# Gawddamn Rules **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 18, 2011, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088 "2011-01-18T17:43:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/1 "2011-01-18T17:43:30Z")
Fuck shit fucking bastard shithead colon maggoted fecaphiles Damned fucking buggered fucking felching fuckity fuck fucked bastards > [@](#): > > Password Rules: > > 1. Minimum password length is eight characters. > 2. Passwords must contain at least one of each of the following: one alphabetic uppercase, one alphabetic lowercase, one numeric, and one special character. > 3. Passwords shall not contain any two identical consecutive characters (example: 22apples, 14588904). > 4. Passwords may contain no more than two identical consecutive characters in any position from the previous password. > 5. Passwords shall not contain any dictionary word. > 6. Passwords shall not contain any proper noun or the name of any person, pet, child, or fictional character. > 7. Passwords shall not contain any employee serial number, Social Security number, birth date, phone number, or any information that could be readily guessed about the creator of the password. > 8. Passwords shall not contain any simple pattern of letters or numbers, such as “qwerty” or “xyz123”. > 9. Passwords shall not be any word, noun, or name spelled backwards or appended with a single digit or with a two-digit “year” string, such as 98xyz123. > 10. Pass phrases, if used in addition to or instead of passwords, should follow these same guidelines. > 11. Passwords shall not be the same as the User ID. > 12. Password length will be selected to provide a level of protection commensurate to the value or sensitivity of the resources or data it protects, but not less than eight characters. ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/2 "2011-01-18T17:47:39Z")
And that’s just to read on [Comics.com](http://Comics.com)! ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/3 "2011-01-18T17:52:40Z")
Somebody’s having a bad case of the Mondays. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/4 "2011-01-18T18:05:06Z")
You’re lucky! We’re required to store all of our passwords in a [charger](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Papillon_%28book%29) ---
**Author:** ![Palooka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/palooka/32/2902_2.png) [@Palooka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palooka)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/5 "2011-01-18T18:06:29Z")
These 12 password requirements are ridiculous! I just want to log on. T12prar!Ijwtlo Not so hard. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/6 "2011-01-18T18:13:04Z")
1. Passwords shall not be written down. 2. Passwords shall be changed every 24 hours. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/7 "2011-01-18T18:14:13Z")
What does this have to do with rape? ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/8 "2011-01-18T18:24:07Z")
> [@bup](#): > > What does this have to do with rape? You now need a password to access her honeypot. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/9 "2011-01-18T18:32:21Z")
> [@Palooka](#): > > These 12 password requirements are ridiculous! I just want to log on. > > T12prar!Ijwtlo > > Not so hard. I always prefer IT=teh5uXX0rs ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/10 "2011-01-18T18:42:18Z")
> [@saoirse](#): > > I always prefer IT=teh5uXX0rs I’m sorry you’ve failed rule 3 ☹ ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/11 "2011-01-18T18:48:33Z")
> [@saoirse](#): > > I always prefer IT=teh5uXX0rs Your suggestion falls afoul of Rule #3 - no identical consecutive characters. 😉 Being a lazy bastard, I attempted to create a password without reading the rules. My first attempt failed rule #3, my second failed rule #6. The one I couldn’t figure out without reading the rules was rule #5, not because the password intentionally contains a word, but because it contains a portion of someone’s name (an author’s, not mine) with the letters ‘man.’ > [@Projammer](#): > > 1. Passwords shall be changed every 24 hours. Almost right: > [@](#): > > For security, all passwords are set to expire every 60 days Fuck. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/12 "2011-01-18T18:49:45Z")
> [@wevets](#): > > Fuck shit fucking bastard shithead colon maggoted fecaphiles > > [password rules] How do you like working for the NSA? ---
**Author:** ![Daylate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9dc877/32.png) [@Daylate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daylate)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/13 "2011-01-18T19:56:47Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally Posted by wevets > Fuck shit fucking bastard shithead colon maggoted fecaphiles Very lame. You need to work in something like; “Cocksucking siphylated afterbirth of a Chinese gangfuck” ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/14 "2011-01-18T20:14:53Z")
He’s not allowed to use the names of staff. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/15 "2011-01-18T20:30:03Z")
Jan2011# Feb2011# Would appear to squeak by under the rules. ---
**Author:** ![Lare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/53a042/32.png) [@Lare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lare)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/16 "2011-01-18T20:32:36Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Jan20 **11** # > Feb20 **11** # > > Would appear to squeak by under the rules. How does that not violate rule 3? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/17 "2011-01-18T20:32:48Z")
Those consecutive 1’s are a problem. Try: Jan2010+1# Feb2010+1# ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/18 "2011-01-18T20:37:09Z")
Fec4ph!les ---
**Author:** ![Hero\_From\_Sector\_7G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@Hero\_From\_Sector\_7G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hero_From_Sector_7G)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/19 "2011-01-18T20:42:02Z")
Your easy to remember password: awefxQ@#RS Here’s how: pick a hand gesture and repeat it. For example, lay your hand on the keyboard as follows: Pinky: a Ring: w Middle: e Index: f Thumb: x now make a clockwise pressing starting with the pinky. move the hand up one key (pinky now on q) and hold shift while making your gesture. This method is simple, easy to remember, and easy to change. Just move the starting position of your hand around the keyboard. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2011, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088/20 "2011-01-18T20:46:54Z")
> [@Palooka](#): > > T12pr **a** r!Ijwtlo > > Not so hard. 1. Passwords shall not contain any dictionary word. > [@](#): > > **a**   > –indefinite article > > 1. not any particular or certain one of a class or group: a man; a chemical; a house. > 2. a certain; a particular: one at a time; two of a kind; A Miss Johnson called. > 3. another; one typically resembling: a Cicero in eloquence; a Jonah. > 4. one (used before plural nouns that are preceded by a quantifier singular in form): a hundred men (compare hundreds of men ); a dozen times (compare dozens of times ). > 5. indefinitely or nonspecifically (used with adjectives expressing number): a great many years; a few stars. > 6. one (used before a noun expressing quantity): a yard of ribbon; a score of times. > 7. any; a single: not a one. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gawddamn-rules/568088.md?page=2)