# GAHHH!! I love my wife with all my heart but.... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 24, 2014, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108 "2014-12-24T18:41:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108/41 "2014-12-27T15:30:17Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > It’s probably safe to assume that she doesn’t have a savings account, doesn’t have any investments and that the credit cards are all maxed out. Any money in gets immediately spent and, in this specific case, spent before it exists. That’s my point. This isn’t a one-time crisis brought on because a check came in late. It’s an ongoing problem caused by a person who cannot, or won’t, manage money responsibly. It’s a level of financial irresponsibility that would cause me to rethink my marriage. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108/42 "2014-12-28T02:30:28Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > That’s my point. This isn’t a one-time crisis brought on because a check came in late. It’s an ongoing problem caused by a person who cannot, or won’t, manage money responsibly. It’s a level of financial irresponsibility that would cause me to rethink my marriage. Seriously. Believe me, I get that we are on the same page. ---
**Author:** ![FuriousGeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecae2f/32.png) [@FuriousGeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FuriousGeorge)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2014, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108/43 "2014-12-31T16:25:10Z")
Just wanted to follow up and say thanks fopr the words. They are all received with the spirit in mind. I really was more venting and blowing off steam semi-anonymously (in a metaphorical smoky bar per **RID905** with an “Am I out of line here?” to my drinking buddies. ) Yeah, it’s an issue and yeah, it goes on to much smaller degrees wiht much smaller amounts… This was magnified by the amounts of money being spent and the attitude. So thanks for the good advice and the words and opinions and letting me vent. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2014, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108/44 "2014-12-31T17:02:04Z")
I feel for you Furiuous. ‘Learned behavior’ is right. My wife has done some similar money moves, behind my back with the intent to make it right later so I won’t notice. Of course, it all falls apart when a check doesn’t come in or something costs more than thought or I open a bill and start asking questions. She learned it from her first husband who spent every penny before it arrived. Pay a credit card with another credit card for example - I never knew it could be done until I was married. When I have to step in in bail out the problem, I just chalk it up to tuition. We both learn something and the problem gets better. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gahhh-i-love-my-wife-with-all-my-heart-but/708108.md?page=2)