# Gays Are Like Smoking-Just Say No? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 15, 2005, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977 "2005-05-15T22:31:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![jlzania](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jlzania](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jlzania)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/41 "2005-05-16T16:59:35Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > The mistake a lot of the reasonable people on this subject make is thinking that because the other side thinks that being gay is a choice, then they also must believe that being straight is a choice. They do not. They believe being straight is a _default_, that everyone is straight from the beginning and that if you are gay, you chose to turn away from your natural inclination and join the perverts. > > Those of us on the pro- or at least neutral-gay side see this issue as a lever with the fulcrum in the center. Anti-gay folks don’t see it as a lever at all, just the basic ground (straight) and some weird floating island off to the side (gay). The “gay by perverse choice’” camp’s logic is totally baffling to me. Why you voluntarily chose to be discriminated against, beaten or even killed just to get your sexual jollies if you really had a choice? I remember when my best friend (God rest his soul) came out on my front porch. I asked him when he knew that he was gay and he replied that he realized he was different from his brothers and sisters when they watched the Mouseketeers as children. His brothers were hot for Annette but he always was much more interested in Cubby. ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/42 "2005-05-16T17:05:14Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > **danceswithcats** , I wrote a response letter to the _Record_ through the site. Since I’m a semi-local, they may actually print it. > > But damn if I didn’t forget to copy so I could paste it in here… :smack: I so hope you invited him to a night at Altland’s Ranch. ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/43 "2005-05-16T17:40:00Z")
I wish some of that personal grooming and interior decorating skill would get to me via second-hand gayness. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/44 "2005-05-16T17:44:00Z")
Hell, I wish some of it would get to me through _first_-hand gayness. (But noooooooo. I get all the stereotypes that make people hate me. :grump: ) ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/45 "2005-05-16T18:27:55Z")
> [@FinnAgain](#): > > No no, by virtue of licking the cock. Heh heh heh. I’ll have to remember to tell him that one. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/46 "2005-05-16T18:48:55Z")
> [@](#): > > Homosexuals and lesbians are very much like smokers . . . Smoking not only hurts the smoker, but it also harms those nearby with second-hand smoke . . . We cannot help but keep our distance from gays in the hopes that we and our children do not fall into the same trap that they have. I’m munching carpet all day, Now I’m a lesbo cliché— All 'cause I’ve gotten Second-hand gay! Now my longtime boyfriend, good old Larry Flicks his wrist and simpers, “Oh, you Mary!” Second hand dyke, I ride a big Harley bike— I’ve thrown out all my lipstick and my pearls. It’s all because those faygelas were gay in my face; I’ve left my office job and work at a Navy base. That’s why I say That I’ve caught second gay— So, Park Slope, here I come . . . ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/47 "2005-05-16T19:01:02Z")
Once again, I bow to Eve. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/48 "2005-05-16T20:56:21Z")
> [@supervenusfreak](#): > > I so hope you invited him to a night at Altland’s Ranch. Is that place really a gay hangout? I’ve heard it rumored so, but kinda dismissed it as nothing more than rumor. If it is, then woo-hoo. I’ve been living within a few miles of there for 10 years and haven’t caught **teh gay**. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/49 "2005-05-17T01:06:25Z")
> [@The Hook](#): > > You know, smoking is _legal_. Wellllllll, SOME people want to ban that too. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/50 "2005-05-17T01:12:02Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > That’s pretty much my take on the whole gay marriage thing, too - why do all the angry people care so damned much? … I just don’t get why so many people feel other people’s business is their business. I feel that way about almost everything, and it infuriates me when other people not only can’t understand that, but feel the need to keep hammering away. Why do people need to MAKE everyone else live and think and do their way? ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/51 "2005-05-17T01:14:25Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > Is that place really a gay hangout? I’ve heard it rumored so, but kinda dismissed it as nothing more than rumor. If it is, then woo-hoo. I’ve been living within a few miles of there for 10 years and haven’t caught **teh gay**. 😛 LOL. Yeah it is a gay hangout. We call it the bingo hall. It isn’t the stereotypical “gay club” atmosphere. Nice place to dance and have a few rounds with friends. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/52 "2005-05-17T01:38:34Z")
