# Garden Gnomes **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 24, 2008, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302 "2008-11-24T18:55:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/343 "2014-10-14T11:44:58Z")
> [@Shirley\_Ujest](#): > > That is so wrong. > So very wrong. > Where can I buy one right now? I also need a Gnome Nativity. Sadly, I don’t see an outdoor version, [only this one.](http://www.amazon.com/Piece-Gnome-Nativity-Christmas-Scene/dp/B00992XLLU/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1413287054&sr=8-1-fkmr0&keywords=outdoor+gnome+nativity) ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/344 "2014-10-14T13:16:08Z")
This was our gnome experience- we stole a friend’s gnome and took him on a road trip to the Texas Old Time Fiddler’s Association contest in Groesbeck, Texas. Much fun was had by all. When we got back, I printed the pictures and returned the gnome to his yard with the evidence of his road trip. Later, I heard through the grapevine that my friend’s husband had seen me steal his gnome and was very upset about it. [[Album] Gnome Road Trip ![](https://i.imgur.com/Y8vbYey.jpeg?fb "Gnome Road Trip") ](https://imgur.com/gallery/amZel/new) ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/345 "2014-10-14T13:54:14Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > Inspiration. Buy a bunch of gnomes, repaint them as zombies. Have them all plodding towards your neighbors gnomes. [There are already zombie gnomes](http://www.zombiegnomes.com/). ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/346 "2014-10-14T14:30:42Z")
[http://www.blastr.com/2009/08/weird\_sci\_fi\_things\_you\_c.php](http://www.blastr.com/2009/08/weird_sci_fi_things_you_c.php) I suggest the Montclaire Moors zombie with one of the neighbor’s gnomes in its hand. Or the raptor skeleton, surrounded by gnomes with knives. Or the last one on the list: the gnome-be-gones. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/347 "2014-10-14T16:43:42Z")
> [@Ca3799](#): > > Later, I heard through the grapevine that my friend’s husband had seen me steal his gnome and was very upset about it. Hard to blame him; it was a dick move. Some parts of the country that’d get you shot. ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2014, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/348 "2014-10-14T17:44:57Z")
> [@Sahirrnee](#): > > Better gnomes than purple fucking flamingos. At least gnomes are cute. Flamingos are tolerable, but purple flamingos are just plain stupid. > > Next it will be little purple donkeys pulling little purple wagons filled with fake purple flowers, and little purple lawn jockeys holding purple rings. I had some neighbors in Florida who planted FAKE FLOWERS in their front yard. Bright purple, yellow, and orange bunches of fake flowers. They actually looked better after the sun faded them. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2015, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/349 "2015-05-26T11:01:38Z")
It’s that time of year again!!! ThinkGeek’s Star Trek gnomes: [http://a.tgcdn.net/images/products/additional/large/hujt\_trek\_garden\_gnomes\_grid.jpg](http://a.tgcdn.net/images/products/additional/large/hujt_trek_garden_gnomes_grid.jpg) Solar mooning gnome: (and look! It’s sold out.) [https://www.catchoftheday.com.au/product/solar-powered-mooning-gnome-ornament-181410/](https://www.catchoftheday.com.au/product/solar-powered-mooning-gnome-ornament-181410/) And although this isn’t for the garden, I still couldn’t resist sharing it: [Mooning gnome salt and pepper shakers](http://www.gadgetsandgear.com/mooning-gnome-salt-pepper.html) OK, no. This one is the absolute best one ever! [Rampaging Kaiju eating gnomes](http://a.tgcdn.net/images/products/zoom/1c81_rampaging_kaiju_garden_gnome.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2015, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/350 "2015-06-11T15:58:09Z")
The plot thickens! > **[Woman baffled after finding over 100 lawn gnomes on her front walk](https://www.aol.com/article/2015/06/09/woman-baffled-after-finding-over-100-lawn-gnomes-on-her-front-wa/21193524/?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000058)** > > A British woman took to Facebook to try and solve a mystery that developed overnight outside her home -- who left 100 garden gnomes (107 to be exact) on her front walk and why? HuffPost UK reports that Marcela Telehaničová made the ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2015, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/351 "2015-06-11T22:08:02Z")
Has anyone encountered a gnome gnomon, yet? ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2015, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/352 "2015-06-11T22:38:34Z")
