# "Gay as a \" similes **URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297 **Category:** In My Humble Opinion **Created:** [September 14, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297 "2011-09-14T15:48:16Z") **Posts on this page:** 20 **Page:** 1
### Author: ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/1 "2011-09-14T15:48:16Z")
Anyone else find these similes friggin’ hilarious? My favorite ones that I’ve heard from the SDMB: Gay as a box of birds Gay as a tap dancing hyena (my current favorite) I’ve also heard Gay as a goose (the first one I can recall hearing, from an episode of ‘Cheers’) Gay as a french horn Gayer than cum on a mustache (some comedian, can’t recall who) Gayer than eight guys blowing nine guys (comedian Patton Oswalt) Gay as a chaise lounge ---
### Author: ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/2 "2011-09-14T16:09:52Z")
as gay as Christmas Seinfeld - “so gay he buys Brawny paper towels for the packaging” ---
### Author: ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/3 "2011-09-14T16:10:51Z")
_Good Omens_ used “gay as a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide.” ---
### Author: ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/4 "2011-09-14T16:13:43Z")
I’ve heard “gay as a Mexican hat band.” ---
### Author: ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/5 "2011-09-14T16:14:27Z")
I used to say “gayer than the Pride parade they throw in West Hollywood every year.” A little long, and plus I think I need to update my reference now that I’m not in Los Angeles anymore, but twas my go-to nonetheless. ---
### Author: ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/6 "2011-09-14T16:16:16Z")
Queer as a football bat. ---
### Author: ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/7 "2011-09-14T16:20:07Z")
Gay as a mayor Gay as a playwright Gay as a head of state Gay as a Nobel Prize winner Gay as a king Gay as a painter Gay as a mother Gay as a father Gay as a brother Gay as a sister ---
### Author: ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/8 "2011-09-14T16:25:17Z")
Gayer than Tom Cruise rollerblading in cut-offs. ---
### Author: ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/9 "2011-09-14T16:29:50Z")
I like the one Freddie Mercury used to describe himself - gay as a daffodil. ---
### Author: ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/10 "2011-09-14T17:37:56Z")
As camp as a row of pink tents. ---
### Author: ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/11 "2011-09-14T17:56:28Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > I’ve heard “gay as a Mexican hat band.” I’ve heard “as old dad’s hatband”. Or “as a tangerine”. ---
### Author: ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/12 "2011-09-14T17:59:07Z")
Gayer than a Judy Garland singalong. ---
### Author: ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/13 "2011-09-14T18:06:30Z")
[Gay as Julius Caesar.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julius_Caesar) ---
### Author: ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/14 "2011-09-14T18:09:22Z")
There was one from an episode of Weeds a couple seasons back that I can’t recall exactly, but it was something like: …gay as a purse full of glitter and rainbows (or maybe unicorns, although I’m sure any combination of the three would work). ---
### Author: ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/15 "2011-09-14T18:22:13Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Gay as a mayor > Gay as a playwright > Gay as a head of state > Gay as a Nobel Prize winner > Gay as a king > Gay as a painter > Gay as a mother > Gay as a father > Gay as a brother > Gay as a sister Ha! Harharhar! HARHARHARHARRRR!!! But, yeah, I’m going to go with my fave as “gay as a french horn”. ---
### Author: ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/16 "2011-09-14T18:27:31Z")
“… as a maypole.” ---
### Author: ![Toucanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3bc359/32.png) [@Toucanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toucanna) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/17 "2011-09-14T18:33:02Z")
Back in the '70s I heard, “As gay as the first day of May.” Due to all the pole dancing, flowers and fluttery ribbons was my guess. ::shrug smilie:: ---
### Author: ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/18 "2011-09-14T18:52:00Z")
Gay as a man who routinely engages in romantic and sexual relationships with one or more other men! ---
### Author: ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/19 "2011-09-14T19:11:07Z")
> [@hogarth](#): > > I’ve heard “as old dad’s hatband”. Or “as a tangerine”. “Gay as a tangerine” has always been a personal favorite. I originally heard it from David Letterman. ---
### Author: ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady) #### Post date: [September 14, 2011, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297/20 "2011-09-14T19:18:16Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > Ha! Harharhar! HARHARHARHARRRR!!! > > But, yeah, I’m going to go with my fave as “gay as a french horn”. Now you settle down, missy. Gay as a playwright was pretty good. > [@drewtwo99](#): > > Gay as a man who routinely engages in romantic and sexual relationships with one or more other men! Hey, play along. :mad: > [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > “Gay as a tangerine” has always been a personal favorite. I originally heard it from David Letterman. I will echo this love of “gay as a tangerine.” Classic. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-as-a-blank-similes/596297.md?page=2)