Ok I got three that I give me a chuckle:
The first is something odd I saw driving down the road near my house the other day.
I am driving down the street and on the other side I see a man with a cardboard sign that says something like “Viet Nam vet, homeless, please help, God Bless” Your standard sign. I pull up to the red light on the corner and see a Mercedes pull up next to him. I think to myself, thats nice, the rich guy is going to give him some money. Rich guy precedes to get out of the car, he is dressed in rags, takes the sign from the panhandler, and the panhandler gets in the car and drives off.
My jaw just about hit the floor. I had heard about the so called “shift changes” before, but actually witnessing one was fairly surreal
Next is about the single best experience I have ever had with a panhandler, not actually funny, but kinda cool.
I am out on a date in Pasadena, CA (near Los Angeles) and a man comes up to us and says that he is the wandering poet of Pasadena, that he is homeless and makes his living selling his poems on the street.
I admit that this is a better way than most and agree to buy a poem for 2 dollars, figuring that even if it is a piece of junk I throw away this guy put a little effort into his pitch. He thanks me for the two dollars and says that he feels bad just giving us one of his own poems so he will give us some Shakespeare too. It is at this point that I realize that when he say’s “give us a poem” he means recite the poetry.
He proceeds to recite 2 Shakespeare sonnets, rather beautifully I might add, and then says now he will give us our poem. Our poem, was actually about us, using details from our appearance (commenting on the girl I was with’s dress if I remember right) and was delivered in, as close as I could tell, perfect iambic pentameter. I was totally impressed, and he thanked us gave the girl I was with a flower and walked off. Single best experience I have ever had with a panhandler, ever.
The next story would have been frightening if it hadn’t occurred while standing in line for a movie on a busy street. This became a favorite story for my girlfriend and I to tell for a long time.
A man walked up to the movie theater my girlfriend and I were standing outside while waiting in line to see a rerelease of Rear Window. You can smell this guy from down the block, he absolutely reeks of alcohol. He is going down the line of people asking everyone for some change so they can buy a hotdog across the street. He gets to me, and instead of asking for money, looks at me for a minute and says “You a musician?” I admit that I was indeed a musician. He says, “I could tell, I could tell. I can always spot a musician, You know I used to play with Hendrix back in the day” I say something like “oh, really how great for you” and he launches into a 3 1/2 minute air guitar solo (at least it felt like it was 3 1/2 minutes, it was probably about 20 seconds.)
He snaps out of it chuckling to himself, looks at my girlfriend and says “hey, that’s a nice peacoat” (she was wearing a peacoat), “I used to have a peacoat like that.” He looks at her for a few more seconds, then says “wait a minute, THATS MY PEACOAT! Give me back my peacoat.” We look at each other not sure what to do, when he says, “no no, its ok, I’ll let you have it for a dollar” :eek:
At this point the movie theater opens and we are able to leave him behind.
I am now also remembering the homeless lady that lived near my high school who carried a tree around in a wagon, and the time when I was 14 and my school bus passed a guy sittin at a bus stop with this legs spread wide and a giant hole in his crotch, with no underwear.
Guess I’ve got lots of homeless people stories…I love LA!
