# Game - Which would win in a fight? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 2, 2002, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682 "2002-09-02T16:08:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2002, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/161 "2002-10-14T05:34:16Z")
Urkel is the Uber-Nerd, and will out-spaz Screetch to the point of calling William Daniels “Kitt.” Jesus vs Buddha ---
**Author:** ![New\_Improved\_Scott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f17d59/32.png) [@New\_Improved\_Scott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/New_Improved_Scott)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2002, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/162 "2002-10-14T18:19:56Z")
Buddha, Jesus is too thin, and Buddha would get him in a bear hug and it’d be all over. **Reggie Jackson vs. Jessie Jackson** ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/163 "2002-10-23T15:08:14Z")
**Jesse:** “_Why_ …must we…” **Reggie:** Cracks him in the face with a Louisville Slugger. **Agent Dana Scully vs. Agent Clarice Starling** ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/164 "2002-10-24T01:37:14Z")
Clarice scares too easy. Scully would have her reduced to whimpers in 5 minutes. Howza bout… **Real World: Las Vegas vs. Real World: New Orleans** ---
**Author:** ![WSLer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a6a055/32.png) [@WSLer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WSLer)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/165 "2002-10-24T02:53:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Super Gnat \* > \*\*Clarice scares too easy. Scully would have her reduced to whimpers in 5 minutes. > > Howza bout… > **Real World: Las Vegas vs. Real World: New Orleans** \*\* Their collective annoyance/asshat factors are exactly the same so they would annihilate each other, much like matter/antimatter do when they meet. Starbucks Coffee vs Seattle’s Best Coffee ---
**Author:** ![zeb\_1568](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ba8739/32.png) [@zeb\_1568](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zeb_1568)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/166 "2002-10-24T03:05:40Z")
Starbucks… Too large of a chain compared to one city… Carrothead(The 1800CALLATT guy) vs Alf ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/167 "2002-10-24T03:41:29Z")
Alf. He actually had his own series about a decade ago. Besides, annoying puppets are better on the nerves than annoying humans. Kelsey (Charles Bronson in Death Wish) vs The Punisher ---
**Author:** ![WSLer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a6a055/32.png) [@WSLer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WSLer)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/168 "2002-10-24T03:53:19Z")
The Punisher 'cause he seemingly has access to every kind of weaponry short of atomics, plus he doesn’t like other vigilantes. ---
**Author:** ![Somnambulist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Somnambulist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Somnambulist)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/169 "2002-10-24T07:55:00Z")
Tag teams: Itchy & Tom vs Jerry & Scratchy ? ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2002, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/170 "2002-10-25T18:30:12Z")
Jerry and Scratchy. ALL CARTOON MICE ARE INVINCIBLE!!! Phantasm flying silver skull-drilling spheres vs Mark McGuire ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2002, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/171 "2002-10-26T14:40:21Z")
Mark McGwire – he has steroids on his side. Better living through chemistry and all that. Mr. Moose from “Captain Kangaroo” vs. Bullwinkle the Moose ---
**Author:** ![WSLer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a6a055/32.png) [@WSLer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WSLer)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2002, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/172 "2002-10-26T15:49:18Z")
Bullwinkle ‘cause he has legs and can move around while Mr. Moose wouldn’t be able to do anything except lie there and take a James Caan Godfather garbage can style beatin’!!! Anaheim Angels Rally Monkey vs Baltimore Orioles _Wild_ Bill Hagy ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/173 "2002-10-27T07:14:34Z")
Uh…ummm… Not really familiar with either of them. So… _Eenie, meenie, miney, MOE!_ Bill Hagey…juct because;) The Sopranos vs the Corleones ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/174 "2002-10-27T12:45:47Z")
duh, the Corleones – they didn’t need no stinkin’ shrinks. battle of the disgraced TV icons – **Martha Stewart vs. Rosie O’Donnell** ---
**Author:** ![Homer\_J](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c37758/32.png) [@Homer\_J](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer_J)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/175 "2002-10-27T18:44:45Z")
C3PO v R2D2 and Frodo Baggins V Harry Potter ---
**Author:** ![Minor\_Irritant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Minor\_Irritant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minor_Irritant)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2002, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/176 "2002-10-27T19:30:15Z")
Okay, cleaning up here… Rosie over Martha by KO. One good bodyslam, and Martha snaps in half like a week-old breadstick. Artoo over Threepio, by KO. Threepio is unarmed, and a spaz to boot, whereas Artoo has all sorts of dangerous little gadgets (arc welder, fire extinguisher, etc.). Potter over Baggins, by decision. Sure, Frodo’s got that sword, and a ring that makes him invisible, but every time he uses that ring, scary headless zombie guys come after him. Potter might take a while to find the little guy, but once he does, it’s all over. Next up! Battle of the Will Grahams - William Peterson (_Manhunter_) vs. Edward Norton (_Red Dragon_). ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2002, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/177 "2002-10-28T16:28:03Z")
Ed Norton is my BOY! See that action in Fight Club? He Know’s how to take a beating, and come back to give some. Gandalf vs Obi Wan Kenobi ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2002, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/178 "2002-10-30T03:49:56Z")
Okay… How about The Roadrunner vs Sonic the Hedgehog or The Borg vs the Living Dead C’mon, guys, keep this thread alive! ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2002, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/179 "2002-10-30T06:03:50Z")
I would say Roadrunner would win, as he has the uncanny ability to have incredibly bad luck befall his adversaries. If Sonic is using his ACME running shoes, he’s already lot. Ghengis Khan vs a Ford Pinto ---
**Author:** ![New\_Improved\_Scott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f17d59/32.png) [@New\_Improved\_Scott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/New_Improved_Scott)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2002, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682/180 "2002-10-30T07:12:33Z")
Khan is a pretty tough mofo, but those Pinto’s never seem to go away, and I can’t see Kahn able to resist _just one quick spin_ in the Pinto. The Borg would assimilate the living dead really easily. No contest. And as for Gandalf vs Obi Wan, I need clarification, Old Obi or Ewan Obi? My challenge: **The Predator vs. The Terminator** [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/game-which-would-win-in-a-fight/126682.md?page=10)