# Gatopescado's warning **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [March 8, 2017, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719 "2017-03-08T19:27:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Fruitbat2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Fruitbat2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fruitbat2)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/141 "2017-03-10T00:40:10Z")
x-ray, sorry, but I think your position is stupid and have lost interest in it. Does anyone else feel sorry for Gatopescado, though? LOL, I bet he had no idea his little comment would start all this. ---
**Author:** ![x-ray\_vision](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/x-ray_vision/32/351_2.png) [@x-ray\_vision](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/x-ray_vision)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/142 "2017-03-10T00:48:17Z")
> [@Fruitbat2](#): > > x-ray, sorry, but I think your position is stupid and have lost interest in it. My last post isn’t about my position; it’s about your inconsistency regarding _your_ position on Gato’s post. ---
**Author:** ![JackieLikesVariety](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackielikesvariety/32/296_2.png) [@JackieLikesVariety](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JackieLikesVariety)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/143 "2017-03-10T00:58:22Z")
> [@Fruitbat2](#): > > I do wonder why anyone signs up to be a forum mod. It seems quite a thankless task. Thank you, mods. this is worth repeating, I think. they do a great job in general and I appreciate it. > [@](#): > > Does anyone else feel sorry for Gatopescado, though? that also occurred to me and the answer is, maybe. I haven’t read G’s posts enough to have a feel for him and he hasn’t been in this thread, has he? I plan to give him the benefit of the doubt. ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/144 "2017-03-10T00:58:27Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Who said anyone was? You were the first person in this thread to mention banning and firing—[a mere 15 posts earlier](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=20055058&postcount=121). Pro tip: next time, wait for the thread to hit a new page before pretending you didn’t say something. **Gato** isn’t banned, and nobody suggested he should be. Nobody talked about people getting fired before you did. In any case, getting banned from a message board is hardly equivalent to losing a job. Want some more straw for that man you’re building? ---
**Author:** ![Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/4af34b/32.png) [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeke_N.Destroi)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/145 "2017-03-10T01:00:43Z")
So, let’s see, you’re confessed sock who has garnered a modding less than a full month into your new tenure here. How long until the suspension hammer falls? ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/146 "2017-03-10T01:00:56Z")
> [@Fruitbat2](#): > > Does anyone else feel sorry for Gatopescado, though? LOL, I bet he had no idea his little comment would start all this. I do. The guy may have poor taste in jokes, but he’s smart enough to stay out of this. I doubt that he wants to be the Rosa Parks of the Dope’s MRA brigade. ---
**Author:** ![Fruitbat2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Fruitbat2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fruitbat2)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/147 "2017-03-10T01:07:59Z")
> [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](#): > > So, let’s see, you’re confessed sock who has garnered a modding less than a full month into your new tenure here. > > How long until the suspension hammer falls? Oh, shut up. Really. ---
**Author:** ![Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/4af34b/32.png) [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeke_N.Destroi)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/148 "2017-03-10T01:13:46Z")
For why? Pointing out that you have broken at least two black-letter rules? ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/149 "2017-03-10T01:16:06Z")
> [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](#): > > So, let’s see, you’re confessed sock who has garnered a modding less than a full month into your new tenure here. > > How long until the suspension hammer falls? You win the thread! I’m sure a moderator will be along any moment to announce that, due to **Fruitbat2** not using her original account, **Gato** ’s warning is rescinded and crude titty jokes are now completely hunky-dory. