# Gay pride parades.. more helpful or harmful to the gay rights movement? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 4, 2012, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175 "2012-07-04T02:52:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![gatorslap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gatorslap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gatorslap)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/41 "2012-07-05T05:26:19Z")
Pride definitely has a lot of stereotypical appearances/behavior on display and plenty of outlandishness. But that’s a feature, not a bug. Pride gives us a “day off” from heteronormative society. It allows us to “let our hair down”, so to speak, and just go nuts and have a good time. Plus, if we don’t accept the flamers, the ultra-butch, the drag queens, etc., what grounds do we have to demand acceptance from society at large? I definitely don’t think we’re going to advance civil rights by throwing fellow queer people under the bus. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/42 "2012-07-05T07:38:12Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > You have a 15 year old baton twirler wearing a leotard, that doesn’t mean the next group can have a 50 year old man dressed as a French Maid, or a 50 year old woman dressed as a dominatrix because we’ve sexualized the event. > > Parades aren’t events to “be yourself”. The baton twirler isn’t being herself, she’s putting on a structured performance as a member of her school’s marching band. I’m not sure what the guys wearing nothing but a speedo, or the guy in the fairy costume, or the cross dressing guy with the pink feather boa are doing, besides reinforcing a unfair stereotype of gay men as hypersexualized weirdos. > > Of course, it does depend on the purpose of the parade. If it’s to show yourselves and promote a better relationship with the straight majority, it should be toned down. If it’s to be a no holds barred F/U to the assholes who’ll hate you anyway, bring it on! I hate to break it to you, but actually? The parades aren’t about straight people. At all. They’re about gay people. The name’s a bit of a giveaway. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/43 "2012-07-05T07:43:08Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > I have no opinion. I just find it weird that people wish to define themselves by whom or what the like to sleep with. I can understand that others might find my opinion weird. Practically speaking, the most important aspect of a person’s identity is the one other people want to kill you for. If there were no homophobia, there’d be no gay pride. If other people didn’t insist on making our sexuality such a big deal, our sexuality wouldn’t be a big deal. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/44 "2012-07-05T09:48:15Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I hate to break it to you, but actually? The parades aren’t about straight people. At all. They’re about gay people. The name’s a bit of a giveaway. The OP asked about the gay rights movement. Do you think that has nothing to do with straight people? ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/45 "2012-07-05T10:25:27Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > People don’t lose their friends and families and jobs because they are left-handed . . . but because they come out as - or are discovered to be - gay. Or even thought to be, with no actual proof; just some asshole (with my apologies to exit sphincters) who decided that specific subordinate/ candidate/ student was gay and got them fired/ hired someone else who didn’t ping their gaydar/ flunked them, etc. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/46 "2012-07-05T13:01:10Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > I must thank you, **panache45** , for your remarks. They put a whole 'nother light on my gay golfing friend’s POV. > > May I pass them along to my gay golfing friend? Not that they are likely to change his mind–but they are interesting, and he might like to hear a clear and articulate explanation of “the other side,” as it were. I’d be interested in his feedback. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/47 "2012-07-05T13:29:18Z")
Shocking how many of the board conservatives are in the “harmful” category. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/48 "2012-07-05T13:36:12Z")
Helpful, up to a point. When I drive through DC and see a big parade or protest, of any kind, it makes me aware that a lot of people have an interest in that subject. It isn’t just a few people doing things I might find icky in back rooms. That is a first step toward learning to accept other people or learning to accept certain things about yourself. A gay pride parade makes me aware that there are a lot of gay folks out there. It makes me ask questions about what you want and who you are. Those are good things. It also once made my kids ask why those two men were kissing and why that other man didn’t have any pants. Not subjects I wanted to discuss while driving through the nightmare of DC during an event but I can see why gay people want those questions out there. I think of Ren Fairs in the same way. I’m nerdy and I wouldn’t mind dressing up in fun costumes, talking in a bad accent and pretending for a while. A Ren Fair would allow me to do that if I wanted. In the end, such events make me aware that there are a lot of people out there that have similar interests and even if I am not interested myself, I can at least see they aren’t crazy people. Just a little different. When events become huge parties they are bound to alienate the non-partiers, like me. The wilder partiers can easily become the image people remember. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/49 "2012-07-05T13:54:11Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > But I went to the 2011 Cleveland parade and it was 90% churches advertising their acceptance, and, like…Frito Lay. Nabisco posted [a rainbow Oreo on their Facebook page](http://news.yahoo.com/oreo-pride-rainbow-stuffed-cookie-sparks-boycott-183735874--abc-news-politics.html;_ylt=A2KJ3CQImvVPZiwAObHQtDMD) in support of gay pride, so the tide is turning in corporate America, though some conservative heads are still exploding: > [@](#): > > Over the past 17 hours more than 157,000 people have “liked” the image, 40,000 people have shared it and 20,000 have commented on it. > > But while many of the comments were supportive, some Facebook users pledged to boycott the cookie because of the post. > > “I’ll never buy Oreo again,” one commenter wrote. > > “Disgusted with oreos,” wrote another. “Being gay is an abmonitation in GOd’s eyes i wont be buying them anymore.” ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/50 "2012-07-05T14:14:40Z")
