Funny Stuff That Never Gets Old

Monty Python has, for the most part, survived being quoted to death by nerds. Sure, you can have too much of it, but it truly was brilliant.

Ripping Yarns (“Call me School Bully, you silly little headmaster”)

Police Squad / Naked Gun

Fawlty Towers (the Hitler impersonation, beating his car with a branch and calling it a vicious bastard, the moose practicing English, the Major reminiscing about taking the girl to India,and of course, “Spoons, eh? sthpppppppooooons!”…)

Pink Panther movies

“The Party”

The Simpsons

South Park

The original Police Academy movie

The second Police Academy movie, but only because of Bobcat Goldthwait

Black Adder

Get Smart

“What are you doing?” “I am scaring away the elephants.”

Frasier

Welcome Back Kotter (yes, really)

The original Flying High / Airport movie

The Blues Bros (“Holy fuck, Penguin!”)

For me it is the late Victor Borge.
Most especially his verbal punctuation and inflationary language routines.
They bring me to tears every time.
Pure comic genius!

Marx Brothers.
" We’re past tense now, we’re in bungalows."

“Viaduct? I dunno, why not a goose?”

“What ever it is, I’m against it!”

Monty Python

Mo Rocca & Jon Stewart & Lewis Black

Steve Martin

His Girl Friday

Pirate!

Letterman, Leno and Conan

Fraiser

The dopers who wrote, " An Open Letter to My Pet." & " I stood next to the emperor of the world at McDonalds." and the immortal, " The Horror of Blimps." Nearly pee my pants every time I read it.

The Onion thread to 9-11. Farking brilliant, people.

Casablanca – for some reason it’s not regarded as a comedy movie, but some of its lines are absolute gems.

And Margaret Cho’s I’m the One that I Want.

Yesterday a colleague and I were discussing the loads on a space launch vehicle, and an Air Force officer, possibly a captain, passing by says, “Huh huh, you said load

The old Sprint commercial with Richard Simmons.

The American Idol audition of Keith singing “Like a Virgin”. Oh heavens. I laugh until I hurt.

That was such a great band. When I saw them on the Soul Rotation tour at IUP, Rodney (I think) stopped the band , pulled out his flute and said “Let ME bring you songs from the wood”, and proceeded to play a Jethro Tull riff. What made it even better was that, since 99% of the audience were college and high school kids and a good ten years younger than me, they most likely didn’t get the joke.

They still maintain and update their website. there’s tons of good stuff there, check it out.

Jon

On SDMB it’s the OP in that thread My Anger Burns with the Heat of Million Suns (or something like that). The whole thing is so damn funny, like how he’s mad at the snack machine guy for making him eat the junk food. BUT there is nothing funnier than when he confesses that, until he was 24, he thought Jerry Lewis and Jerry Lee Lewis were the same guy. I’m laughing right now thinking of “Goodness gracious great balls of heyyyyy layyyyyyddddddddddy.!”

The creator of Spite Magazine gives visitors a tour of his Manhattan apartment.

Seen it hundreds of times and it never fails to crack me up.

For me, it’s the greatest Knock Knock joke of all time.

Simply look at someone and say, “I have a Knock Knock joke”

Then they’ll say, “Ok”

Then you say, “you have to start”

And they’ll say, “Oh…Ok. Knock Knock?”

And then you say, “Who’s there?”

And then they look very confused.

Hilarity ensues.

No, I would say, “Boo.”

And you would say, “Boo Hoo”

And I would say, “Aww, don’t cry.”

/nevergetsold

I cannot believe no one has mentioned: * Whose Line is it Anyway?*

Talking about the art of taking a shit. Usually the talk is while eating a meal for some reason.

“Say good night, Gracie.”

Midgets, that’s bad isn’t it?
Tenacious D F@*k her gently
and yes to the Simpsons, Eddie Izzard and most of what’s been mentioned.

[ul]
[li]Jack Handy witticisms - no matter how bad they are I can’t help but laugh[/li][li]Nunzilla - the wind up sparking Nun[/li][li]Jackass[/li][li]The Ebonics Airline skit from SNL[/li][/ul]

Airplane, in particular, June Cleaver speaking jive.

Another vote for The Life of Brian. The scene when the centurions try to hold in their laughter in the “I have a fwiend in Wome called Biggus Dickus” part. “… He has a wife, you know …”

That commercial they had for the Comedy Network in the UK, footage of a snooker match where everyone is dead quiet, and a cell phone rings, and the guy fucks up his shot, and it cuts to another guy watching it on TV, phone in hand, laughing his arse off. … I guess you had to have been there.
Two eggs in a frying pan.

The first egg says, “Hot enough for you?”

The other egg says

“Holy shit! A talking egg!”