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/150 "2017-03-10T01:19:07Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > Really? My impression is just the opposite. Not that we’re the worst, but that several awesome women have left this board in disgust at the misogyny that pervades too many threads. You are correct. I have gotten more than several PMs from women that have vented to me about the issue and then quietly left. > [@Crazyhorse](#): > > I maintain that this case was moddable for being a jerk because it was a drive by, random, “booby joke” with no substance or contribution to the thread but that if the very same poster, under the very same circumstances, instead asked “Did you get a boob job or what?” that should not be modded as being a jerk in the context of that particular thread. But I get the feeling it might be modded as a violation of the boobygate rule regardless and to me that completely bypasses the actual spirit of the rule and simply reverts to black and white automatic warning based on keywords found in a post. I’m not sure how to have a productive discussion about what your feelings about what might have happened but didn’t are. I mean…maybe? “Did you get a boob job or what?” is still pretty jerkish. “I wonder what kind of changes you’re talking about, because my answer would be different if you got major surgery like a boob job, than if you got a haircut,” would almost certainly pass muster. Even whilst using the word boob, it displays thoughtfulness and a reason for the topic to be brought up. More, it furthers the conversation that’s already happening. “Boob” is not a banned word. There are other banned words (which I think is stupid), but boob isn’t one of them. ---
**Author:** ![Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/4af34b/32.png) [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeke_N.Destroi)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/151 "2017-03-10T01:25:33Z")
> [@erysichthon](#): > > You win the thread! > > I’m sure a moderator will be along any moment to announce that, due to **Fruitbat2** not using her original account, **Gato** ’s warning is rescinded and crude titty jokes are now completely hunky-dory. Sorry man, when did I say anything about the warning? **Fruitbat2** Has been around for less than a month, she’s already drawn a note and she copped to being a sock. I said nothing about titties or anything else. I said she broke two black letter rules - one she’s been modded for. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/152 "2017-03-10T01:27:33Z")
> [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](#): > > So, let’s see, you’re confessed sock who has garnered a modding less than a full month into your new tenure here. > > How long until the suspension hammer falls? Gimme a break!:rolleyes: She only started a new name because she couldn’t remember the old one. It’s not like she’s socking for the purpose of trolling. Jeez! ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/153 "2017-03-10T01:30:25Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Gimme a break!:rolleyes: > > She only started a new name because she couldn’t remember the old one. It’s not like she’s socking for the purpose of trolling. Jeez! Why? People are warned for things discussed in a locked, buried, and unknown to many thread. Why should clear and visible rules be less important than secret rules? ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/154 "2017-03-10T01:33:37Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Justify your comment. Making a forum for women is somehow endorsing bullying. Makes no sense. If someone said, “let’s make a bullying forum” that would make sense. Well, we have the Pit. You implied that if women wanted to avoid humiliating references to their bodies that they should go hide in spaces walled off from men. That’s implying that women should expect that kind of bullying in the wider world. But, no, it’s not that women are asking to be protected from the wider world. They’re making a very reasonable request to be treated with respect and dignity in society, as they would be face-to-face. Or is that not what your snide references to “trigger warnings” and women-only threads was getting at? If not, then you’re the one who needs to explain what you meant. > [@x-ray\_vision](#): > > It didn’t seem to be about a body issue or a serious psychological issue regarding feelings of attractiveness. The title of the thread is _“Why does feeling attractive feel creepy?”_ and what follows is regarding something the OP mused over. That “something about it didn’t sit well” with her and she was “just wondering if anyone else has thoughts on this” and is asking why “the feeling of being attractive isn’t 100% warm fuzzy feelings.” It seems she has almost 100% fuzzy feelings, and is just wondering what’s missing. I think that matters in deciding if others might think the boob joke you’re thinking about posting will go over well. It obviously didn’t, but that’s not the point. I have a hard time parsing this muddle of reasoning. Regardless of what you think the substantive question or debate that the OP was asking, none of it was inviting us to speculate openly about her secondary sexual characteristics. > [@](#): > > I don’t think Gato was making a joke regardless if it was insensitive or not; I think he just didn’t think it was. > > I don’t think most posters that would make a joke post regarding that sort of OP would have done so if the thread was more obviously about a serious body or psychological issue. Calling it a joke gone wrong is the most generous thing you can say about it. Anything else is much worse. > [@](#): > > No one is saying that, and I don’t think you think Gato’s post rises to that level, do you? I was specifically responding to Levdrakon’s offensive remarks about creating women-only forums or posting trigger warnings. That’s exactly what those kinds of things imply—that any woman who complains about such treatment is too weak to go out into mainstream society. > [@](#): > > The thing that makes the difference more innocent in this case is that Gato and the rest of us have no idea what the OP looks like. Betting on a boob job when we’re right in front of someone and see what her figure looks like raises the inappropriateness level. Shall I give you a clue? It’s demeaning when you do it to someone on these boards, regardless of whether you know what he or she really looks like. We’re actual people here. Treat us like that. ---
