# Funny/strange/notable church billboards **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 11, 2005, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512 "2005-11-11T01:47:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/21 "2005-11-11T19:20:16Z")
Just saw one recently over Halloween weekend: “Heaven is no trick, and Hell is no treat” I’m glad to see they had a sense of humor and weren’t one of those ‘halloween is evil’ type churches. ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2005, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/22 "2005-11-11T19:21:20Z")
A local church nearby had “Jesus, the first Jedi.” :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2005, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/23 "2005-11-11T23:40:22Z")
Outside of St. Paul’s Community Church in IL: “Tell the truth, even if you have to lie.” I have never understood it. Used it as a sig line for awhile elsewhere, but 😕 ---
**Author:** ![baronsabato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed655f/32.png) [@baronsabato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/baronsabato)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/24 "2005-11-12T11:48:53Z")
Outside what I believe was the Lutheran Church here in Santa Cruz: “This church is prayer-conditioned” in the blazing heat of summer. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/25 "2005-11-12T14:56:08Z")
Up in the NC mountains sits Bat Cave Baptist Church. I guess the caped crusader wants to save his soul when he’s not fighting crime. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/26 "2005-11-12T14:59:05Z")
Holy Pop Icon! ---
**Author:** ![davmilasav](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@davmilasav](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davmilasav)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/27 "2005-11-12T17:49:16Z")
The church I used to pass by in Dickinson, TX once had a sign out front reading MEMBERS ONLY TRESPASSERS WILL BE BAPTIZED “Don’t mess with Texas,” indeed! ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/28 "2005-11-12T18:47:11Z")
There’s a church not too far away from here named the “Christ Evangelical Free Church”. I’m no fan of evangelicals, but isn’t that taking it a bit far? Maybe they’re offering a free evangelical with every Christ? ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/29 "2005-11-12T18:58:42Z")
YOU CAN BAPTIZE A CAT A HUNDRED TIMES BUT IT WILL NEVER GO TO HEAVEN 😕 ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/30 "2005-11-12T19:01:41Z")
I saw this one in my neighborhood recently, and got a big kick out of it JESUS DIED TO TAKE AWAY YOUR SINS NOT YOUR MINDS We’re not all crazy you know. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/31 "2005-11-12T19:33:10Z")
> [@Trillionaire](#): > > Ch\_\_ch > > What’s Missing? Ur That one’s up now nearby. It’s cute. Took me a minute to figure it out, because whoever put up the letters didn’t put dashes or lines in the UR space. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/32 "2005-11-12T19:58:37Z")
> [@delphica](#): > > JESUS DIED TO TAKE AWAY YOUR SINS > > NOT YOUR MINDS That was _brilliant_. I’m taking up a collection to use it next Sunday. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![groman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@groman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/groman)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/33 "2005-11-12T20:40:17Z")
I saw one “God adds and multiply [sic] while devil subtract [sic] and subtract [sic]” … WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? And should it be “devil subtracts and divides” or something? ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/34 "2005-11-12T21:07:41Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > **DUSTY BIBLES LEAD TO DIRTY LIVES** > > What does that mean anyway? Presumably, a dusty Bible is never being read. So not reading the Bible leads to dirty minds. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/35 "2005-11-12T21:15:30Z")
In Montgomery, AL there’s a minister at one small church whose name is pronounced “dee-MAHN”, but that’s not how he spells it. It’s always odd to see on the billboard that week’s sermon and 'presented by Pastor Demon Jones’. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/36 "2005-11-12T21:39:19Z")
> [@delphica](#): > > JESUS DIED TO TAKE AWAY YOUR SINS > > NOT YOUR MINDS That needs to be a bumper sticker, as silly as bumper stickers are. Brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Corrvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@Corrvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corrvin)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512/37 "2005-11-13T03:05:38Z")
“Jesus got the ultimate body piercing” Gives me a giggle. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/funny-strange-notable-church-billboards/330512.md?page=1)