# Gaudere's Law my ptootie! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 21, 2001, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305 "2001-08-21T05:29:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2001, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/61 "2001-09-06T01:43:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pesch \* > > **Pesch’s Law** > > The degree of TMI revealed in a post is in equal proportion to the chance a close relative, friend, or **cow-orker** will read it. \*\* Whenever someone makes an innocent spelling mistake, some lunatic will come in and reply solely to the mistake. “You like to ork cows?” ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2001, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/62 "2001-09-06T02:15:48Z")
**Jeremytt:** And she’s damned cute, too. 😉 **ExTank’s Axiom:** Gun Control Debates are generally useless. **Corollary1:** the more vehement the author’s post, the more likely it is that they know little, if anything, of value on the subject. **Corollary2:** the lack of knowledge on the subject will _not_ preclude any given nit from discoursing at length on the subject. (Note to self: Careful where you’re putting that there foot.) **Corollary3:** In spite of dozens, perhaps hundreds, of previous Gun Control Debates, there will always be a willing jackass who will post a new one without doing a forum search for previous threads on the subject. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2001, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/63 "2001-09-06T02:18:30Z")
As your knowledge about the thread subject being discussed increases the likelyhood of you needing to apologise for something increases proportionately. Primarily due to a. Coming off as a superior know-it-all b. Assuming that because of your vast knowledge you can assume the contents of each post without actually reading it. c. Knowing that as an expert you don’t need to look verify anything before spouting complex things. ---
**Author:** ![Tenebras](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/977dab/32.png) [@Tenebras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenebras)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2001, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/64 "2001-12-04T02:04:16Z")
Tenebras’ Law: Any poster who admits to playing video games and/or watching Star Trek while at the same time having a significant other, will be attacked within 5 subsequent posts, sometimes [immediately](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=102346)… Tenebras ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/65 "2002-04-24T12:33:13Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Purd_ > Corollary - Beer by many posters at once in the same location will transmute the above result into wacky hijinks. We generally call those **dopefests** 😉 "Strainger’s Law: The more creative and witty you think your OP is, the fewer responses it will receive." At last, the secret! Post drek! ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/66 "2002-04-24T13:34:28Z")
Auntie Em’s Law: The second you post a narrative about your best friend’s masturbating husband (figuring she’ll never know, because she hasn’t even been on the board in like, three months, so she’s probably never coming back, right?), said friend will return to the board and immediately choose _that post_, out of the teeming millions of other more interesting posts, to read. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/67 "2002-04-24T14:43:10Z")
Gaudere’s Law pertains specifically to spelling errors, so I coined… **Chef Troy’s Corollary** to **Gaudere’s Law** Which states: _Any post mocking the grammar and usage of another poster will inevitably contain a grammar and/or usage error of its own._ Only professional editors like me are even partially exempt from this, and only when we take the time to edit our own work _very_ carefully. Want to see a hilarious example of **Chef Troy’s Corollary** in action? Check out [this exchange](http://www.teemings.com/issue09/letters.html) in “Letters to the Editor” from issue 9 of [Teemings](http://www.teemings.com). (Euty charitably refrained from pointing it out, but apparently the letter-writer _misspelled his own name_ when signing his post. 'Cause, you know, there’s no WAY a moderator would make such a mistake unless he was trying to annoy the letter-writer.) ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305/68 "2002-04-24T16:16:11Z")
**CalMeacham’s Third Law: All good sets of law come in threes.** Think about it – Newton’s Laws of Motion, the Laws of Thermodynamics, Asimov’s Rules of Robotics. I haven’t thought of the other two yet. Or maybe this isn’t a “good set”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gauderes-law-my-ptootie/77305.md?page=3)