> [@Odesio](#): > > I used to think it was harmful to the gay rights movement. After all, shows like the _700 Club_ used some of the more outrageous images from pride events in their efforts to show just how Godless and immoral those homosexuals were. I’m convinced that those images aren’t really all that helpful to the gay rights movement. It’s not like _The 700 Club_ was exactly gay-friendly to begin with, though. If someone has an agenda that requires them to depict homosexuals as godless and immoral then they’ll find a way to do it, pride parades or no. > [@](#): > > However, I think gay pride parades have been helpful to the gay rights movement. I’ve never been to a pride parade, but from what I’ve seen you’ve got all sorts of different people from the LGBT community who are participating as one big group. It doesn’t matter if you’re a girlie lesbian, a bear, a troll or a drag queen because they’re all welcome. I think that kind of unity is pretty beneficial and outweighs any negativity that images from the parade might have on the nation as a whole. Yeah, I agree and think it would be a lot more harmful to have gay pride events where everyone pretended that drag queens, etc., didn’t even exist. While I think it’s best for all involved if participants in pride parades – and other parades – refrain from violating local laws regarding public nudity, etc., if everyone but the “middle-class suburbanites” were forced to hide then the event wouldn’t be about \*pride \*at all. It wouldn’t even be much of a parade. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/51 "2012-07-05T22:10:03Z")
I just don’t know why gay pride parades have to be so sexually charged. I’ve read everything from public sex, to people walking around butt naked around children from some parades and police ignoring it. Why go that far ? What possible good for the cause can come from that ? Don’t get me wrong I see absolutely nothing wrong with homosexuality but if equality is the goal they should be arrested just like the rest of us if we pulled the same stunt. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2012, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/52 "2012-07-05T23:59:38Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I hate to break it to you, but actually? The parades aren’t about straight people. At all. They’re about gay people. The name’s a bit of a giveaway. I’ve heard of gay-supporters participating, though. After Brent Sopel won the Stanley Cup with the Chicago Blackhawks, he road a float in the parade with the Cup. And I don’t believe he’s gay, at least not that I know of. And I don’t think the Stanley Cup is gay. 😉 He did so to honor Brendan Burke, the late son of Brian Burke, the Maple Leafs’ GM. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/53 "2012-07-06T04:31:53Z")
> [@Ibanez](#): > > . . . I’ve read . . . I have never seen any illegal behavior in a Pride parade. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/54 "2012-07-06T07:07:17Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![gatorslap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gatorslap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gatorslap)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/55 "2012-07-06T16:46:10Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > I have never seen any illegal behavior in a Pride parade. Public nudity is legal in San Francisco. I do see some nudity at SF Pride, but not much. And not in the actual parade. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/56 "2012-07-06T17:28:04Z")
[QUOTE=Odesio] After all, shows like the 700 Club used some of the more outrageous images from pride events in their efforts to show just how Godless and immoral those homosexuals were. [/QUOTE] I actually saw that piece on _The 700 Club_ years back. I practically wet myself - it was one of the funniest things I ever saw on TV. So Pride events are good for that, at least. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/57 "2012-07-06T19:32:06Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > If “played flute in a gay pride parade” isn’t a euphamism for something, it should be. OK, come on, I have to ask - is this supposed to be a joke? Perhaps because gay people have more sex than other people do? Or what? Be careful, or I’ll call a moderator on you… ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/58 "2012-07-06T20:17:33Z")
Probably more of that urban slang I can never figure out. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/59 "2012-07-06T20:38:45Z")
It’s impossible to answer as there are all sorts of pride parades. There’s pride parades where at least somewhat well-dressed and at least somewhat well-behaved people march with banners and signs and push a message of mutual acceptance, tolerance, and respect under the law and within Society out in the open. Then on the other end there are parades with hairy, nearly-naked 300-pound men dry-humping each other like sex-starved orangutans - and screaming women boob flashing the crowd and carrying giant 6-foot inflatable double-ended dildos. (Yes, I’ve witnessed this.) Obviously, I feel one is helpful and one is harmful. As a card-carrying LGBT member, the latter makes me unhappy. If the goal is to “let your hair down” then go for it. But don’t ever delude yourself that you’re creating goodwill among the vast herds of American whitebread rabble who given a chance and the right religious leader wouldn’t willingly vote to set up LGBT internment and re-education camps. ---
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175/60 "2012-07-06T21:16:44Z")
> [@Una\_Persson](#): > > Then on the other end there are parades with hairy, nearly-naked 300-pound men dry-humping each other like sex-starved orangutans - and screaming women boob flashing the crowd and carrying giant 6-foot inflatable double-ended dildos. (Yes, I’ve witnessed this.) > > Obviously, I feel one is helpful and one is harmful. As a card-carrying LGBT member, the latter makes me unhappy. > > If the goal is to “let your hair down” then go for it. But don’t ever delude yourself that you’re creating goodwill among the vast herds of American whitebread rabble who given a chance and the right religious leader wouldn’t willingly vote to set up LGBT internment and re-education camps. I honestly don’t understand how some people don’t get this. The faux article in _The Onion_ has more than a little bit of many people’s actual attitudes on the subject. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-pride-parades-more-helpful-or-harmful-to-the-gay-rights-movement/627175.md?page=4)