# Gay vs straight people--willingness to date a transsexual person? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187 "2010-04-24T07:25:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/1 "2010-04-24T07:25:29Z")
Okay, here’s the setup: simply put, would you be willing to enter a romantic relationship with a transsexual person? The person is completely post-op, the [surgeons](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_zABxJjGIDkU/Sw9KNYN7vaI/AAAAAAAAA4c/sYXZwEGR0vY/s1600/mad_scientist.gif) did a very good job, and they’re otherwise your “type.” They just happened to have been _born_ the wrong gender for your sexual orientation. Now, assuming that poll feature works…who’d be cool with it, who answers with a solid “maybe/I don’t know,” and who couldn’t even consider such a relationship? Broken down by sexual orientation. Bisexuals, after some deliberation, I’m giving you your own category. You can thank me at your local polling place in November. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/2 "2010-04-24T07:31:36Z")
Forgot to add…feel free to add your own if/but qualifiers or what-have-you in the thread, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Not\_a\_Platypus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/3 "2010-04-24T07:44:39Z")
I’m bisexual and wouldn’t have a problem. Pre-op might make me pause, but only because sometimes I’m more attracted to one gender over another, and someone that physically is one and mentally the other wouldn’t necessarily fit what I’m feeling at the time. Long term that wouldn’t matter so much, but it would be something to consider. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/4 "2010-04-24T07:51:02Z")
It probably wouldn’t matter to me, but I put “maybe” just because I can’t say for sure about it going all the way, having never been in quite exactly that position. I’ve made out with a transgendered person (pre-op) before, and it wasn’t a problem. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/5 "2010-04-24T12:47:55Z")
I’m gay, and it wouldn’t matter to me. Since you stipulated that he’d be completely post-op and my type, I’d have absolutely no problem with dating him . . . and even more. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/6 "2010-04-24T13:13:44Z")
As long as he’s got all the man parts, I don’t really care. (Female, straight.) ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/7 "2010-04-24T13:28:15Z")
I struggle with this one because I’d really like to say I would, but I don’t think so. There’s a subtlety to femininity that goes beyond having the right parts thats hard for me to put my finger on - life experience? Skin? (don’t laugh, skin is a big part of what I find physically wonderful about women, a woman’s skin is soooo much softer). Body shape? They way they walk? And I HATE fake tits 😉 Me = Female. Lesbian. ---
**Author:** ![Teacake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Teacake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teacake)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/8 "2010-04-24T13:40:22Z")
I can’t decide whether to vote for “no problem” or “don’t know” - which I suppose really means I don’t know. As far as I know, I’ve never been involved even - ahem - briefly, with someone who was transgendered. I’m pretty sure their previous physical gender wouldn’t matter to me; it certainly doesn’t even cross my mind with my transgender friends. People are who they are now and who they feel like they are, as far as I’m concerned. I think with a lover I’d be most concerned about how well the surgeons had done in terms of function, I think I would find it unbearable if they couldn’t enjoy sex. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/9 "2010-04-24T14:13:48Z")
I’m straight, and intellectually I wouldn’t have a problem with it at all. Physically, though, my understanding is that the f-to-m surgery is still, you know, not as functional as the kind you’re born with. If he couldn’t enjoy it, or I couldn’t enjoy it, that’s a bit of a problem. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/10 "2010-04-24T14:19:57Z")
I wouldn’t care. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/11 "2010-04-24T15:57:47Z")
Bi-no prob. ---
**Author:** ![runcible\_spoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@runcible\_spoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runcible_spoon)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/12 "2010-04-24T16:08:19Z")
In theory, I’d like to say it wouldn’t be a problem, but in my (admittedly limited) experience, the surgeons can do a good job, but not a good enough job. Granted, I’m basing that on all of two (three?) individuals, which is why I hesitate to say no - frankly, I just don’t know enough transsexual people to know. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/13 "2010-04-24T16:16:16Z")
Straight, and it’s an odd question for me. I think it’d depend entirely on the person in question, and also whether or not I’d ever met them before pre-transition. My closest friend is MtF, and while she’s pretty enough that most people don’t think twice about treating her as female, I was her friend pre-transition and helped her through most of the process. While I have absolutely no trouble thinking of her as female now, there’s just zero physical attraction there. I don’t think anything can really prepare you for seeing the person you’ve known online for years as female show up at your house with a beard. I can’t say for certain how I’d feel if I’d only ever met her post-transition. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/14 "2010-04-24T17:29:57Z")
Argh, I have GOT to stop voting in polls before I actually read the OP. I voted for “maybe/I don’t know” because I feel like in theory, I think it would be fine, but I’ve never been particularly attracted to the transsexual people I’ve met. Now that I’ve read the OP, I wish I could change my vote to “I wouldn’t have a problem.” ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/15 "2010-04-24T17:35:09Z")
Straight,- I don’t know / maybe. I don’t really have a problem with it, but it would have to be an excellent transformation all the way round. Good enough for me to completely forget about/ not notice. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/16 "2010-04-24T17:56:46Z")
I said no because I really don’t think I could ever be truly comfortable with it. I do have several trans friends and that is cool, but for a relationship I doubt I could. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/17 "2010-04-24T19:03:06Z")
Yes, it would be a problem for me – perhaps that indicates I have some unresolved psychological issues of my own, but there you have it. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/18 "2010-04-24T20:33:14Z")
Straight male. I wouldn’t have a problem with it. > [@SanVito](#): > > And I HATE fake tits 😉 The hormone therapy can (and often does) cause the growth of nice, implant-free breasts. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/19 "2010-04-24T20:45:43Z")
Gay male Very big maybe. I’ve seen lots of photos of female to male, and never seen one I found attractive. In theory though, if he _was_ my type physically, then I wouldn’t rule it out. Can they make him look like Jason Statham or something? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2010, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187/20 "2010-04-24T21:14:17Z")
Straight, and it wouldn’t be a problem for me at all. I’ve seen several FtM people that I found attractive. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gay-vs-straight-people-willingness-to-date-a-transsexual-person/537187.md?page=2)