# Gay Marriage = Infedility and Polygamy? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [August 15, 2013, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343 "2013-08-15T19:59:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2013, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/41 "2013-08-19T21:07:09Z")
> [@Learjeff](#): > > Gay marriage like polygamy in that both are marriages that aren’t based on the mores and traditions of Christian/European society of the last millenium or so. Right, it’s not like the Mormons practiced polygamy or anything. Oh, wait… So, why did we outlaw polygamy? I know my own ancestors left Utah to stop getting pressured into taking on a second wife, but it was still legal then and it was just a personal choice. Why was it outlawed? What’s changed that would make it a better idea now? ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2013, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/42 "2013-08-19T22:00:55Z")
**Ethilrist** : there are more social and legal protections in place now than in Brigham Young’s day. In those days, women had very limited legal protections against being married without their consent. Marriages (both single and multiple) were largely compulsory. Our legal system – and our society – is not yet perfect. I’m sure that some people are still under huge duress to get married, even when it isn’t what they really want. But the major failings of the system have been corrected today. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2013, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/43 "2013-08-19T22:07:44Z")
Not that banning the practice among Mormons was really about protecting women. It was more a matter of cultural prejudice against the practice in most other demographics, and clearing the consequent difficulty in Utah becoming a state. ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2013, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/44 "2013-08-19T22:40:58Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > So, why did we outlaw polygamy? If rich old men marry all the attractive young women, you end up with a surplus of teenage boys. So you send those out to colonize. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/45 "2013-08-20T00:56:25Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Okay, that’s not just stupid, that’s got to be some kind of mental disability. The problem being that they can’t look each other in the eye during sex. _“She added that blind people are also in that category,”_ says the link. So she – wait. That means – huh? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/46 "2013-08-20T01:19:45Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > The problem being that they can’t look each other in the eye during sex. And this lady probably comes from a cultural milieu where you never do it with the lights on anyway. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/47 "2013-08-20T01:21:16Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > The problem being that they can’t look each other in the eye during sex. _“She added that blind people are also in that category,”_ says the link. > > So she – wait. That means – huh? It means love is blind. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/48 "2013-08-20T01:33:38Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > It means love is blind. So is justice, and we know how that turned out in _Alice’s Restaurant._ wanders off… ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/49 "2013-08-20T02:11:29Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > That is, IF 20 years from now, polygamy is legalized and adultery becomes widely accepted, will you STILL think she’s an idiot? Will you be aghast at how wrong you were? Or will you shrug, “What’s wrong with polygamy? And what’s so great about pure monogamy, anyway?” I already shrug that, though. I don’t think same-sex marriage will lead to acceptance of polyamory, though I do think that the same shift in attitudes about sex and relationships that is helping same-sex marriage along will sooner or later do the same for polyamory. But either way, I don’t see that as an argument against same-sex marriage. Moreover, as **DrFidelius** pointed out here and countless other posters on previous threads, poly marriage differs from dyadic marriage in a way that’s not wholly parallel to the differences between same-sex and different-sex marriage. (And yeah, Dan Savage isn’t in favor of compulsory or default monogamy, but he only grudgingly accepts infidelity in an extremely circumscribed set of circumstances.) ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2013, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343/50 "2013-08-20T02:31:07Z")
> [@aNewLeaf](#): > > If rich old men marry all the attractive young women, you end up with a surplus of teenage boys. > So you send those out to colonize. Well, no – you simply throw the teenage boys out – destitute, uneducated, unprepared for any life outside that cult. It really happens. Look up ‘fundamentalist Mormon lost boys’. Here’s [one story](http://www.theguardian.com/world/2005/jun/14/usa.julianborger). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-marriage-infedility-and-polygamy/666343.md?page=2)