> [@Frodo](#): > > The plot thickens! > > [News, Politics, Sports, Mail & Latest Headlines - AOL.com](http://www.aol.com/article/2015/06/09/woman-baffled-after-finding-over-100-lawn-gnomes-on-her-front-wa/21193524/?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000058) As **TwistofFate** said, (in 2008!) report them to Gnomeland security. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2015, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/353 "2015-06-11T23:33:55Z")
> [@tomndebb](#): > > Has anyone encountered a gnome gnomon, yet? Gnot that I Gnow ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2015, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/354 "2015-06-12T13:06:32Z")
Did anyone ever figure out what happened to **chowder**? ☹ > [@Frodo](#): > > The plot thickens! > > [News, Politics, Sports, Mail & Latest Headlines - AOL.com](http://www.aol.com/article/2015/06/09/woman-baffled-after-finding-over-100-lawn-gnomes-on-her-front-wa/21193524/?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000058) … AOL still has a website? ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2015, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/355 "2015-06-12T17:13:32Z")
> [@tomndebb](#): > > Has anyone encountered a gnome gnomon, yet? I would ask a gnostic. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2015, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/356 "2015-06-12T18:30:22Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > I would ask a gnostic. May gnats gnaw your gnu for that line… ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2015, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/357 "2015-06-18T14:46:51Z")
> [@chowder](#): > > I can see it now: > > Brave British pilot gnomes scrambling into their Spitfires and Hurricanes, soaring aloft to tackle the fiendish Gnomewaffe who are intent on bombing our island into submission. > > Oliver Cromwell and his New Model Army galloping on to Marston Moor to defeat the dastardly Gnomelists. > > Henry V exorting his few, his happy few, his band of brothers to attack the Frogognomes at Agincourt. > > Robin Hood and his Merry Men cunningly outwitting Prince JohnOGnome time and time again. > > God, it makes you proud to be British:p > > BTW. I got all you requested, your’e welcome just as long as you don’t make excessive demands on my body. > > * * * > > Under a foot tall my arse, one of the buggers stands about 36" Tis is perfect! I see a whole new genre of movies – classics reade with gnomes instead of people. _Gnomence of Arabia The Gnomefather Three Gnomes and a Baby Gnome Apollgnome 13 The Oulaw Gnosy Wales_ ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2015, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/358 "2015-06-18T14:53:08Z")
_The Ugnomables_ _Gnoghmare In Elm Street_ ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2015, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/359 "2015-06-18T14:55:52Z")
The Shawshank Gnomdeption The Gnome Mile This has to be one of the best zombie Pit threads ever! ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2015, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/360 "2015-06-18T22:42:25Z")
A while back I saw a flamingo re-painted in neon as if it were decorated for the Day of the Dead. So I went looking for a similar pic to show you guys. Instead I found [this hilarious little morsel of gore.](http://cnet2.cbsistatic.com/hub/i/r/2012/05/31/8385d1be-f0eb-11e2-8c7c-d4ae52e62bcc/thumbnail/770x578/31d104d29eae5ae04c0ec7be068e4382/gnomes9.jpg) that one guy, looking up at the camera. Dear Og, he’s sure to haunt my dreams. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2015, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/361 "2015-06-18T22:57:33Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > The Shawshank Gnomdeption > The Gnome Mile > > This has to be one of the best zombie Pit threads ever! I am ridiculously proud of _The Outlaw Gnosy Wales_! It’s the best thing I’ve writtem in months. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2015, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302/362 "2015-06-19T17:15:49Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Tis is perfect! I see a whole new genre of movies – classics reade with gnomes instead of people. > > _Gnomence of Arabia > The Gnomefather > Three Gnomes and a Baby Gnome > Apollgnome 13 > The Oulaw Gnosy Wales_ _Gnoman Holiday The Gnome of the Rose Psycho_ (about the madman Gnoman Bates, obviously) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/garden-gnomes/474302.md?page=19)