**Author:** ![Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/4af34b/32.png) [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeke_N.Destroi)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/155 "2017-03-10T01:36:34Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Gimme a break!:rolleyes: > > She only started a new name because she couldn’t remember the old one. It’s not like she’s socking for the purpose of trolling. Jeez! Like I asked earlier, “Isn’t that what any banned poster would say?” ---
**Author:** ![Crazyhorse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crazyhorse/32/31_2.png) [@Crazyhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crazyhorse)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/156 "2017-03-10T01:42:31Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > I’m not sure how to have a productive discussion about what your feelings about what might have happened but didn’t are. I mean…maybe? “Did you get a boob job or what?” is still pretty jerkish. “I wonder what kind of changes you’re talking about, because my answer would be different if you got major surgery like a boob job, than if you got a haircut,” would almost certainly pass muster. Even whilst using the word boob, it displays thoughtfulness and a reason for the topic to be brought up. More, it furthers the conversation that’s already happening. > > “Boob” is not a banned word. There are other banned words (which I think is stupid), but boob isn’t one of them. I’m glad we agree in general then. The word being forbidden wasn’t my concern though. It was that using the word in a thread about something even peripherally, possibly construed as a women’s thread about body issues also isn’t forbidden per se. It’s all about the intent, context, etc. Otherwise the mods could just have a program scan every such thread for key words and issue warnings and bans for them while they sip margaritas and surf youtube. (Don’t get any ideas mods!) So my hypothetical was intended to illustrate exactly a case where some might think it was still inappropriate but the mods probably should consider the context and intent carefully before responding. ITD confirmed that she would consider context and intent in such edge cases and that’s all I was trying to find out. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/157 "2017-03-10T01:48:36Z")
For future reference, if a bunch of people point out that a comment you made is considered insultingly personal and offensive by many, your options are: 1/ Say, “Wow, sorry, I didn’t realise, I’ll watch out for that” 2/ Say, “Yeah, I was trying for a joke but it was pretty dumb, sorry” 3/ Argue for four pages, “That’s stupid and it wasn’t offensive and anyway I can say what I like here” Two of these responses are considered mature and responsible and will garner approving nods from pretty much all concerned; the third will leave most people wondering just why you’re so invested in insulting the annoyed group. ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/158 "2017-03-10T01:53:19Z")
> [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](#): > > Sorry man, when did I say anything about the warning? > > **Fruitbat2** Has been around for less than a month, she’s already drawn a note and she copped to being a sock. > > I said nothing about titties or anything else. > > I said she broke two black letter rules - one she’s been modded for. Why are you and **levdakon** going on about this? The mods are well aware of this, and are presumably deciding how to handle it. Yet you continue with this ominous talk of suspensions and “black-letter rules.” It sounds to me like you’ve decided that, if you can’t win the argument, you’ll settle for a scalp. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/159 "2017-03-10T02:31:31Z")
> [@erysichthon](#): > > **Gato** isn’t banned, \ I’m speaking very slowly. Warnings can lead to bannings. They are a bit more than simply “asking someone to stop.” It’s only in people’s active imaginations I ever claimed anyone was banned. /speaking slowly. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2017, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719/160 "2017-03-10T02:34:43Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Well, that’s the problem. Getting someone banned doesn’t bother you, and IRL, getting someone fired doesn’t bother you. Women and men seem to have different perspectives on what penalty fits the crime. Yet, no one has been banned. No one has been fired. You have (apparently) decided that this is imminent, and that women don’t care when it happens. Warnings \*can \*lead to bannings, if the behavior _continues_. I imagine that there are a lot of posters on these boards who have gotten one or two warnings, yet continue to post. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gatopescados-warning/781719.md?page=9)