick Trickle?” E2: “Yes, unfortunately, after the surgery.” Which _also_ reminds me of one of my husband’s favorite real-life jokes. Looking for athletic shoes, he walked into Rack Room Shoes. A clerk told him they didn’t have the model he was looking for, then asked helpfully, gesturing to a store nearby, “Have you tried [Dick’s](http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/home/index.jsp)?” Husband: “Yes, and it left a really bad taste in my mouth.” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Sock\_of\_Doom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71c47a/32.png) [@Sock\_of\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sock_of_Doom)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/31 "2007-03-13T21:16:31Z")
A professor here at Penn State is Harry Allcock. I can’t even look at the guy without snickering. ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/32 "2007-03-13T21:24:48Z")
A friend just got married. His wife’s name is pronounced “on uh”, and his last name is a euphemism for a penis. Sounds like she’s “On a Penis” ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/33 "2007-03-13T21:30:22Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] Which _also_ reminds me of one of my husband’s favorite real-life jokes. Looking for athletic shoes, he walked into Rack Room Shoes. A clerk told him they didn’t have the model he was looking for, then asked helpfully, gesturing to a store nearby, “Have you tried [Dick’s](http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/home/index.jsp)?” Husband: “Yes, and it left a really bad taste in my mouth.” 😛 [/QUOTE] \ On a related note – my daughter and I were at the local mall, which is just up the road from the local Dick’s. We happened to see a guy wearing his lanyard/name badge from said sporting goods store. My daughter, knowing her mother has no shame, pointed it out to me. Of course, I leaned over and in a stage whisper said “dude? your Dick’s showing!” He looked at me as if he were about to pee himself, then realised that I was pointing a little high for what he was thinking and giggled. We then saw the same guy later at a different store with (apparently) one of his coworkers. My daughter did the same thing to the girl who blushed and giggled when she realised what my daughter meant. \ I had a professor at college whose last name was spelled Roach. He insisted that it was a French name and should be pronounced “Row.” Whatever, dude. If it helps you sleep at night… ---
**Author:** ![Rich\_Mann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@Rich\_Mann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rich_Mann)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/34 "2007-03-13T21:32:37Z")
I once had a real estate client who went by Tony Ho. He and his sister immigrated from Hong Kong. It wasn’t until we got to know each other pretty well that he told me that his name was really Fuk Yung Ho and his sister was Suk Ing (or Ng) Ho. The really funny part is that their mother was British! Nobody ever believes me, and I can’t prove it, but that’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it. ---
**Author:** ![Bobotheoptimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/919ad9/32.png) [@Bobotheoptimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bobotheoptimist)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/35 "2007-03-13T21:44:34Z")
I’ve no penis related names to share, but I went to high school with a girl named Candi Barr. Then there was the obligatory customer with a name very much like Phouk Yu ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/36 "2007-03-13T21:58:58Z")
I know a bank teller (not that her profession is significant) named Aneeda Gnapp. (Pronounced “I need a nap.”) Her parents were, I believe, Polish, and did not realize the sound of the name in English. I also once had a student named Princess Bernard. One of my older students commented, on seeing her name on a piece of homework, “There’s a Freshman named 'Princess Bernard? What, does she have a brother named ‘Saint?’” A classmate of my daughter’s was named Brandy Coffee. ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/37 "2007-03-13T22:13:41Z")
I went to high school with Sandra Beech. Yes, she went by Sandy. I got to be fairly good friends with her my senior year…nice girl. ---
**Author:** ![sjc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@sjc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sjc)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/38 "2007-03-13T22:39:34Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] \ On a related note – my daughter and I were at the local mall, which is just up the road from the local Dick’s. We happened to see a guy wearing his lanyard/name badge from said sporting goods store. My daughter, knowing her mother has no shame, pointed it out to me. Of course, I leaned over and in a stage whisper said “dude? your Dick’s showing!” He looked at me as if he were about to pee himself, then realised that I was pointing a little high for what he was thinking and giggled. We then saw the same guy later at a different store with (apparently) one of his coworkers. My daughter did the same thing to the girl who blushed and giggled when she realised what my daughter meant. \ I had a professor at college whose last name was spelled Roach. He insisted that it was a French name and should be pronounced “Row.” Whatever, dude. If it helps you sleep at night… [/QUOTE] There is a well known fast food joint in Seattle called Dick’s. I always thought it was funny to hear frat boys saying “well, I’m going to go eat Dick’s”. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/39 "2007-03-13T22:41:12Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] A guy I knew in school always said when he had a kid, he was going to name him Justin. His last name is Case. I don’t know if he ever had a son or not. [/QUOTE] There’s a DJ named Justin Case here. There’s another Justin \_\_\_ DJ name that’s even more of a groaner but of course I can’t think of it. What with my pronouncing Harry and hairy differently, some of these are lost on me. ---
**Author:** ![Bobotheoptimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/919ad9/32.png) [@Bobotheoptimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bobotheoptimist)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2007, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773/40 "2007-03-13T22:52:30Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] \ On a related note – my daughter and I were at the local mall, which is just up the road from the local Dick’s. We happened to see a guy wearing his lanyard/name badge from said sporting goods store. My daughter, knowing her mother has no shame, pointed it out to me. Of course, I leaned over and in a stage whisper said “dude? your Dick’s showing!” He looked at me as if he were about to pee himself, then realised that I was pointing a little high for what he was thinking and giggled. We then saw the same guy later at a different store with (apparently) one of his coworkers. My daughter did the same thing to the girl who blushed and giggled when she realised what my daughter meant. \ [/QUOTE] To continue the hijack, the website for Dick’s Sporting Goods is not, **not** I say, tripdub dicks dot com. Had to call up IT and explain that one, I did. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-real-life-names/395773.md?page=3)