# Gee, maybe I can get hit by a fucking TRUCK, too! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 23, 2000, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442 "2000-08-23T14:41:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/1 "2000-08-23T14:41:38Z")
The last 48 hours have SUCKED SUCKED SUCKED. Goddammit! I am in a PISSY MOOD! Let’s see: To start with, my old landlord from Cleveland claims a bunch of fucking charges against our security deposit–in fact **in excess** of our security deposit. Some of the items were for things done by _prior fucking tenants_. After going back and forth with him on just exactly what we are and aren’t responsible for, he still claims a bunch of money. I don’t feel like dragging this shit out, so I sent him the bloody check Monday. Yesterday morning, we leave early for work. There is, apparently, an accident on US1 heading north towards the Beltway. Only we don’t know this until traffic merges from one lane down to three right before. As we pass, I count 11 – 11! – police officers there, several of whom are doing nothing. One is literally sitting sidesaddle on his motorcycle, contentedly staring up the fucking street. How, how about one of you maybe **directing some traffic**?? So it takes us 25 minutes to go four miles, and I’m late to work. I get to work, and the elevators aren’t working properly. I have to climb the stairs a couple of levels to catch one. At least I didn’t have to climb 10 floors. Yesterday evening, as I am waiting for Leigh-Anne to pick me up, I get a call from her. She’s got a flat tire in her parking lot. Peachy. We were planning on getting new front tires soon anyway, so I assume it’s one of the fronts. Nope. It’s the rear driver’s side. So, since I was getting the front ones, now I have to get one back one, and of course I can’t just do _three_ tires, so the purchase of two tires suddenly becomes four. We’re leaving this morning to go to work, Leigh-Anne looks over, and our bikes have been stolen off of our patio. Three bikes, all gone, the chains cut. I have renter’s insurance, so the bikes are covered, but goddammit, I’m hate that feeling of someone else just walking up and taking your shit!! Fuck!!! What the hell **else** can happen to me today? ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/2 "2000-08-23T15:04:46Z")
Um, yipe. I still love you, Phil! _runs like hell in case Phil takes that the wrong way_ ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/3 "2000-08-23T15:18:08Z")
{{{{{{{{Phil}}}}}}}}} Gee, what else can happen? Maybe they will change the law and make school prayer required…ducking… ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/4 "2000-08-23T15:52:04Z")
Look both ways before crossing 😃 -Sam ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/5 "2000-08-23T15:54:38Z")
[bubbe] At least you have your health, Phil. [/bubbe] ---
**Author:** ![Peta\_Tzunami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@Peta\_Tzunami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peta_Tzunami)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/6 "2000-08-23T17:50:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pldennison \* > \*\*The last 48 hours have SUCKED SUCKED SUCKED. Goddammit! I am in a PISSY MOOD! > > Let’s see: > \ > > Yesterday evening, as I am waiting for Leigh-Anne to pick me up, I get a call from her. She’s got a flat tire in her parking lot. Peachy. We were planning on getting new front tires soon anyway, so I assume it’s one of the fronts. Nope. It’s the rear driver’s side. So, since I was getting the front ones, now I have to get one back one, and of course I can’t just do _three_ tires, so the purchase of two tires suddenly becomes four. \ > \*\* Gee, it wasn’t much consolation, but I (yes, I will do something fairly rare for me and brag) I changed the tire **by myself.** Oh, sure, some _man_ finally came out of the building and offered to help after I’d gotten the car jacked up (on I swear the smallest jack I’ve ever seen) and had the old tire off…he held the spare while I put on the lug nuts and gave them an extra twist and then put the damaged tire in the trunk…but the rest was all me. And let me tell you it wasn’t an easy task, but it sometimes feels good to know I don’t have to stand there ringing my hands waiting for some big strong man to help me. There was another man who asked how I was doing (while I was kneeing on the ground gradually cranking the jack and getting excessively grimey) and if I “had it.” When I replied yes, he said, “Good…I didn’t want to get dirty,” got in his SUV and drove away. I laughed to myself because I didn’t much care about getting his help. Sure, its nice when people stop to offer help (I would’ve loved a full-service garage to pop onto the spot), but I felt sufficiently independent and capable of completing the task at hand. (BTW, the guy who did help at the end had that “step aside and let a man help you” air to him.\) Of course, today I’m sore, but I can deal. Still…it would’ve been nice if those things hadn’t happened. BTW, Phil, I understand from a man who got on the Cue bus that (after I arrived) they had to stop all trains coming in and out of the station because of a fire in one the of tunnels! \ Peta T. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/7 "2000-08-23T18:24:31Z")
Do NOT buy a lottery ticket today. Your karma is definitely in the red. SERENITY NOW! ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/8 "2000-08-23T18:32:18Z")
On a day like this, it’s best to cook your own meals! ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/9 "2000-08-23T19:04:17Z")