> [@jlzania](#): > > You know, I was listening to one of our more moronic Texas legislators babbling on about gay foster parents, explaining a child might become seriously conflicted about their sexuality if he or she was raised in a gay home. > I wanted to sit him down and ask him if he’d always known that he liked girls. > When he replied affirmatively, my next question would have been if there was any influence that could have steered him towards sex with his own gender. > When he indignantly snorted "Not no but hell no”, I would have smirked and replied “Well-that negates your whole stupid argument, now doesn’t it.” That reminds me of a wonderful quote attributed to Lyndon Johnson… “I may not be able to call him a pig fucker, but I can sure make him deny it”. Whether you liiked or hated LBJ, he had a sharp sense of humor sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/53 "2005-05-17T15:56:10Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally Posted by featherlou > That’s pretty much my take on the whole gay marriage thing, too - why do all the angry people care so damned much? … I just don’t get why so many people feel other people’s business is their business. > [@SteveG1](#): > > I feel that way about almost everything, and it infuriates me when other people not only can’t understand that, but feel the need to keep hammering away. Why do people need to MAKE everyone else live and think and do their way? You wouldn’t be bringing in baggage from another thread, would you? ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/54 "2005-05-17T15:59:39Z")
Sounds to me more like baggage from the real world. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/55 "2005-05-17T17:00:18Z")
> [@jlzania](#): > > You know, I was listening to one of our more moronic Texas legislators babbling on about gay foster parents, explaining a child might become seriously conflicted about their sexuality if he or she was raised in a gay home. > I wanted to sit him down and ask him if he’d always known that he liked girls. > When he replied affirmatively, my next question would have been if there was any influence that could have steered him towards sex with his own gender. > When he indignantly snorted "Not no but hell no”, I would have smirked and replied “Well-that negates your whole stupid argument, now doesn’t it.” On ‘The Daily Show’ they do a bit where they have kids re-enact “Great Moments In Punditry” or something like that, and they did a short bit of Jerry Falwell basically being asked the same thing. If I heard right, and the Daily Show wasn’t making shit up, Falwell said he was attracted to men. So, he would have avoided that trap. Whether he said it in order to avoid the trap, or he actually was attracted to men, is of course pure speculation. (Confirmation or correction about what I thought I heard is most welcome) ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/56 "2005-05-17T17:05:46Z")
Well let’s see. What are some of the things we do, that other people want to control, curtail, tax, or ban? I will deliberately not include “another thread” exept for one item from it (try to spot it): Who to love, who to live with - the subject of this very thread What car to drive - various anti-SUV, anti-truck, anti-guzzler What breeds of dog to own - at various times, shepherds, dobies, rotties, pits, chows, etc were “bad dogs” What to eat - calls for legislation against “bad food” and serving sizes What to drink - prohibition in the past, various excise and “sin” taxes now What guns are allowed, not allowed, or to ban them all What not to hunt or fish What words are not allowed We may as well include what opinions are apparently “not allowed”. Just how much control of our lives are we supposed to give away? Where does it end? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/57 "2005-05-17T19:25:35Z")
Okay, my bad - I thought perhaps you were continuing the argument from the smoking thread over here, since we had both had very polarized positions over there. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/58 "2005-05-17T19:49:58Z")
No, that’s a separate discussion, and it’s best we leave that over there, where it belongs. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/59 "2005-05-17T21:13:35Z")
> [@Seven](#): > > I like to think most letters to the editor are based on a dare or are a joke. You know, the first glance over that, to me looked like “I like to think most letters to the editor are written by kids in daycare” ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2005, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977/60 "2005-05-17T21:16:11Z")
> [@Snakescatlady](#): > > While I was in Orlando last week I saw a billboard which basically stated “You can choose not to be gay so call us so you won’t go to hell” with a phone number for a local church. > ! How about a billboard that says “You can choose not to be a christian so call us so you won’t be a dick”, put right next to it? And I say that as a Christian. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gays-are-like-smoking-just-say-no/303977.md?page=4)