# Geekiest joke ever? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2007, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695 "2007-11-25T14:51:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/21 "2007-11-26T06:18:07Z")
“Is that a Nanotube in your pocket or do you have a hard-on?” Eh… ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/22 "2007-11-26T06:25:37Z")
[QUOTE=KGS] I thought the nerdiest joke ever was y = r^3/3 – if you determine the rate of change in this curve correctly, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised. [/QUOTE] dy/dr = r^2. Am I missing something here? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Rosewater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mr.Rosewater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Rosewater)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/23 "2007-11-26T06:42:27Z")
[QUOTE=Rysto] dy/dr = r^2. Am I missing something here? [/QUOTE] It is supposed to come out as ‘rdrr’, which could be pronounced ‘har de har har’ (ala Jackie Gleason). It is a Simpsons joke from the \*Bart the Genius \* episode. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/24 "2007-11-26T07:27:07Z")
According to Freud, what comes between fear and sex? Fünf. ---
**Author:** ![ForumBot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee59a6/32.png) [@ForumBot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ForumBot)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/25 "2007-11-26T08:05:42Z")
[QUOTE=matt\_mcl] According to Freud, what comes between fear and sex? Fünf. [/QUOTE] … … Bwahhahahahahahahaha. That was terrific. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/26 "2007-11-26T08:11:54Z")
I still like the first one I saw: SELECT \* FROM users WHERE clue \> 0 No rows returned and a true incident at work that absolutely broke me up. I was filling out a form and said to everyone in general, “what’s the date today?” Wihout looking up from his programming one guy said, “sysdate.” ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/27 "2007-11-26T10:06:27Z")
Two jokes: f(x) = 3x^2 walks into a bar. The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.” f(x) = 6x waks into a bar. The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.” Some people might object that these are the same joke. In fact they’re not, but the second one is derivative. ---
**Author:** ![TPWombat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbce88/32.png) [@TPWombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TPWombat)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/28 "2007-11-26T10:19:04Z")
Two Heisenbergian particles walking down the road together, one turns to the other and whispers "_Don’t look now, but I think we’re being watched"_ ---
**Author:** ![tonedef](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f05b48/32.png) [@tonedef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tonedef)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/29 "2007-11-26T10:45:52Z")
> **[T-Shirt Hell :: KEEPIN' I.T. REAL](https://www.tshirthell.com/funny-shirts/keepin-it-real/?xid=4c76226e-2d62-1f94-19d3-4ee266c9ecb7)** > > Keepin' I.t. Real ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/30 "2007-11-26T13:04:41Z")
[QUOTE=amrussell] Two jokes: f(x) = 3x^2 walks into a bar. The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.” f(x) = 6x waks into a bar. The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions.” Some people might object that these are the same joke. In fact they’re not, but the second one is derivative. [/QUOTE] Brilliant! 😃 However, [geeky nitpick]it works even better if the second one begins “f\*\* ’ \*\*(x) = 6x walks into a bar.”[/gn] 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Engineer\_Dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9fc29f/32.png) [@Engineer\_Dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Engineer_Dude)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/31 "2007-11-26T13:42:56Z")
C:/dos C:/dos/run Run/dos/run ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/32 "2007-11-26T14:58:53Z")
I love xkcd as well, and in my opinion, the geekiest strip is [this one](http://www.xkcd.com/327/). ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/33 "2007-11-26T16:33:23Z")
Why do geeks celebrate Christmas on Halloween? Because oct 31 = dec 25 See, 31 in octal, or base 8, is equal to 25 in base 10, or decimal ---
**Author:** ![cantara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6f9a4e/32.png) [@cantara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cantara)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/34 "2007-11-26T17:09:28Z")
[QUOTE=Rysto] dy/dr = r^2. Am I missing something here? [/QUOTE] I had heard it (in HS prior to calculus) as \*\*(rd)[sup]2[/sup]r[sup]3[/sup] \*\* Apparently it wasn’t geeky enough… ---
**Author:** ![lalenin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@lalenin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lalenin)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/35 "2007-11-26T18:30:02Z")
[QUOTE=Engineer Dude] C:/dos C:/dos/run Run/dos/run [/QUOTE] I beg your pardon but it’s supposed to be: C\*\*:>**dos C **:>** dos**\*_run Run_\*\*_dos_\*\*\*run ---
**Author:** ![Baffle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dec6dc/32.png) [@Baffle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baffle)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/36 "2007-11-26T18:48:32Z")
Drop the \> and you’d be right. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/37 "2007-11-26T18:53:12Z")
My pitiful contribution: How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome? Pull down its genes. ---
**Author:** ![lalenin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@lalenin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lalenin)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/38 "2007-11-26T18:56:18Z")
[QUOTE=Baffle] Drop the \> and you’d be right. [/QUOTE] Does the ‘\>’ only appear in Windows command line not original DOS? I don’t remember any more. ---
**Author:** ![Walton\_Firm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/45deac/32.png) [@Walton\_Firm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walton_Firm)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/39 "2007-11-26T19:06:36Z")
How many people can read hex, if only you and dead people can read hex? 57006 ---
**Author:** ![Ferd\_Burfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecccb3/32.png) [@Ferd\_Burfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferd_Burfel)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2007, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695/40 "2007-11-26T20:24:14Z")
Two hydrogen atoms are talking: Atom 1: I just don’t feel right since I lost my electron. Atom 2: Lost your electron! Are you certain? Atom 1: I’m positive. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/geekiest-joke-ever/427695.md?page=3)