**trade** - What? Are you daft? And risk having the cat decide to investigate the frying pan while Phil simmers his vegetables? Or having the refridgerator spontaneously combust? Or having a small gas leak start and slowly lead to carbon monoxide poisoning while watching _Frasier_? (After all, it’s hard to tell the difference between watching _Frasier_ and slow carbon monoxide poisoning.) True, ordering out could result in disaster. (“Yes, you order pork and beef special! We have order right here! You get free dog-fried rice with!”) But given the alternatives, fasting is probably the best option. And “Phil simmers his vegetables” is probably the best euphemism for masturbation I’ve made all week. ---
**Author:** ![Peta\_Tzunami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@Peta\_Tzunami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peta_Tzunami)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/10 "2000-08-23T20:09:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by John Corrado \* > **trade- What? Are you daft? And risk having the cat decide to investigate the frying pan while Phil simmers his vegetables? Or having the refridgerator spontaneously combust? Or having a small gas leak start and slowly lead to carbon monoxide poisoning while watching _Frasier_? (After all, it’s hard to tell the difference between watching _Frasier_ and slow carbon monoxide poisoning.)** [Hijack] Immediately I make the _Simpson_ connection. _Fraiser’s_ Kelsey Grammer (Grahmer? Too lazy to look it up) as Sideshow Bob trying to kill Bart’s aunt Selma with a slow gas leak meant to cause a massive explosion when she lights her cigarette. That’s a lot John for proving I’m being mentally molded by PLD’s Simpson obsession! 😛 [/Hijack] And Trade–You mean I gotta _cook_, TOO?! ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/11 "2000-08-23T20:09:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Peta Tzunami \* > > \*\*And let me tell you it wasn’t an easy task, but it sometimes feels good to know I don’t have to stand there ringing my hands waiting for some big strong man to help me. \*\* Phil, I _ **told** _ you not to get her that vibrator! :: D & R :: * * * Yer pal, Satan [sub]I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Four months, two weeks, 18 hours, 7 minutes and 45 seconds. 5470 cigarettes not smoked, saving $683.77. Extra life with Drain Bead: 2 weeks, 4 days, 23 hours, 50 minutes.[/sub] **_"Satan is not an unattractive person."_-Drain Bead** [sub]Thanks for the ringing endorsement, honey![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Peta\_Tzunami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@Peta\_Tzunami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peta_Tzunami)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/12 "2000-08-23T20:12:39Z")
And here I was worried about my use of the term “jacked up”! ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/13 "2000-08-23T20:29:39Z")
that sucks phil. But, look on the bright side, at least it’s not worse. Go take a nice relaxing bubble bath. You’ll feel much better afterwords. And today isn’t all bad. Look at what happened with the Mcdonalds case. ---
**Author:** ![BullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@BullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BullDawg)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/14 "2000-08-23T21:57:36Z")
Does that mean the size of the tires is different on the front then on the back? Otherwise why couldn’t you still only replace 2 tires? Maybe I need to get a newer vehicle someday so I know these kinds of things :-p ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2000, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/15 "2000-08-23T23:46:03Z")
> [@](#): > > Does that mean the size of the tires is different on the front then on the back? Otherwise why couldn’t you still only replace 2 tires? Maybe I need to get a newer vehicle someday so I know these kinds of things Well, theoretically I could’ve **just** replaced or repaired the one that was punctured, but I prefer to replace them on a per-axle basis, two at a time. So I replace the two rear ones, and that leaves me with two new in the back, and two nearly treadless ones in the front, which doesn’t leave me feeling too safe in a FWD car. ---
**Author:** ![Archer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@Archer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archer)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/16 "2000-08-24T00:20:19Z")
Okay, pull the front of your pants out and look down inside. Is Mr. Happy still there? See, life isn’t that bad. ---
**Author:** ![Stormi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Stormi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stormi)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/17 "2000-08-24T06:00:25Z")
When it rains, it pours. Here’s hoping tomorrow is a sunny day for you. Sorry about your bad luck. Let’s hope whoever is now riding your bike slams their privates on that hard bar. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BullDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@BullDawg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BullDawg)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/18 "2000-08-24T17:00:35Z")
After I thought about it I realized that you already had 2 tires you were replacing and the flat would have made a 3rd tire. I can understand not wanting to replace just 3 tires. (in my best Gilda Radner voice) Nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Peta\_Tzunami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@Peta\_Tzunami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peta_Tzunami)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2000, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/19 "2000-08-25T02:40:55Z")
_Hurray_, we’ve found the cats have fleas! At least we’re all suffering together. Treatment is underway and hopefully this will be cleared up soon. BTW, this is hte first time ever (and the eldest cat is 8) that our cats have gotten fleas. \At least our moods have lightened…taking in all in stride and all that rot. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2000, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442/20 "2000-08-25T04:54:06Z")
Hey! Fleas have rights too! Insects are animals! We should peacefully co-exist with fleas, ticks, chiggers, scorpio… OW! HEY! Stop throwing things at me you two! AGH! :: running :: * * * Yer pal, Satan [sub]TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: Four months, two weeks, two days, 2 hours, 50 minutes and 0 seconds. 5524 cigarettes not smoked, saving $690.59. Extra time with Drain Bead: 2 weeks, 5 days, 4 hours, 20 minutes.[/sub] **_"Satan is not an unattractive person."_-Drain Bead** [sub]Thanks for the ringing endorsement, honey!\*[/sub] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gee-maybe-i-can-get-hit-by-a-fucking-truck-too/30442.md?page=2)